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Category: Tourists/Travel

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Tour Cried

| Bucharest, Romania | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Non-Dialogue, Tourists/Travel

In order to visit the Presidential Palace (former Royal Palace), you need to make a reservation at least two days earlier. My mother and I arrive on time and wait for the tour to start when an American family of three women and four children, all related, arrive. The first sign that this is going to be fun is that, despite the receptionist telling them about the rule, they make a scene about having traveled from far, wanting to visit, etc. The tour guide decides to bend the rules for the kids and agrees to take them on. Meanwhile, the children practically pick the Reception Hall apart. Since the museum is inside a functioning Government building, you are not permitted to leave the tour without announcing to the guide and waiting for an escort.

Kid #1, around 14 years old, the first chance she gets, takes her shoes off, lies down on the floor, and reads her book. Throughout the whole tour, not once did she look at the building or listen to the guide. But, hey. At least she was quiet, I guess. Still, would she have been allowed to do the same in the White House?

Kids #2 and #3, aged between eight and ten, make a point of touching every single item labeled with a “do not touch” sign.

And my personal favourite, Kid #4. The sweet little darling is about three, obviously way too young for a 100 minute-long tour. She is running around like crazy, getting behind the cordons, climbing up on the delicate historical furniture, while not a single adult from her family, including her own mother, pays ANY attention to her. After the tour guide pleads with the accompanying adults for the hundredth time, the little hellspawn’s mother drops this pearl, saying that Kid #4 doesn’t listen to her and that the kid will just scream if she tells the kid anything, so YOU do something about the kid. She then questioned why should she leave the tour when she paid for it?!

The poor guide, and every other visitor in our group — also paying customers — had to put up with an increasingly hysterical toddler and her entire entitled entourage for the rest of the visit, except the Royal Church. By that time, our guide had finally had enough and forbade them from entering. We asked her if we’d be allowed to buy her a drink on us after all the ordeal.

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You Will Be Ejected From The Building

| Wales, UK | Family & Kids, Tourists/Travel

(I work in an aviation museum, and like to have a little banter with visitors as they buy tickets.)

Me: “Thank you. Please mind your heads on low wingtips; there’s a few sharp edges here and there. Some of the aircraft, you can sit in the cockpits, but please keep your eye on the youngsters and don’t let them press the ejection seat button.”

Parent: “Ha ha, the insurance goes through the roof.”

Me: “No, sir, the kid goes through the roof.”

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Yellow-Stoney Faces

| Salt Lake City, UT, USA | Time, Tourists/Travel

(I am a busboy at a local high-end restaurant in Salt Lake City, Utah. It’s 15 minutes past closing time. I’m out cleaning tables, when suddenly I’m beckoned over by one of the last holdouts of the night. I notice they are all on their phones.)

Customer: “Excuse me! Can you get our server?”

Me: “Absolutely, ma’am. I’ll be just one second.”

(I run and grab their server, and go drop off the dishes I collected. On my way back out to the dining room, I run into the server, looking bemused.)

Me: “What did they want?”

Server: *deep sigh* “They wanted a map of Yellowstone Park.”

Me: *laughing* “Really?! They stayed 15 minutes past closing for that? What’d you tell them?”

Server: “I told them we don’t have any, and then they asked me where they could find one. I told them, ‘Probably at a gas station. In Wyoming.’ And they were like, ‘Oh! A gas station! Okay, we’ll go there. Thank you very much!’”

Me: *laughing harder* “Yeah, or they could’ve just found one on the phones they had out in front of their freaking faces.”

Server: “No kidding!”

Me: “Did they tip you well?”

Server: “Not really.”

Me: “F*** them. I hope they never find Yellowstone.”

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Too Early To Deal With Each Other’s Baggage

| CA, USA | Popular, Technology, Tourists/Travel

(I have an early flight, and have been up since 5 am. Needless to say, I’m pretty out of it. After having some issues checking in, I finally ask for help.)

Me: “Excuse me, but this thing isn’t letting me check a bag.”

Employee: *gives me an odd look* “Well, that machine is a carry-on only one… It says so across the top.”

Me: *looking down immediately, where it says in bold letters “CARRY-ON ONLY”; needless to say, I turn bright red* “Oh, my god, I did not see that. I’m so stupid…”

Employee: *laughs* “That’s all right. Let me check your bag.” *types on the computer* “All right, I need your ID and a credit card.”

Me: “Sure.” *I hand both over*

Employee: *leaves for a moment before coming back, her head down and a self-deprecating smile on her face* “And I just tried to charge you for a free bag…”

Me: *laughs* “Well, I tried to check a bag on a carry-on only machine, so I think we’re even!”

(She was very helpful and nice for the rest of the exchange, and I left for my flight in a much better mood than when I arrived.)

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Drowning In Interruptions

| USA | Bad Behavior, Tourists/Travel

(I work at a waterpark that provides tubes with bottoms for young children. The tubes are given out by request at guest services, but normally by the middle of the day there are lots of children’s tubes laying around because people have left them behind. This happens literally a minute after the park opened.)

Guest: *storms up to us* “Where are all the kiddie tubes?”

Coworker: “Oh, you can get one at—”

Guest: “Where are they? Yesterday, there were lots of them in the water! Now there are none! My daughter needs one! She’s only three!”

Coworker: “Yes, of course, sir. Since we’ve just opened you can get one at—”

Guest: “No one here knows anything! This place is run by a bunch of stupid kids! Does anyone know where the d*** tubes are?”

Me: “Sir, you can get a child tube at guest services. It’s just around the corner. We just opened, so none of the child tubes are in the water. You can get a life vest for your daughter there, too, if she needs one.”

Guest: “Thank you. At least someone knows something. And you should report him to your supervisor for being an idiot!” *walks off*

Me: *to my coworker* “Yeah, I’m not going to report you.”

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