Category: Transportation

Little Car, Big Idiot

| IL, USA | Extra Stupid, Transportation

Me: “Hello, sir, what can I do for you today?”

Customer: “I need wiper blades.”

Me: “For what kind of car?”

Customer: “Jeep.”

Me: “…What kind of jeep?”

(Blank stare.)

Me: “Is it a Cherokee, Wrangler, Patriot?”

Customer: “It’s one of the little ones.”

Tiring Of Your Tire-ing

| NC, USA | Transportation

(I used to run an auto repair garage and got calls like this all the time:)

Me: “Thank you for calling [My Shop]. How can I help you?”

Caller: “I need a price on a set of tires.”

Me: “Sure. What size?”

Caller: “I don’t know.”

Me: “No problem. What kind of car do you have?”

Caller: “I don’t know. It’s silver though.”

Me: “I’m going to need some vehicle information to price you a set of tires. Would you like to look at your car and call me back in a few mins?”

Caller: “Just give me an estimate. It doesn’t have to be exact.”

Me: “I really need to know what kind of car you drive. There are over 1700 individual tires on the market today. There’s no way I can give you a quote without knowing what you drive.”

Caller: “Just give me an estimate. I’m calling some other places to get quotes, too.”

Me: *end of my patience* “Okay, if you have a Geo Metro, figure around $300. If you have a Freightliner, about $10,000.”

Caller: “Okay, thank you.”

A Reversal Of Fortune

| Toronto, ON, Canada | Transportation

(I’m on a Landscape Lighting service call with another one of our technicians. We’re going back to a recent install to add more lights along the driveway. Talking to the client, we get more info on what he’s looking for.)

Client: “Yeah, I’d like more lights along the driveway so I can see to reverse my car at night.”

Service Tech: “That’s not a problem. We can have them added and running in a couple hours.”

Client: “Thanks, it’ll make a big difference. I like to think I’m better at reversing. I find it so much easier.”

(We get to work and the client leaves while we’re working. Note, we’ve parked our van in his driveway. We finish up and are sitting in the van filling in the paperwork.)

Me: “So, we put in four of the—”

(There is a loud thud as the van jolts.)

Client: *coming up to the driver’s window* “Sorry, I just backed into your van…”