icon_technology

Category: Technology

The realm of Technical Support is there to provide expert assistance to those who are not so tech-savvy. Although they still expect you to know what a computer is, and how to turn it on, and to know that you can’t ‘fix the internet’ because it isn’t pretty enough. You have been warned…

Buttbox

| Avon, CT, USA | Rude & Risque, Technology, Theme Of The Month

Me: “Thank you for calling [Retail Store]. How may I assist you?”

Young Male Caller: “Yeah, do you guys got any purple XBox’s?”

Me: *not sure if prank or real* “No. I’m sorry, sir, but there are a lot of online sites that offer custom paint jobs for consoles!”

Young Male Caller: “Well, do you think they would be able to put a picture of my butt on one?”

Me: *now convinced it’s a prank* “Well, I’m not sure if the image will fit but I’m sure they can try!”

Young Male Caller: *click*

Needs To Do Some More Internet Exploring

| VA, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

(A customer calls in about not being able to access our website. While troubleshooting this exchange happens:)

Me: “Okay, ma’am, after you’re done clearing your browsing history can I get you to close out of your browser to refresh it.”

Customer: “Now this won’t kick you out will it?”

Me: “I’m sorry, I’m not sure I understand your question.”

Customer: “When I close off your website, will I lose my connection with you? Because I was on hold a really long time.”

Me: “So… you’re asking that if you close out of the site on your computer it will hang our phone call?”

Customer: “YES!”

Me: “Ma’am, I can absolutely guarantee you closing your browser will not hang up your phone.”

Customer: “Oh, thank goodness, because I really didn’t want to have to call back and be on hold again.”

Something Stinks About The Address

| Orem, UT, USA | Language & Words, Rude & Risque, Technology

(As cashiers, we’re required to ask for emails at the end of a purchase. Customers can decline, and it’s no problem for us to bypass the email capture screen. I’ve just finished up ringing a young woman and her boyfriend.)

Me: “Perfect, we’re almost done! Could I just enter your email?”

Customer: “Sure. It’s [email protected]

Me: *typing it in without thinking* “All right, if you could just verify the email below on the card reader— oh.”

Boyfriend: *snickers*

Me: “I guess that’ll be a ‘no, thank you’ on the email then…”