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Category: Technology

The realm of Technical Support is there to provide expert assistance to those who are not so tech-savvy. Although they still expect you to know what a computer is, and how to turn it on, and to know that you can’t ‘fix the internet’ because it isn’t pretty enough. You have been warned…

Taxing Faxing, Part 16

| SC, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

Me: “Thank you for calling [Law Firm]; this is [My Name].”

Client: “I need to speak to [My Boss].”

Me: “I’m sorry, she is on the phone. May I help you?”

Client: “No, I really need her.”

Me: “Okay. She may be a minute. Are you sure I can’t help you?”

Client: “No, I need her fax number. I’ll hold for her.”

Me: “Uh, I can give that to you.”

Related:
Taxing Faxing, Part 15
Taxing Faxing, Part 14
Taxing Faxing, Part 13

You’re Only Free To Leave

| Bridgeport, CT, USA | Crazy Requests, Technology

Me: “Hi there, welcome to [Store]. How can I help you today?”

Customer: “I would like to return this. It works fine. Just don’t want it anymore.”

Me: “Okay, let me just take a quick at the receipt see how you paid. Oh… I’m sorry, sir, this is three months outside of the return policy. I won’t be able to take it back. Is it defective?”

Customer: “What? No. So? It works. Where does it say the return policy?”

Me: “Here, there, there, and it was emailed to you. I can’t take it back being so outside the return policy and it being opened.”

Customer: “I am never shopping here again!”

Me: “Okay… sorry to hear that.”

Customer: “I will accept a free store credit for the trouble so I can buy a charger.”

Me: “No, I can’t give you a free store credit; I’m sorry.”

Customer: “This is just ridiculous! I can’t believe I can’t get free stuff here!”

Networking Not Working

| Denver, CO, USA | Technology

(I work in the electronics department of a store. Each of us there has some expertise in what we sell, but we aren’t required to be walking encyclopedias of the entire department. A woman and her husband walk up to me to ask a question.)

Woman: “Excuse me.”

Me: “Yes, how may I help you?”

Woman: “I’d like to buy a wifi router.”

Me: *gestures at aisle* “They’re right down that way, miss.”

(Woman remains where she is, glaring at me.)

Me: “Was there something else?”

Woman: “Aren’t you going to give me any suggestions or help me set it up?”

Me: *smiles sheepishly* “Well, I would, miss, but I don’t really know how to set up a wifi network.”

Woman: *getting irritated* “You’ve never set up a wifi network before?”

Me: “Nope.”

Woman: “And you’re working in electronics?”

Me: “Yup.”

Woman: “How can you not know how to set up a wifi network?”

Me: “Never done it before.”

Woman: *not bothering to conceal her irritation at this point* “So how can you work in the electronics department if you don’t even know how to set up a wifi network?”

Me: *shrugs* “I don’t know, but I also work over in fabrics. Would it surprise you to know that I can’t stitch a quilt?”

(The woman was speechless, and her husband doubled over laughing.)