Cold Hard Cash(iers)

(My mother is a cashier at a popular liquor store. I stop by to drop off her lunch. The credit card machines have shut down and the manager is in the back trying to get them running. The employees have let their customers know they will have to pay cash until then. Some customers leave for another store; most went next door to the bank ATM to get cash. One customer, however, isn’t particularly happy about this.)

Customer: “So, you’re telling me I have to walk all the way over to the ATM to get cash?”

(Note: the bank is right next door.)

Mom: “I’m sorry, sir, but the credit card machine is down for the moment. You can go to the ATM or go to another store.”

Customer: *scoffs* “Fine.”

(He leaves the store, and comes back a few minutes later with cash in his hand.)

Customer: “I had to pay three dollars to get money out of that ATM! I better get a discount!”

Mom: “I’m sorry, sir. I don’t have that authority.”

Customer: “I don’t care! I better get one!”

(He picks up a $50 Scotch and returns to my mom’s register; she rings him up.)

Customer: “Hey, you didn’t give me my discount!”

Mom: “Sir, I’m sorry but I can’t give you three dollars off because you made the choice to go to the ATM.”

Customer: “B****, give me three dollars off!”

(The store goes absolutely silent, and everyone is watching the exchange.)

Me: “Don’t talk to my mother that way.”

Mom: “I’ll tell you what I can do.” *takes scotch and puts it under her stand* “I can refuse to sell this to you.”

Customer: “I want to see your manager!”

Mom: “Fine.” *calls manager*

Manager: *comes over* “What’s the problem?”

Customer: “Your employee said, and I quote, “I won’t sell you s***!”

Me: “No, she didn’t!”

Mom: “Sir, I did not use that language towards you.”

Customer #2: “I’m a witness, and she didn’t say that.”

Customer: “I WANT A DISCOUNT!”

Manager: “Sir, leave. Now.”

Customer: “Give me my discount!”

Manager: “If you don’t leave right now I will call the cops.”

Customer: “Fine, call the cops! I don’t care!”

(The manager, Customer #2 and I, pull out our cell phones.)

Customer: “I’m never coming back!” *runs out of the store*

Me: “What was his problem?”

Customer #2: “That guy needs to pull up his skirt.” *smiles at my mom* “I’ll keep coming back for the wonderful customer service, and tough-as-nails cashiers!”