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Category: Technology

The realm of Technical Support is there to provide expert assistance to those who are not so tech-savvy. Although they still expect you to know what a computer is, and how to turn it on, and to know that you can’t ‘fix the internet’ because it isn’t pretty enough. You have been warned…

They Lost The Game

| Canada | Extra Stupid, Technology

(Customer comes up to the counter with a Nintendo Amiibo figure of Sonic.)

Customer: “Hi, do you know which games this figure is compatible with?”

Me: *pulls up a list* “It works with Super Smash Bros for Wii U and 3DS, Super Mario Maker, and Mario Kart 8.”

Customer: “What about Sonic Generations?”

Me: “Sorry, that game is on the Xbox 360; Amiibo figures only work on the Nintendo WiiU and New 3DS.”

Customer: “Well, I have a portable NFC reader.”

Me: “Again, that only works on the 3DS or 2DS.”

Customer: “I don’t see any reason why it wouldn’t work on my Xbox 360.”

Me: “The Xbox 360 and Nintendo Wii U/3DS are made by totally different companies.”

Customer: “But they’re both video game consoles.”

Me: *takes a deep breath* “Sir, the Xbox 360 is made by Microsoft and the Wii U and 3DS are both made by Nintendo. Microsoft and Nintendo don’t work together on game consoles and the two consoles don’t even play the same games.”

Customer: “But I’ve seen Sonic on both consoles.”

Me: “Yes, but Sonic Generations has never been on a Nintendo console, let alone the WiiU or 3DS. Even if it was, there’s no guarantee the Sonic amiibo would work with it.”

(Customer has blank stare.)

Customer: “Wait, what if I put the Sonic Generations disc in a Wii U?”

Me: “Nothing would happen.”

Customer: “Oh.” *walks away*

Me: “Next, please.”

(Another customer comes up to the counter with a copy of ‘Fallout 4’ for the Xbox One.)

Other Customer: “Does this work on mobile?”

Me: “Sorry, I’m going on break…”

Not Very Open Minded, Part 14

| Kent, England, UK | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Technology

(I work on the customer service desk of a large, busy retail store. We open later on Sundays, at 11 am. Our opening times are clearly signposted on the doors. It’s around 10 am and although we’ve raised the metal shutters on our storefront we haven’t yet unlocked the doors, and are still setting up for the day. The customer bangs on the door, causing me to look up from my paperwork. I shake my head and point to the sign.)

Me: “We’re not open yet, sorry!”

(Customer continues to bang on the door, then with an almighty shove manages to actually break it down.)

Customer: “I want to do a return!”

Me: “Uh… you just BROKE our door. We aren’t open!”

Customer: “Right, whatever. So I need to return these picture frames. Here’s my receipt…”

Me: “I can’t return them. Our tills aren’t on, and even if they were our office team hasn’t put the cash drawers in. You have to wait until 11 am.”

Customer: “What? You’re telling me I can’t return these? Why aren’t your tills on yet?”

Me: “We’re not open. We open at 11 am. Our opening times are on the sign outside. See?”

Customer: “What? So I can’t return them?”

Me: “You can, but you need to wait another hour. The tills aren’t on. The store isn’t open. I physically can’t give you your money back yet.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous! This is dreadful customer service; I’m never coming back here again!”

(She stormed out in a huff, leaving me confused, bewildered, and with the task of fixing the doors back up before we open.)

Related:
Not Very Closed Minded, Part 13
Not Very Closed Minded, Part 12
Not Very Closed Minded, Part 11

Customer Ignorance Is Soda Pressing

, | Payson, UT, USA | Technology

(I overhear this between an employee and a customer.)

Customer: “So, what is so great about this smartphone?”

Employee: “Well, it’s waterproof and—”

Customer: “Waterproof? There is no such thing!”

Employee: “I can assure you—”

Customer: “Prove it.”

(As I listen to this, the employee proceeds to dip it in the guy’s soda.)

Employee: “See, it works.” *proceeds to pull it back out and show that it works*

Customer: “Well, umm… the customer is always right!”

Just Type In ‘Born Yesterday’

, | Lansing, MI, USA | At The Checkout, Technology

(Whenever we access a customer’s account, they need to give us their pin number.)

Me: “All right, now, what’s your eight-digit pin number?”

Customer: “I don’t know… Oh! It’s my birthday!”

Me: *looking at them expectantly*

Customer: *looking at me expectantly*

Me: “aaannndddd what would that be?”

Wish You Could Screen These Customers

| Australia | Popular, Rude & Risque, Technology

(Our store has a large screen relaying live footage from the CCTV cameras. Every so often, customers who are easily entertained go crazy about ‘seeing themselves on TV’ and start dancing in front of it, or taking pictures, or whatever. We had just served this trio of guys when they noticed the screen and one started dancing. The next moment I looked at him he had his pants down to his knees and was doing what you could only describe as “windmilling,” while thrusting towards my horrified looking coworker.)

Me: “It’s not going to look any larger on the big screen…”

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