Category: Spouses & Partners

Some stupid customers are married to other stupid customers. Some just drag their not-so-stupid other halves along for the ride to suffer in silence. Sometimes they don’t suffer in silence. One thing is true for all three, they’re all hilarious.

Married To The Job

| Clifton, NJ, USA | Crazy Requests, Spouses & Partners

(It is about five minutes before the end of my shift and I have just escorted a customer to the product he wanted.)

Me: “Is there was anything else you need?”

Customer: “No, thanks; I have everything. Thank you for your help.”

(When I turn around, I see my husband standing a few feet away, waiting for me to finish my shift. I told him I had to clock out and gave him a quick kiss. From behind me I hear my previous customer ask with a chuckle and wink:)

Customer: “What do I have to do to get customer service like that?”

Me: “You’d have to marry me; this is my husband!”

Maybe You Should Sleep On It

| FL, USA | Home Improvement, Spouses & Partners

(An elderly couple comes in to buy a mattress. A coworker of mine is assisting them as they look at a new set.)

Husband: *examining mattress* “Is this mattress double-sided?”

Coworker: “Nope.”

Husband: “Oh… how do you know which side to sleep on?”

Coworker: “The side that has the quilt on it…”

Doesn’t Have A Good Frame On Pricing

| MD, USA | Money, Spouses & Partners

(I work in the framing department of a big name arts and crafts store. I’ve just finished an order for a female customer that comes out to about $170 total. (We have a good sale on; her original total was about $450). She realizes her husband has her wallet and groans a bit.)

Customer: “Shoot. My husband will never go for this. I knew I should have taken my wallet with me.”

(She calls her husband and he comes over.)

Customer’s Husband: “Wow, that looks good!” *he sees the total* “It’s going to be how much?! Are you kidding me?”

Customer: “Honey, it’s for [Son]’s college graduation. We were going to give him that much on a gift card anyway.”

(They argue for a while, while I stand there feeling horribly awkward.)

Customer’s Husband: “No, that’s ridiculous. I bet I could get this guy I know to do it for $50. I work on his boats; he’ll do it for me.”

(Note that $50 isn’t even enough to cover the discounted glass, let alone frame and assembly.)

Customer: “Fine. Talk to your guy.”

(As he stomps off the wife turns back to me.)

Customer: “I’ll be back tomorrow.”

(I worked the next night, and yes, she did come back.)