icon_technology

Category: Technology

The realm of Technical Support is there to provide expert assistance to those who are not so tech-savvy. Although they still expect you to know what a computer is, and how to turn it on, and to know that you can’t ‘fix the internet’ because it isn’t pretty enough. You have been warned…

A Development For The Lesser Developed

| Manila, Philippines | Awesome Workers, Bigotry, Technology

(I am a technical support person for an ISP in Australia. Customers often ask us where the calls are routed to. They really don’t mind as long as you help them but this one is just different. After walking an irate customer through the troubleshooting steps:)

Customer: “Where is this call routed to?”

Me: “Your call has been routed here in the Philippines.”

Customer: *in a rude tone* “So, I’m basically talking to a monkey?”

Me: “Yes, sir. A monkey who’s teaching you how to use your pocket wifi.”

Customer: “…” *click*

Unable To Channel The Caller

| Canada | Extra Stupid, Technology

(I work tech support for the Internet part of a company that also provides cable TV and cell phones, so sometimes we get calls meant for other departments. When that happens, we just transfer them over. One day I get a call from an older, heavily-accented caller.)

Me: “Thanks for choosing [Company] Internet tech support. What can I do for you today?”

Customer: “My weather network, and the news, and, uh… it no work!”

Me: “Your Internet isn’t working?”

Customer: “No! Not Internet. TV! My weather channel isn’t working! And the news channel!”

Me: “Oh, your cable TV isn’t working!”

Customer: “”Right!”

Me: “I’m sorry to hear that! Well, you’ve reached Internet tech support, so let me get you right over to cable TV repair, and they’ll be able to look into that for you. Before I get you to them, do you have any Internet questions for me while you have me here?”

Customer: “Yes!”

Me: “Yes?”

Customer: “My weather channel isn’t working!”

Me: “Okay, well, then, let me get you right over to cable TV repair then. This will just put you back into hold while I get you to them. There may be just a brief wait–”

Customer: “Wait!”

Me: “Yes?”

Customer: “My news channel isn’t working!”

Me: “Well, that’s still on your TV, so let’s get you right over to the right department–”

Customer: “Wait!”

Me: “Yes?”

Customer: “My weather channel isn’t working either!”

Me: “Okay, well-let-me-get-you-right-over-to-the-right-guys-they’ll-be-with-you-in-just-a-sec-bye!” *hits transfer button*

It’s Better Than Just Using ‘Password’

| Malvern, PA, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

(Working on an internal IT help desk, we have a customer who calls once to twice a week because he has forgotten his password to the network or custom programs.)

Customer: “My d*** computer is broken again!”

Coworker: “Okay, [Customer], are you having trouble getting into the computer or into a program?”

Customer: “I can’t do anything! I type in my password and the d*** thing won’t take it!”

Coworker: “Okay, I’ll reset your password.”

(I reset the password and leave it blank, as usual).

Coworker: “All right, I’ve reset your password. Go ahead and try to log in now.”

Customer: “What should I use for a password?”

Coworker: “No password.”

Customer: “Is there a space in that or is it all one word?”