Category: Uncategorized

Jingle H*lls

| Minnesota, USA | Uncategorized

(An older woman and her husband approach me during the Christmas season.)

Me: “Hi, how can I help you today?”

Customer: “Yes, I’m looking for a baby Jesus for my nativity scene.”

Me: “I’m sorry ma’am. We’re currently out of baby Jesus.”

Customer: *to husband* “You hear that?! They’re all out of d*** baby Jesuses!”

Haute Cuisine In A Value Meal

| Manitoba, Canada | Uncategorized

Me: *in the drive-thru* “Hello, welcome to ****. What can I get for you today?”

Customer: “Yes, hi, I was just wondering, what are your apple slices?”

Me: “I’m sorry sir, I don’t understand the question. Are you asking for the price?”

Customer: “No, I want to know what they are. On the menu it says ‘apple slices’. What are they?”

Me: “They’re…slices of apple, sir.”

Customer: “That’s it?”

Me: “Yes sir.”

Customer: “Oh. I thought maybe they were something fancier than that. Never mind.”

The Building Block(heads) Of Life

| Durham, NC, USA | Uncategorized

Customer: “I’m looking for some school books.”

Me: “Alright, what sort of books are you looking for?”

Customer: *sigh* “Some chemistry guides, I guess.”

Me: “Alright, let’s head over and look at a few different guides.”

(I take her to the chemistry section of the bookstore.)

Customer: “I’m just not excited to be taking this course.”

Me: “Are you’re worried that it will be too difficult?”

Customer: “Oh, no! I just don’t want to be forced to learn about something I don’t believe in.”

Me: “Er…sorry? What’s your degree program?”

Customer: “I’m in vet school. I’ve already done all of my bio classes, and i really loved them, but I’m really not interested in learning about chemicals and how they harm the Earth and stuff.”

Me: “That’s not really what chemistry is about, you know.”

Customer: “What do you mean? Just look at the name: CHEM-istry. Like, CHEM-ical. As in, harmful to all life!”

Me: “But you said you enjoyed your biology courses, so why not your chemistry? They’re both really important sciences, especially for your major.”

Customer: “I just don’t get why I have to learn about chemicals and stuff! biology is different – that’s Mother Nature! Not some science that was made up in a lab.”

Me: “Well, think about what life is, when you break it down. What helps build life?”

Customer: “Biology.”

Me:” Right! Back up some now.”

Customer: “…Atoms?”

Me: “Now come back up a bit. After atoms, but before biology.”

Customer: *blank stare*

Me: “Chemistry! What happens when different atoms come together? Chemical reactions. That’s all part of chemistry. You can’t have biology without chemistry – it’s a natural part of life.”

Customer: *brightens up* “I had no idea! Now I can’t wait to take chemistry!”