Closing Before It Gets Too Hairy

Me: *answering phone* “Hello, this is [Store]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “DO YOU HAVE MOUSTACHES?”

Me: “If you mean fake moustaches for costumes, yes.”

Customer: “Great. What time do you close?”

Me: “In about 10 minutes.”

Customer: “Can you stay open? I really need those moustaches and I’m on [Road that is 30 minutes away].”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, I have to close at nine.”

(Even if I wanted to stay open longer, I wouldn’t be able to as corporate sets the hours of operation and if I stay late I could be fired.)

Customer: “Please? What if you buy them for me and leave them outside the door? I’ll tape the money to the door.”

Me: “I don’t believe in lending money to strangers.”

Customer: “C’mon, don’t be a b****. I need these moustaches.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I’m ending this conversation.”

(I hung up the phone and started closing the store. Around the time I left the customer showed up to scream at me through the locked door. I guess those moustaches were really important!)