Couldn’t Finish The Flirtation Marathon

Working in a sports bar can be very interesting. A football match is on (soccer to you Americans), and I’ve just handed a beer to a customer who has been badgering a couple of women for a few minutes. They’ve politely told him they just want to watch the match, but he isn’t getting the hint and has been trying to “impress” them with his footy knowledge.

Customer: “You know the referee runs over the distance of a marathon during a game!”

Me: *Deciding to intervene* “A football game is only ninety minutes long, and the marathon record is just over two hours.”

Customer: “So?”

Me: “So… that’s impossible.”

Customer: “It is possible, because a football referee changes direction a lot during a game, and it all adds up.”

The women start laughing at this, and the customer realises they’re laughing at him, not with him.

Woman: *Between giggles* “It should be less, then, since going backward subtracts some distance!”

Customer: *Storming off angrily with his beer* “You all know nothing about football!”