Category: Time

It’s Just Not Your Day

| London, England, UK | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Time

(A customer runs in through the door in an obvious state of distress.)

Me: “Hello, can I help you? Do you have an appointment?”

Customer: “WHAT DAY IS IT!?”

Me: “[Date].”

Customer: “WHAT DAY?!”

Me: “Wednesday…?”

Customer: *weeping in obvious terror* “MAKE IT NOT BE!”

Me: “How… how would I make it not be Wednesday?”

Customer: “MAKE IT BE TUESDAY! PLEASE!”

Me: “I… can’t. I’m sorry.”

(The customer ran outside, screaming. I found out later that he was going to lose his house if he didn’t make a payment by Tuesday, and he’d forgotten to. I’m still not sure how I was supposed to time-travel for him, though.)

Won’t Be Party To Your Crazy Requests

| NY, USA | Crazy Requests, Time

(A customer comes in a few minutes after we open at 10 am. He spends half an hour looking around and photographing items. Then he approaches the counter where I’m processing new inventory.)

Customer: “What time do you close?”

Me: “6:30 pm.”

Customer: “No, today. What time do you close today?”

Me: “6:30 pm.”

Customer: “But it’s Saturday.”

Me: “Right.”

Customer: “I have a party until 7. Will you be open after 7?”

Me: “I’m afraid not; we close at 6:30.”

Customer: “Well, that’s just ridiculous.”

Me: “Could I help you find something right now, while you’re here?”

Customer: “I want to buy some things but I don’t want to take them to the party.”

Me: “Well, you could purchase them now and pick them up another day at your convenience!”

Customer: “No, I don’t want to do that.”

Me: “We have two other locations; maybe you’ll be closer to [Location #1] or [Location #2]?”

Customer: “No, I never go there.”

Me: “You can always stop back in another day and purchase your items.”

Customer: “No, I want them today.”

Me: “Well… I’m afraid I’m out of suggestions.”

Customer: “So, you don’t want my business?”

Me: “I would love to help you, if you want to purchase your items while the store is open.”

Customer: “So you’re not going to help me?”

Me: “I’m not sure what you want me to do?”

Customer: “How about I get your phone number and you come let me in when I’m done with my party?”

Me: “…no.”

Customer: “Well, I guess you don’t want my business.”

Me: “I guess not.”

(He left.)

Your Counting Skills Are Week

| NJ, USA | Holidays, Time

(I work for a men’s clothing store that also rents tuxedo formal wear. If a customer rents a product less than a week from their event date there is an extra rush charge added on to the order, similar to that of an expedited shipped online order. The rental product is not kept on premises and is shipped to the store, and so we have to follow certain time frames for both the product being put together and UPS delivery schedules. A mother, grandmother, and two kids walk into the store on a Saturday afternoon.)

Me: “Hello, how may I help you today?”

Mother: “Yes, I would like to rent a tux for my son, for Halloween.”

Me: “Perfect. We have a wide selection of options to pick from. The pricing of the rental ranges from [price #1] to [price #2], depending on which one you pick out. But I just want to let you know there is also a [price #3] additional rush charge fee since Halloween is less than a week away.”

Mother: *rolls eyes* “Ugh! Really? We’ve rented from here before; is that really necessary?”

Me: “Well, I do apologize, but Halloween is this coming Friday which is less than a week from today.”

Grandmother: *cuts me off* “No, that’s not right.”

Me: “Ma’am, today is Saturday. A week from today is next Saturday. This coming Friday is Halloween, which is six days from today.”

Grandmother: “No, you’re confused!”

Me: “The rental is for Halloween right? This coming Friday?”

Mother: “Yes.”

(I count in front of them on hands, Sunday, Monday, Tuesday… etc. until I get to Friday which is six days.)

Grandmother: “You’re counting wrong!”

Mother: “This is ridiculous that you are trying to charge us extra for no reason.”

(At that point I was beyond frustrated with them and with trying to prove that Halloween was in fact six days from that day and that falls under seven-days for the rental rush charge. The family proceeded to leave the store and didn’t come back.)

These Customers Come At All Hours

| FL, USA | Bad Behavior, Liars & Scammers, Time

Me: “Thank you for calling [Store]. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, I’ve been waiting for over an hour! Where’s my pizza?”

Me: “It’s on its way, sir.”

Customer: “Well, what are you going to do about it?”

Me: “About what, sir?”

Customer: “I’ve been waiting for over an hour!”

Me: “We won’t be doing anything. There’s no way you’ve waited that long.”

Customer: “WHAT?! ARE YOU CALLING ME A LIAR?!”

Me: “No, sir, just mistaken.”

Customer: “And why’s that?!”

Me: “It’s 11:20, sir—”

Customer: “So?!”

Me: “We open at 10:30.”

Customer: *click*

They Have No Closing Arguments

| AB, Canada | Bad Behavior, Time

I do the morning show at a radio station. Because we’re in a small town and have a small staff, we close our offices at noon. I give away tickets to a concert that night, and tell the winner that she has to be at the station before noon to pick up the tickets. She says that she can’t make it by noon, but can be there shortly after noon, and asks that we stay open late to accommodate her. I ask her how late she’ll be, and she says just a few minutes after 12:00…12:15 at the latest. Since I can wait around a few minutes, I say we’ll stay open late for her.

12:15. She’s not here yet. 1:00 pm. She’s not here yet. 2:00. She’s not here yet. 3:00. I’m still waiting for her. I’ve also been at work since four am and hadn’t eaten anything all day. I decide to close up for a few minutes and run across the street to the store to grab something. I come back at 3:10 to find an angry note taped to the door. Sure enough, it’s from our contest winner, calling us a bunch of lying SOBs for saying we’d stay open late for and then not doing so, and calling us various other nasty names.

Ever since then, I’ve made no more exceptions for contest winners who’ll be “just a few minutes late.” If you can’t make it by closing time, tough.

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