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The Outer Limits Of Entertainment

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Customer: “Two for ‘Ice Age’, please.”

Me: “No problem. Did you want the 3-D showing at 2:15, or the regular, 2-D showing at 2:50?”

Customer: “What’s the difference?”

Me: “…thirty-five minutes, and a dimension.”

Infinitely Loopy But Happy As A Clam

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Me: “[Convenience store], how can I help you? ”

Caller: “Just wondering…what’s the soup special today?”

Me: “Clam chowder, sir. ”

Caller: “Are there any other soups or stews on?”

Me: “Not today, sir.”

Caller: “But do you have any soup or stew on special besides clam chowder today?”

Me: “Nope, just clam chowder. That’s our only soup special today.”

Caller: “But what about any other hot liquid foods? Any of those besides clam chowder?”

Me: “No, sir, just the chowder.”

Caller: “What’s your name?”

Me: “Lily, sir.”

Caller: “Lily, that’s a nice name. I’m Tim. I’m wondering if you have any soups on special today besides clam chowder?”

Me: “No, Tim, just the chowder.”

Caller: “Okay, thank you!” *hangs up*

(Not surprisingly, the phone rings again about a minute later.)

Me: “[Convenience store], how can I help you?”

Caller: “May I speak to Lily, please?”

Me: “This is Lily.”

Caller: “Hi Lily, it’s Tim. Do you have any soups besides clam chowder on special today?”

Me: “…”

Stupidity Is The Mother Of Repetition
Stupidity Is The Mother Of Repetition, Part 2
Laziness Is The Father Of Repetition

Ired By Shire Attire

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Customer: “Excuse me, can you help me choose which suit I should get?”

Me: “Certainly. This model here was worn by actor Sean Astin.”

Customer: “Who is that?”

Me: “He played in The Lord of the Rings. He was one of the hobbits.”

Customer: “You sell to hobbits!?”

Me: “Well, he’s not re–”

Customer: “You shouldn’t sell to hobbits!”