Category: Top

The Count Would Be Proud

, | Eugene, OR, USA | Top

(A customer bursts into the store and slams a bag of food onto the counter and immediately starts yelling.)

Customer: “I ordered six hamburgers and I only got…”

(The customer starts pulling the burgers out one by one counting them loudly for the whole store to hear.)

Customer: “ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE!”

(Her face turns bright red as she realizes her error.)

Customer: “…six.”

(The customer quickly throws the burgers back into the bag and runs out of the store.)

Touch Of A Racist

| Northglenn, CO, USA | Top, Uncategorized

Customer: “Where’s that toaster made? China?”

Me: “Yes, sir, it’s made in China. Why do ask?”

Customer: “I knew it! You should be ashamed of yourself, selling dirty merchandise!”

Me: “Dirty? It’s never been used.”

Customer: “The orientals touched it. It’s dirty.”

Me: “Sir, I’m Chinese. I shook your hand when you walked in the door.”

Customer: “S***!”

Friends In Unusual Places

| New Zealand | Crazy Requests, Top

Me: “How can I help you today?”

Customer: “I’m looking for a parcel.”

Me: “May I have your tracking number, please?”

Customer: “My what?”

Me: “Your tracking number. All of our parcels have tracking numbers which the sender can give you if you do not have it.”

Customer: “Why don’t you have it?”

Me: “Because I didn’t send you the parcel.”

Customer: “So, who did then?”

Me: “Sir, do you not know who sent you the item?”

Customer: “No, but my neighbor just had something delivered and I want one too. So send me something now!”

(The caller then muffles the phone and I can hear what sounds like sobs.)

Me: “Sir, are you okay?”

Customer: “I’m so lonely and I just wanted to get a present!” *more sobbing*

Customer: “I’m so lonely!”

Me: *speechless*

Customer: “Never mind, I’ll go now…”

Me: “Sir…wait. We do have a parcel for you. I just need to confirm your address to send it to you. It will be there this afternoon!”

(After he gives me his address, I have a quick whip around the call center and we get a card signed by the team, put in a few chocolate bars with other happy bits and pieces, and send it to him. He calls the next day and thanks us all. Now, he rings once a week on average, and we are all happy to chat with him.)

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