Closing Time Really Sets Them On Fire

, , , | Right | August 11, 2017

(About five minutes before we’re scheduled to close, we notice smoke coming from the back office, so we evacuate the building and call 911. A car pulls up and parks a few minutes later while the fire department is inside. A man gets out, and begins walking toward the building.)

Man: “Looks like there’s something going on at [Restaurant], huh?”

Manager: “Yeah. We had a small fire tonight, but it’s under control and nobody was hurt.”

(He breezes past us, toward the door of the restaurant.)

Manager: “Sir! What are you doing?”

Man: “I was just going to swing into [Restaurant] for dinner really quickly.”

Manager: “You can’t go in there, sir.”

Man: “I don’t need to mess with the fire. I just want a sandwich.”

Manager: “There’s nobody in there to serve you. We’re all out here.” *she motions to the group of us, all in shirts with the restaurant’s logo on it* “We evacuated the building because it was on fire.”

Man: “But you said it was under control now! What if I gave you my money, and you went in, made my sandwich, and brought it back out to me?”

Manager: “We closed fifteen minutes ago. Even if nothing had happened and we were all inside, you still wouldn’t be able to come in, because we’d be closed.”

Man: “That’s bull-s**t; you guys just don’t want to make my food! I’ll take my business to [Competitor].”

Manager: “And they’ll let you in, because not only are they still open, but their building is also not currently on fire.”

(The man stormed back to his car, swearing to never come to our restaurant again, and sped off in a huff.)

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