Category: Wild & Unruly

Ready To Bust His Pipes

| Omaha, NE, USA | Bigotry, Home Improvement, Top, Wild & Unruly

(I’m a fairly petite, young looking woman, who grew up with three brothers, and a single father. I’m one of the better employees for plumbing help, because my dad made me learn.)

Me: “Welcome to [store]; what’s the project today?”

Customer: “My toilet leaks; I need one of your guys to help.”

Me: “Let’s head to plumbing. Where is the leak from?”

Customer: “I want one of the guys, and not some idiot girl.”

Me: “Okay, I’ll radio one of them.”

(A coworker responds, and I turn the customer over and go back to restocking. A few minutes later, the customer storms up.)

Customer: “This is the stupidest hardware store! Where’s your manager?”

Me: “Sir, I’m sorry; what’s the problem?”

Customer: “I want your manager!”

Me: “They’ll be in tomorrow morning.”

(The customer stomps out. The next day, I’m in plumbing. I am helping one of our regular contractors, when yesterday’s cranky customer returns.)

Customer: “I want your manager!”

(The cashier radio calls them, and the owner actually responds first.)

Owner: “What’s the problem?”

Customer: “You have idiots working here! They can’t help in plumbing!”

(The owner gestures to me.)

Owner: “Sir, she is one of our plumbing experts, and was on last night.”

Customer: “I know that no idiot girl can help!”

(The contractor walks up.)

Contractor: “Watch your mouth! She is the best help you can get without calling a professional!”

Customer: “NO! Girls should be cashiers, and flirt with customers!”

Owner: “Sir, you’ll have to leave.”

Customer: “You can’t make me!”

Me: “Sir. I have two police officer brothers, a correctional officer father, a jujitsu trainer brother, and my martial arts training. You are leaving. By your choice or by force.”

(For a few moments, the customer contemplates if it’s worth the fight, but ultimately decides against it.)

Contractor: “Man, you ruin all my fun by giving him a choice!”

Owner: “Don’t encourage her. She isn’t in the gym, so she can’t go dislocating elbows here.”

Contractor: “Now both of you are ruining my fun!” *leaves*

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Life Is Stranger Than The Fiction Section

| SC, USA | Books & Reading, Theme Of The Month, Top, Wild & Unruly

Me: “Sorry, you can’t check this out.”

Patron: “Why not?”

Me: “You have three overdue books.”

Patron: “Is there anyway you can let this slide?”

Me: “Nope.”

(The patron proceeds to take off her shirt.)

Patron: “How about now?”

Me: “No. Please put on your shirt before I call the police.”

(The patron then takes off her pants, pulls aside her underwear, and soaks the floor. It is carpet, so there is a lot of damage. My coworker calls the police.)

Patron: “Now will you let it slide?”

Me: “No.”

Patron: “F*** you!”

(She goes over to a shelf, puts her back against it, and pees all over. It splashes up and ruins several books. She also defecates, picks up one of the books, tears out several pages, and uses it to wipe. The police arrive, and she calls her boyfriend, who is apparently in another section. He pleads with the police to let her free, but they don’t let her. He then adds to the mess that his girlfriend has already made. The police take him too. Later, we find another section that is completely ruined. That must have been where the boyfriend was.)

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Diabetes Meets Rabies

| Baltimore, MD, USA | Health & Body, Theme Of The Month, Wild & Unruly

(A customer is picking up some diabetic test-strips, and I am ringing him up.)

Me: “How are you doing today, sir?”

Customer: “I’m alright; how about yourself?”

Me: “I’m doing great, thanks. Did you have any questions for the pharmacist?”

(The customer gestures at the test strips, jokingly.)

Customer: “Yeah, do I really have to poke myself for these to work?”

Me: “Yep, I’m afraid so.”

Customer: “Can’t I just poke you instead?”

Me: *laughing* “Sorry, I’m afraid it doesn’t work that way, sir.”

(The customer gestures at my multiple facial piercings.)

Customer: “You look like the type that would enjoy that, though.”

Me: “Your doctor might have a problem with that, though.”

(When a customer picks up a prescription, they’re required by law to sign, stating that they’ve received it. Our pharmacy does this through an electronic prompt. The customer looks at it.)

Customer: “What’s this?”

Me: “It’s just a way to say that you’ve gotten your prescription. That way there’s no confusion later. It’s as much for your protection as ours really.”

Customer: “Well what happens if I don’t sign it?”

Me: “Then unfortunately, we’re not allowed to give you your prescriptions.”

Customer: “WELL I GUESS I’M NOT GETTING ANYTHING TODAY!”

(The customer THROWS the electronic pen across the counter, hitting me in the face. He turns, and practically skips away. The pharmacist and I aren’t sure if he is joking, but by the end of the day he still hasn’t come back!)

