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Category: Technology

The realm of Technical Support is there to provide expert assistance to those who are not so tech-savvy. Although they still expect you to know what a computer is, and how to turn it on, and to know that you can’t ‘fix the internet’ because it isn’t pretty enough. You have been warned…

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It’s Madden-ing

| OH, USA | Technology, Time

(I’m talking with my friend over the Internet. He works at a video game store, and at the time of the conversation it is exactly one day before the latest Madden NFL game is released.)

Friend: “You know, the week before Madden is always a fun time for the phone. Every five minutes, the phone rings, we say ‘[Store]. Madden comes out tomorrow. How can I help you?’ and they ask, ‘Do you have Madden?’ Every f***in’ time.”

Me: “Hah.”

(He pauses for a while.)

Friend: “Either that, or they just hang up.”

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Locked On Numbers

| UAE | Extra Stupid, Technology

(I work in a gaming centre in the Middle East. Each of our customers has a username and a password. One day a customer comes in and sits in front of a computer and, after about five seconds, he calls me in a very urgent tone.)

Customer: “[My Name]!”

Me: “Yes, sir, do you have any problems?”

Customer: “I can’t login. I am not able to type my password. Your keyboard is broken. Change it.”

(I type some alphabets in the password field and it seems to work fine.)

Customer: “My password is a number. I am not able to type numbers. Your keyboard is broken. Change it.”

(I type the numbers that are above the alphabets in the keyboard and again it works fine.)

Customer: *points to the number pad in the keyboard* “I am not able to type numbers from here. Your keyboard is broken. Change it.”

(I notice the number lock is off. I switch it on and start typing using the number pad.)

Customer: *blank stare*

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Email Fail, Part 8

| HI, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

Me: “All right, Mr. [Customer]. Your flight date change has been confirmed and issued a new ticket for. All I need to do is to send you an email, so let me verify the email address on file.” *reads back his Gmail address*

Customer: “No, no, no! That one is in Maui. I’m in Honolulu right now; I’ll give you another one.”

Related:
Email Fail, Part 7
Email Fail, Part 6
Email Fail, Part 5

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Not Getting The Signal

| Austin, TX, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Technology

(I’m in the boarding area of an airport with my friends. I’m using my phone’s personal hotspot to share WiFi with my friends when a lady comes up to me. Keep in mind that my hotspot has a password, like any other, to keep people from using my data.)

Lady: “Give me the password to your WiFi!”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Lady: “I know you have WiFi! Give me the password!”

Me: “Sorry, but that’s my hotspot–”

Lady: “GIVE ME IT!”

Me: “Ma’am. You do not understand. THIS. IS. MY. WIFI. I’m not giving you my password.”

Lady: “Fine! I’ll just get you fired for hogging the WiFi!”

Me: “Good luck, because I don’t work here!”

(My friends and I think that that’s the end of her. But only five minutes later, she brings a manager over to “get me fired.”)

Lady: “See!? That’s him! He won’t give me the WiFi password!”

Manager: “Ma’am, first, I don’t know him because he doesn’t work here. Therefore, I can’t fire him. Second, our airline’s WiFi is free.”

Lady: “But…”

Manager: “Third, I’m sure he is using his own hotspot’s WiFi, so you’re just trying to get free WiFi from him.”

Lady: “So make him give me the password!”

Manager: “No.”

Lady: “Excuse me?”

Manager: “I said no, if you didn’t hear me.”

Lady: “THE CUSTOMER’S ALWAYS RIGHT!”

Manager: “Well, in this case, you certainly are not.”

Lady: *speechless*

Manager: “Now, are you going to go back to your seat to leave these POLITE flyers alone, or do I have to get security to escort you out of here?”

Lady: *looks at me, then to the manager, then back to me, then turns 50 shades of red and clambers back into her seat*

Manager: *to me* “Well, I bet she won’t bother you anymore!”

(Later we got the best seats for being polite and not causing a commotion, and I spotted her sitting between two bratty kids!)

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That’s One For The Log

, | PA, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

(I work in a call center for a financial institution; I receive some pretty interesting phone calls. I’m paranoid about submitting too many and getting fired, but I thought this small one might be funny.)

Me: “Thank you for calling customer service. [My Name] speaking. How may I help you?”

Caller: *says immediately without pulling up his account information* “I’m looking at my login ID screen.”

Me: *silence to make sure I don’t interrupt him, expecting to hear more about the problem* “Okay. How may I help you?”

Caller: “I can’t log in.”

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