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Category: Tourists/Travel

Fairness Is Limited

| Sydney, NSW, Australia | Bad Behavior, Extra Stupid, Tourists/Travel

(Customers have the option of buying a single-ride coupon or an unlimited rides ticket. It’s a particularly busy day, and the queue line on my ride is over 45 minutes long. The ride has just finished and most people are exiting, except for two customers.)

Me: “Hey, gentlemen, the exit is out that way, when you’re ready.”

Customer #1: “We’re staying on for another go.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but you will have to line up again to ride, especially since it’s so busy.”

Customer #2: “But we have these.” *shows me his unlimited rides ticket* “See, unlimited.”

Me: “Yes, you can go on multiple rides in the park, but you still have to line up every time. It’s only fair.”

Customer #2: “But we have these!”

Me: “As do most of the people in this queue, sir.”

(On cue, most of the guests in the queue started waving their tickets at the pair. They finally left.)

Their Own Private Joke

| Spain | Hotels & Lodging, Language & Words, Rude & Risque, Tourists/Travel

(This happens on a class trip to Spain after a girl realizes she left her comb at home.)

Girl: *walks up to front desk* “Do you have any combs?”

Employee: “No hablo Ingles.”

Girl: *in Spanish* “Necesito un pene, por favor.”

Employee: *laughs hysterically*

Girl: *angry* “Hey! Necesito un pene!” *pantomimes brushing hair*

Employee: *realizes what’s going on, takes out comb, and hands it to girl*

Girl: “Sí!”

Employee: “Ese es ‘un peine.'” *That’s ‘un peine.’* “Un pene es:” *points to his privates*

Girl: “Oh. S***!”

Can’t Even Save Their Own Skin

| NH, USA | Extra Stupid, Health & Body, Tourists/Travel

(I work in a doctor’s office, and am sitting in the nurses station during patient call-backs when I overhear this conversation:)

Nurse: “Hi, this is [Nurse] calling from [Doctor’s Office]. Is [Patient] there?”

Patient: “Yes, speaking.”

Nurse: “I’m calling to let you know that the results of your biopsy are in, and I’m afraid they came back as a skin cancer that needs to be addressed right away. Would you be able to come in for surgery on [date and time two days from now]?”

Patient: “Oh… um, I’m going on vacation then.”

Nurse: “This is a serious problem that needs to be taken care of as soon as possible. Is there any way you can push your vacation start back? You will be able to travel after your procedure without a problem.”

Patient: *getting angry* “Absolutely not! Do you know how much it will cost me to change my tickets? I’m going to Europe for a three month tour!”

Nurse: “You can’t be serious?! This is a cancer that will grow and spread and has the potential to become lethal. I strongly advise that you—”

Patient: “NO! I won’t hear it. You doctor types think that you all have a God complex! Not everything is life or death!”

Nurse: “This actually is! Please, if you can’t commit to an appointment today, call us and make one as soon as possible!”

Patient: “I’ll have nothing to do with this. I’ll get a second opinion! I’ve read the Internet and I know how often you people are wrong just to make an extra buck!” *slams the phone down, ending the call*

(The kicker? The procedure to remove the skin cancer would have taken less than an hour, and she would have been able to hop on her flight to Europe. In the time she said she’d be gone, her grade 2 cancer, which is treatable, had the potential to become a grade 3 or 4 cancer, which would greatly reduce her chances of having it successfully removed, and increase her risk of it spreading to other organs!)