When Patience Is Paper Thin

| Howell, MI, USA | Technology, Theme Of The Month, Wild & Unruly

(A customer comes into the copy and print area while I’m helping another customer and her son. After ignoring my greeting, she goes over to the customer color-copy machines, and starts making copies.)

Customer: “Excuse me, but why am I being charged $0.49 a copy, when that sign says black and white are only $0.09?”

(The customer points to the sign over the black and white copy machines that advertise $0.09 a copy.)

Me: “You’re using the color machine, not a black and white. It’ll charge you $0.49 a copy when you use it.”

(I point to the sign above the color machine that states just that.)

Customer: “Well, can’t it see that I’m not copying color pages?”

Me: “No, it doesn’t have that sort of capability. It only knows that it is used for color copies, and charges accordingly.”

Customer: “Well why didn’t you stop me before I started making copies?!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I didn’t know you only had black and white pages. I can return your money and help you on the black and white machine if you would like.”

(The customer hands me the credit card she used to make the copies, and I refund her money. As I start to walk towards the black and white she pushes past me.)

Customer: “I don’t need your God-d*** help. You did enough already!”

(I return to the other customer and her son, and continue talking about his school project that he needs printed and finished. Five minutes go by, and the older woman has a stack of approximately 250 papers in her hand. She walks up to me and interrupts my conversation with the other customers.)

Customer: “I need these cut.”

Me: “We charge $2 for every 500 pieces of paper cut, per cut.”

Customer: “$2! Just for a few pieces of paper to be cut?! You must be out of your d*** mind! I’ll do them myself!”

(I show her to the small hand-cutter. I show her how it works, using only a few sheets of paper at a time. Only five seconds after I turn away, she starts shouting again.)

Customer: “THIS. ISN’T. WORKING!”

(I turn around to find that she has stuffed a quarter of her stack of papers under the blade. Every time she tries to cut, she rips the papers.)

Me: “Ma’am, you’re only supposed to do a maximum of 10 sheets at a time, like I showed you.”

Customer: “I DON’T HAVE TIME TO WASTE DOING ONLY A FEW PAGES AT A TIME!”

(The other customer and her son, and other nearby customers and associates are now watching as this angry customer fumes at me.)

Me: “I offered to cut them for you, and it was too much money. I showed how to properly cut them using the hand cutter, and you didn’t follow what I said. I don’t understand what you want me to do.”

Customer: “I WANT YOU TO REFUND MY RUINED COPIES AND DO THEM OVER, YOU LITTLE B****! AND THEN I WANT YOU TO CUT THEM ALL FOR FREE! YOU’VE WASTED MY TIME, AND I’M NOT PUTTING UP WITH YOUR SNARKY ATTITUDE!”

Me: “I’m not going to do that. I showed you how to cut them, and you didn’t listen. I have every right to refuse, especially after treating me with disrespect.”

Customer: “I AM NEVER SHOPPING HERE AGAIN!”

(The customer screams, grabs the ruined papers, and throws them into the air before storming off into another area of the store with her few good copies.)

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DOMArry The One You Love

| New York, USA | Awesome Customers, Bigotry, Love/Romance, Top, Wild & Unruly

(A co-worker and I are out to lunch on the weekend with our boss. We’re all really good friends and we are chatting with each other when we notice one of the waiters, who is thin and short, getting harassed by a group of teens.)

Rude Teen #1: “Haha, look at [waiter] f*** up like he always does!”

Rude Teen #2: “Ha! D*** f****t!”

(The waiter is doing a good job ignoring the rude teens, but it’s very obvious he’s feeling upset. He’s walking towards us when one of the teens trips the waiter. He falls face first into the food he is carrying.)

Rude Teen #1: *laughs hysterically* “Oops, don’t fall!”

(The waiter gets up and wipes his face off, but it’s very obvious that he is crying. Having been bullied myself for being gay and being appalled at what’s going on, I stand up and approach the table. Note, I’m 6’3″ and very strong. I stand in between the tables the kids are at and the waiter.)

Me: “Do we have a problem here?”

Rude Teen #2: “Mind your own business, man!”

Rude Teen #1: “Yeah, f*** off! This kid is a f****t anyways!”

Me: “I suggest you stop right now, or else…” *I push up my sleeve and flex* “…you all and I are going to have a problem.”

(The two teens slink down into their seats, and I walk the waiter over to his co-workers.)

Me: *to the waiter* “Hey, if anybody ever tries to harass you or hurt you again, call this number. I know what’s like for being bullied because you’re gay. Just remember: I’m here to help you.”

(I give the waiter my phone number. He hugs me and starts crying on my shoulder. While he is, the manager of the store comes by, and I explain the situation to him and point out the two teenagers. After the whole ordeal is done, the manager and the waiter come over to our table and give me a $100 gift card for helping them out. I tell them they don’t have to reward me for being a decent human being, but they keep continuing to offer it. Later that night I get a phone call from that waiter, but it wasn’t about being bullied. Eleven months later, I’m now engaged to the waiter I protected that day.)

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