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Category: Tourists/Travel

Won’t Get Her Pie In The Sky

| WA, Australia | Food & Drink, Tourists/Travel

(I work in an Australian department store which has a food hall. An elderly customer approaches our bakery which sells fresh cakes and pies.)

Customer: “Hello, dearie, I’d like a steak and kidney pie.”

Me: “Unfortunately, we don’t sell steak and kidney pies, but we do have a selection of others.”

(I proceed to read the selection to the customer.)

Customer: “I’ll have the beef and mushroom pie, then.”

Me: “Sure thing.”

Customer: “Can you pack it well? I want to take it on the plane.”

Me: “The plane?”

Customer: “Yes, I’m flying back to London today.”

Me: “You want to take a fresh pie with meat products in it on an international flight back to England?”

Customer: “Yes, of course.”

Me: “You can’t take food that isn’t sealed out of the country and into another one.”

Customer: “Of course I can. Just sell me the pie”

(I sold the customer the pie and I still wonder how far she made it before customs stopped her.)

They’re Un-bear-able

| Gatlinburg, TN, USA | Pets & Animals, Tourists/Travel

(My sister and I work in a store that is located in a tourist town just outside the Smoky Mountain National Park.)

Customer: “We want to see the bears.”

(Black bears are a very popular part of the wildlife in the National Park and area. They actually come to my house all of the time.)

Me: “Well, you can go up to Ober Gatlinburg where they have a bear pen.”

Customer: “Oh, no, we want to see them in the wild.”

Me: “That’ll be hard to arrange…”

Customer: “Say, what time do they let the bears out in the park?”

Me: “They don’t let them out. They are wild animals. They come whenever they want to.”

Customer: “Then how can we see them?”

Me: “Well, you could drive around Mt Leconte and get lucky. Or you could just leave your garbage out on your front porch and wait. They’ll come.”

Accentuating The Problem, Part Trois

| France | Language & Words, Tourists/Travel

(I’m on one of those 12-countries-in-8-days bus trip through Europe. Our group, mostly composed of Americans, pulls into a gift shop. Behind the counter, a young French girl, apparently new to the job, is excited to be able to practice her English. As a Canadian, it is also a chance for me to practice my French. We’ve been able to communicate pretty well and I tell her that her English is quite good. She is delighted.  An old Southern gentleman walks up the counter, places an item in front of the clerk.)

Customer: “Emma chizzit?” *how much is it?*

(The clerk just stares, crestfallen. She is not even sure that her customer is speaking English, much less what he means.)

Me: “Qu’elle prix?” *what price?*

(And the clerk bubbles back to life, able to answer the customer in, again, decent English!)

Related:

Accentuating The Problem, Part Deux
Accentuating The Problem