Category: Technology

The realm of Technical Support is there to provide expert assistance to those who are not so tech-savvy. Although they still expect you to know what a computer is, and how to turn it on, and to know that you can’t ‘fix the internet’ because it isn’t pretty enough. You have been warned…

The Tale Ends With A Twist

| GA, USA | Technology

(I’m working customer service. Two older ladies approach my desk with a tension rod, for curtains, which adjusts to the width of the window.)

Customer #1: “I need to return this. It doesn’t work.”

Me: “All right, do you have your receipt?”

(Customer #1 hands me the receipt, then answers a call on her cell, so her friend steps in.)

Customer #2: “She really just wants to exchange it for one that works. It just doesn’t extend, see?”

(Customer #2 pulls on the end of the rod in an attempt to make it extend. Nothing happens.)

Me: “Hmm, that’s odd. Let me take a look.”

(I take the rod and gently tug on it. Nothing happens, so I twist it… Lo and behold, it starts extending. In the meantime, Customer #2 has turned around to talk to Customer #1, who is still on the phone.)

Me: *with rod several feet longer than original length* “So how long did you need it to be?”

(Both ladies turn around and stare in wonder.)

Both: “How did you DO that?”

Me: “You just have to twist it. Did you still need to exchange it, or will this one be fine?”

Customer #1: “I didn’t think to TWIST it! Thank you! Yes, this one will be fine!”

(They were both super nice, and gave me a good laugh, especially the look on their faces when I got it to work.)

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 44

, | SC, USA | Extra Stupid, Money, Technology

Customer: “I have your mobile app… I know I can take a picture of a check and make a deposit that way. But I want to know how to make a mobile withdrawal…”

Me: “You want to know if you can make a mobile withdrawal?”

Customer: “Yes. I can’t figure out any way to do that.”

Me: “Well, sir, there is no way to do that because you would have to go to an ATM or into a branch to get actual cash.”

Customer: “But I’m not at an ATM and your branch is closed. I want to deposit this check through the app and get cash right now.”

Me: “Well sir, frankly, technology hasn’t gotten to the point where mobile phones can print – and even at that, printing money, unless done by the government, is illegal.”

Customer: “So I can’t make a mobile withdrawal?”

Me: “No, sir.”

Customer: “That’s stupid.” *click*

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 43
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 42
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 41

Credited With Having No Children

| Canberra, ACT, Australia | At The Checkout, Rude & Risque, Technology

Me: “Enter your PIN, sir.”

(He does, and then removes card straight away, not waiting for the machine.)

Me: “Sir, it looks like you pulled out early—”

Customer: “Story of my life! It’s why I don’t have kids.”

(The next customer and I burst out laughing.)