Category: Transportation

The Day Has Taken An Upward Curve

, | Carson City, NV, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology, Transportation

(I work in the DMV phone room. A customer calls regarding a form she wants to fill out so she can get a duplicate copy of her registration certificate and decal. One of the lines on the form has blank spaces for the vehicle’s “Make”, “Model”, and “Body Type”, such as LS, LX, SE, Sport, etc. )

Customer: “I didn’t know what to put in the space for “Body Type.” I was tempted to write, ‘Curvy.'”

(I wish I had more customers like that!)

Has A License To Be An Idiot

| San Jose, CA, USA | Criminal & Illegal, Transportation

(I work in the service department of a car dealership. We are sometimes able to provide loaner vehicles to customers if the repairs needed on their vehicle fulfill certain requirements. If a customer uses a loaner vehicle they complete a contract similar to if they rent a car which requires us to see their driver’s license, proof of insurance, and a credit card. A customer has been told they qualify for a loaner vehicle needed after their vehicle was towed in for repairs and diagnosed. She barges in, looking grumpy.)

Customer: “I’m [Customer]; I’m here to pick up a loaner car.”

Receptionist: “No problem! We were expecting you so your advisor has already pulled up the vehicle; we’ll be able to get you on the road soon.”

Customer: *impatiently* “GOOD! I’m in a hurry. It is SO inconvenient that I had to come ALL the way here to pick up a car. I have things to do, you know!”

Receptionist: “We definitely understand; it’s tough when your car breaks down. We’re glad we can get you this loaner so at least you can get around again while your car is being fixed. I just need to see your driver’s license, proof of insurance, and a credit card so we can do your paperwork.”

Customer: “WHAT?! What do you mean you need to see that stuff?”

Receptionist: “…Are your documents in your car? We can have one of our porters get whatever is needed out of your vehicle.”

Customer: “NO! I didn’t bring any of those things because NOBODY TOLD ME I would need them! SOMEBODY SHOULD HAVE TOLD ME! THIS IS TOTALLY UNPROFESSIONAL!”

(One of my coworkers finishes with his customer and is tired of hearing her berate our receptionist, who has done nothing wrong. He approaches the desk.)

Coworker: “I’m sorry, ma’am, I couldn’t help but overhearing. It sounds like you were here to pick up our loaner vehicle but you don’t have your driver’s license or insurance information?”


Coworker: “Was someone else going to drive the loaner car?”


Coworker: “Ma’am… I’m pretty sure the State of California told you to bring your license and insurance with you EVERY time you plan to drive a car.”

Creating An International Incident

| Salt Lake City, UT, USA | Crazy Requests, Geography, Transportation

(I work at an Japanese car brand’s USA customer service center. Because of the differences in laws and regulations, there are actually several different companies – USA, Canada, Europe, etc.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Car Brand]. My name is [My Name]. How may I help you?”

Caller: “Yeah, I want to make complaint! I had to leave my car at the dealership overnight for maintenance and the next morning there was a big scratch in the paint along one side.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry to hear that! I will be happy to help you file a report. Where is the dealership? What city and state?”

Caller: “It’s in Tel Aviv.”

Me: “What state is that in?”

(There are lots of towns and cities in the USA named after places in other countries.)

Caller: “Oh, it’s not in the US. Tel Aviv is in Israel!”

Me: “In that case, sir, you’ve reached a wrong number. You need to call [Car Brand] of Israel to make your report.”

Caller: “I did! But I didn’t like their answer, so I decided to call you!”

Stupidity Amplified

| Indianapolis, IN, USA | Extra Stupid, Musical Mayhem, Transportation

(I work for an online music store, and often customers will call if they have any sort of problem with an order.)

Caller: “I purchased a very expensive amplifier head from your company. I am thinking about sending it back because it cuts in and out with sound while I play my guitar through it. I boxed it up and set it on my porch two nights ago, but no one has picked it up yet.”

Me: “When did you call us for a return authorization?”

Caller: “I didn’t. Why won’t someone just come pick it up?”

Wanted Proof But Got Overproof

| USA | Criminal & Illegal, Liars & Scammers, Transportation

(I work at a chain shipping store. One of my coworkers is helping an older woman who wants to ship a package to a friend. She has a box that is inside a plastic bag.)

Coworker: “Ma’am, is there anything breakable in your package?”

Older Woman: “Yes. It probably needs to be bubble wrapped but you can just bubble wrap the box.”

Coworker: “Okay, that’s not a problem! Can I just take the box out of the bag to make sure the item isn’t moving around inside the box?”

Older Woman: “Sure, that’s not a problem.”

(My coworker takes the box out of the bag and notices that the box says that it contains a bottle of Crown Royal. In our state you cannot ship hard liquor without a number of serious licenses.)

Coworker: “Ma’am, what’s inside this box?”

Older Woman: “Shampoo.”

Coworker: “Ma’am, are you sure?”

Older Woman: “Yes, it’s just shampoo.”

Coworker: “Ma’am, do you mind if I check to make sure its just shampoo?”

Older Woman: “Sure, that’s not a problem.”

(My coworker opens the box and pulls out a full bottle of Crown Royal.)

Coworker: “Ma’am, this is a bottle of Crown Royal. You can’t ship this. It’s against the law.”

Older Woman: “No. It’s shampoo!”

Coworker: “Ma’am, this ‘shampoo’ is 80 proof.”

(The older woman grabs the Crown Royal from my coworker and quickly exits the store.)

Coworker: *to me* “I want that kind of shampoo!”

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