Comedy Is All In The Delivery

| Working | April 1, 2014

(My courier driver and I adore dry sarcasm. Typically his route brings him to my house around 10 at night, but this time his route has been altered and he arrives at noon.)

Me: “Is it 10 pm already?”

Driver: *deadpan* “Absolutely.”

Me: “Well, SHOOT! I forgot to pick my kid up from school!”

Driver: “That’s okay. I’ve got her in the truck. She has a shipping label.”

Me: “Wait, ‘she?’ I only have boys.”

Driver: “But… she has a shipping label.”

Me: “I don’t know what to tell you. You have someone else’s kid out there.”

(A mock confused expression crosses the driver’s face. He hands me my package and walks away mumbling.)

Driver: “But, she even has a shipping label…”

(My wife comes out, having heard the last half of our conversation.)

Wife: “Who on EARTH were you talking to just now?”

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