Category: Transportation


Satellite Plight

| USA | Bad Behavior, Movies & TV, Transportation

Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]. My name is [My Name]. How can I assist you today?”

Customer: “I need you to realign my satellite.”

Me: “Well, sir, I can have a tech—”

Customer: “Are you f****** deaf?! I said I want you to realign my satellite!”

Me: “In order to do that, sir, I would need to get a tech out there, as your satellite dish is screwed onto your roof.”

Customer: “Don’t insult my f****** intelligence. I know you have a button over there to f****** realign it.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but I don’t have that.”

Customer: “You guys cut off my satellite because my landlords are getting divorced! You f****** purposely messed it up because of there stupid f****** divorce; I know it! That’s why it says searching for satellite on my screen!”

Me: “Sir, please stop yelling at me. I—” *customer hangs up*


Gets The Customers All Pumped Up

Bad Behavior, Technology, Transportation

(I’m working in a petrol station late at night. The area had just recovered from a power cut but it seems our section is still not back up yet. Customers coming in are very understandable about it. As I’m cleaning I see a regular trying to use a pump. I wave her in.)

Regular: “What is going on?!”

Me: “We’ve had a power-cut so none of the pumps are working.”

Regular: “Then why do you have lights on?”

Me: “We have a small generator outside that keeps the lights, alarm, and fridges on. They can’t power the pumps, I’m afraid.”

Regular: “Well, how can I get home?”

Me: “I don’t know. Sorry, without power there is no way I can get the fuel out.”

Regular: “But I need fuel now.”

(This continues for several minutes. Note, it’s my second-to-last week.)

Me: “Look unless we punch holes in the pumps you aren’t getting fuel.”

Regular: “How long will that take?”

Me: “I wasn’t serious. That would blow this place up. Look, I can’t give you fuel. There isn’t any electricity for the pumps to work. Please leave.”

(She carries on for another few minutes before she goes and stands with the pump in her car for 15 minutes. She eventually drives off with the pump still in her car, ripping it off. I phone the police who take all the details and leave. In the morning she comes back in.)

Regular: “Why can’t I use that pump? Don’t tell me you still aren’t working. I see others using it!”

Me: “That’s the one you broke last night. I’ve passed it to the police to deal with.”

(She goes white and silent for a few minutes before screaming and storms outs.)



Oil Try Again Somewhere Else

| San Antonio, TX, USA | Liars & Scammers, Popular, Transportation

(I’m selling my car to raise money for a move to Japan in 2011. I’ve found a prospective buyer and let her have a test drive. We’re getting to the time to change out money and car and she brings her husband who takes his time to go around the car.)

Husband: “We can’t pay your asking price for this.”

Me: “Why not?”

Husband: “It’s leaking oil, see?”

(Points under the car to where a small amount of liquid has discolored the pavement.)

Husband: “It’ll cost is too much to keep it running.”

Me: “That’s funny. It doesn’t use that much oil.”

Husband: “Well, we’ll still have to ask you to drop the price to [amount way lower than what will get me the money I need for the move].”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I can’t afford to go that low. I wouldn’t have enough money to get to my new job.”

Husband: “Well, the highest I can go would be [price that is still way too low].”

Me: “No. I think I’ll have call this off and find someone else, then.”

Husband: “Are you sure? You’re not going get it sold to anyone with that leak.”

Me: “Yeah, I think so. Sorry for wasting your time.”

(Husband and Wife look bewildered that I’m not willing to haggle but leave anyway. I take my car back to my parents’ home where I’m staying before heading to Japan.)

Father: “They were trying to scam you.”

Me: “It kinda felt like that, but how can you know?”

Father: “There’s no oil stains on our driveway. If you were leaking oil there’d be at least one.”

(I later had my mechanics look for leaks and they found none, saying the only liquid was coming from condensation. I took the car to a used car place and got about 90% of my asking price… more than double the best price the husband offered me. The used car place’s damage report only found cosmetic damage and found the engine and car itself to be in excellent condition. I am still in Japan.)


Must Love Those ‘Rush-To-The-Airport’ Scenes In Movies

| London, England, UK | Movies & TV, Tourists/Travel, Transportation

(I work in a cinema in Leicester Square, right in the heart of London’s West End. It is around midnight and a lady rushes in with several suitcases. Note that it’s 15 km to the nearest airport.)

Lady: “Is this the airport?”


Feeling Fuel-ish, Part 3

| UK | Bad Behavior, Transportation

(A young woman comes in to pay, while we can see her mother waiting in their car. In the UK, customers fill up their cars themselves, and then pay for the fuel.)

Customer: “£10 on pump six, please.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but there’s no fuel there. Are you sure that’s the correct pump?”

Customer: “Yes, I’m sure; it’s that red car.”

Me: “Well, there’s no fuel there. Perhaps she hasn’t fueled up yet?”

Customer: “I guess you’re right…”

(Five minutes later, she reaches the front of the queue again.)

Customer: “£10 on pump six?”

(I look out the window, the mother is still sitting behind the wheel of the car, and there’s still no fuel recoded on the pump.)

Me: “Uh… there’s still no fuel for you to buy.”

Customer: “What- still? This is unbelievable!”

(She leaves again. Shortly afterwards, we watch as the red car reverses away from pump six, then reverses towards a different pump, so it’s now facing the wrong way. The mother finally activates a fuel pump for us, fills up, and comes inside herself.)

Customer #2: *throws a £10 note on the counter* “£10 of fuel on pump seven, PLEASE!”

Me: “Uh, there’s £20 recorded on that pump. Are you sure that’s you?”

Customer #2: “Yes, I am SURE, and I am very annoyed, because I’ve been here for over 10 minutes now, and it took way too long for me to be able to fill up!”

Me: “I’m very sorry about that, but please be aware that it can take up to 20 seconds for the fuel to start flowing once you lift the nozzle. If you put it back in the cradle before it’s activated, then nothing will happen.”

Customer #2: “But I didn’t even touch anything! Why wasn’t the pump working? You need to put up a sign saying that your pump is out of order!”

Me: “I’m sorry. Are you saying you never actually placed the nozzle in your tank? You need to physically move the nozzle, or of course it won’t work.”

Customer #2: “Really? That’s a bit stupid; I don’t like it at all!”

Me: “This is how every filling station in the country operates, ma’am… I really don’t know what else to say?”

Customer #2: “Well, they don’t do it like this in Ireland, I can assure you! And I only have £10.” *indicates her daughter in the queue behind her* “She can pay the other half. There should be a sign!”

Feeling Fuel-ish, Part 2
Feeling Fuel-ish

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