Crash Course In Listening

I was saying goodbye to my friend at 3 AM when a car crashed into a tree outside my house. A man and a woman stumbled out and ran away as the car started to catch fire and set the tree alight. I called emergency services and waited down the road as the car’s engine let off small intermittent explosions.

Eventually the fire brigade arrived, dealt with the fire and removed the car from the scene. I went home, opened all the windows to clear the smoke that had got in, and fell asleep.

The next day I was awoken by a phone call.

Operator: “You called emergency services last night about a car crash?”

Me: “Yes, that’s me.”

Operator: “And was anyone injured?”

Me: “I don’t know. They ran off before anyone arrived.”

Operator: “But are they okay? Do they need treatment?”

Me: “No, like I said, they ran away. They were probably wasted and didn’t want to get arrested for drunk driving and property damage.”

Operator: “It’s important that they get help if they’ve been in an accident. Can you give me a contact number?”

Me: “I said I don’t know. I don’t know them. And frankly, I don’t care. It was lucky I was standing outside when it happened, or maybe no one would have known. Maybe my house would have been set on fire.”

Operator: “You really must give us their information so we can get in touch with them.”

Me: “If you ask me anything else about them, I’m going to hang up. Maybe run the number plate of their towed, burned-out car and find them that way.”

Operator: “You understand obstruction of emergency services is a crime.”

Me: “Then come arrest me. You know exactly where I live. It’s next to the charred tree remains.”

I haven’t heard a thing since.