Caught In The Middle

, , , , | Friendly | December 1, 2018

(I am a remote employee. I’m chatting via phone with two coworkers who happen to be good friends of mine, as well. They ask if I need any supplies, and I jokingly say I need one of those edible fruit and chocolate arrangements from TV. Unbeknownst to me, these two sweethearts decide that because my husband and I have had to deal with a lot lately, they will split the cost of actually ordering one of these arrangements for us as a surprise. Of note is that these two guys only ever refer to me by my middle name, and I’m not really used to hearing it anywhere else. A few days later, having forgotten all about my offhand joke, I am working at home when there is a knock at my door early in the morning. I initially ignore it, because we get a lot of solicitors and I’m not expecting anything. But then there’s a louder knock and I finally answer it.)

Delivery Guy: *holding the bouquet with a big smile* “[Middle Name]?”

Me: “Oh! I think you have the wrong house.”

Delivery Guy: “Oh! I’m sorry.”

Me: “No problem. Have a good day.”

(A few minutes later he knocks again.)

Delivery Guy: “Sorry, I’ve just confirmed this is the address. Is it maybe a surprise for you?”

Me: “Well… there’s no [My Own Friggin Middle Name] here.”

Delivery Guy: “Hmm! Okay, sorry for the bother; I’ll get it sorted.”

(I shut the door and my husband pokes his head into the hallway.)

Husband: “What was that?”

Me: “A delivery for someone named [Once Again, I Stress, MY Middle Name]. Wrong address.”

Husband: *stares at me*

Me: “What?”

Husband: “Honey…”

Me: “Oh, my God, I’M [YES, MY MIDDLE NAME]!”

(I ran outside. Luckily, the poor delivery guy hadn’t driven off, as he was sitting in his vehicle calling the office trying to sort things out. He had a good laugh at my expense, and I tipped him generously to make up for my lapse in brain activity. I’m glad I have such thoughtful friends and coworkers, even if I must sometimes make them question whether I’m worth the effort if it’s this much trouble to do something nice for me.)

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