(While working a midweek shift, I’m informed by one of my cashiers that a person outside the store is attempting to sell his EBT benefits for cash on out lot. It’s been a rough day, so I decided to have a little fun. I change out of my uniform into my street clothes, and exit through the stockroom door of the store. Sure enough, a man on a bicycle approaches me as I round the corner of the store.)
Bike Guy: Hey, man, how’s it going?
Me: Good, man, good. You?
Bike Guy: Pretty good. Hey, listen, I have a question.
Me (feigning ignorance, acting confused): Oh? What’s that?
Bike Guy: Are you about to get some groceries?
Me (hoping he’ll admit to what’s he’s doing):…maybe..why do you ask?
Bike Guy: Well, I’m trying to make some cash and I have an EBT card, so I was hoping-
Me: Dude. You know I’m a manager here, right?
Bike Guy: Oh! No, I mean-
Me: And I’d hate to call the cops on you.
(Bike Guy still attempts to have me let him stay on the lot until I move to put out my cell phone. He then quickly gets on the bike a day rides off as fast as he can.)