Category: Top

Dumb Without Shadow Of A Doubt

| Manchester, UK | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Top

(I’m putting the salad on a customer’s sandwich.)

Customer: “What’s that black thing on there?”

(I check to see if I’ve put olives on the sandwich by mistake.)

Me: “What black thing?”

Customer: “That big black thing right there!”

(I check again.)

Me: “Erm, that’s the shadow of my hand.”

Customer: “I don’t want that. Take it off!”

Me: *moves hand*

Customer: “That’s better.”

For Some, Childhood Never Ends, Part 5

| British Columbia, Canada | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Top

(A young man in his early 20s approaches the counter. He is dressed very much like a typical frat boy.)

Me: “Hi, welcome to [ice cream parlor]! What can I get for you today?”

Customer: “Yeah, can I get cotton candy and cake batter ice cream mixed together? And when you put it in the bowl, can you put the cone on top like a hat and make a smiley face out of gummy bears?”

Me: “Awww, sure! Who’s it for?”

Customer: *quite seriously* “Me!”

Me: “Awesome.”

Related:
For Some, Childhood Never Ends, Part 4
For Some, Childhood Never Ends, Part 3
For Some, Childhood Never Ends, Part 2
For Some, Childhood Never Ends

A Bad Run For Their Money

| Minnesota, USA | Criminal & Illegal, Top, Underaged, Wild & Unruly

(My coworker is serving a group of five teenaged guys. All are very loud, obnoxious, and annoying. They don’t order a lot of food, and finally get up to leave. I am putting in an order then this happens…)

Coworker: *to me* “THEY ARE RUNNING! THEY ARE RUNNING!”

Me: “Did you get the license plate number?!”

Coworker: “Yeah, right after the last guy paid, I noticed there was still one seat open with just a short stack of pancakes. I asked the guy’s friend if his friend was coming back to pay. He turned beet red, said “Yeah,” and that he would go get him. The car already was backed up and waiting when he walked out the door so I went to get the plate numbers quick.”

Me: “Okay, give me the numbers. I’ll call it in.”

(I call the police and give them the license plate and description of the car. About five minutes later, an officer shows up and gets a description of the guy who walked out on his bill. He says they may have the kids, and he will get the money for us. Ten minutes later, the officer shows up again.)

Officer: “Here is the money for the bill. His friends had to pay for it so he wouldn’t get a ticket.”

Me: “I was hoping you would have brought him up here to face his crime.”

Officer: “Normally, that is what I would do. However, when we pulled them over for not paying the bill, we noticed the smell of alcohol. They are currently getting minors for underage drinking.”

(In Minnesota, the fine for underaged drinking is $200. In the end, four of them were under age and drinking and got tickets for it. The bill he walked out on was only $4.55!)