Category: Movies & TV

He Bought It In Springfield

| Great Falls, MT, USA | Extra Stupid, Language & Words, Movies & TV, Technology

(I work at a call center, registering service plans for customers.)

Customer: “Can you help me set my TV up?”

Me: “I’m not tech support but I can give you the manufacturer’s number so they can help you. What is the brand of your TV?”

Customer: “Simpsons.”

Me: “Simpsons?”

Customer: “Simpsons. Like the TV show. S-A-M-S-U-N-G.”

Me: “…”

Customer: “Simpsons.”

Me: “Samsung.”

Customer: “No! Simpsons! Can you not hear me correctly?”

Me: “Yeah, I did hear you. Let’s get you Simpsons’ number.”

Flurries Of Furries

| ME, USA | Bizarre, Movies & TV

(I am working by myself at the box office out in front of the theater when an individual walks in wearing a full wolf costume, head and all.)

Wolf-Man: “Yes, one adult to ‘Zootopia,’ please.”

(However, posted very clearly next to me is a sign saying that we cannot sell tickets to those wearing anything obstructing an individual’s face or any sort of prop weaponry.)

Me: “I’m very sorry, but unfortunately I cannot sell your ticket while you have that mask with you. It is a company policy for the safety of all of our guests.”

(The individual doesn’t take very kindly and, still wearing the wolf head, tells me very sternly:)

Wolf-Man: “This is my head. I am Greypaw the Wolf, and while I am in my fursona, that is who I am, so I would like to buy my ticket, please.”

Me: *gesturing to the sign next to me* “Unfortunately, I can’t let you purchase tickets until you remove the head. I have to ask you to return it to your car before we can complete the transaction.”

Wolf-Man: *still wearing the head and leaning over the counter* “I can smell that you are afraid of me. Just because I am an animal does not mean you need to be afraid. I’m just like you.”

Me: *pretty frustrated* “Sir, I don’t want to ask you to leave, but if you do not remove your mask, I will be forced to. It is a company policy and I have to uphold it.”

(This enrages him, causing him to lean over and growl at me, getting down on his hands and knees for some reason.)

Wolf-Man: “I am not a ‘sir’; I am a wolf and I expect to be addressed as such. I want to see this movie and all you are doing is preventing me because you obviously don’t like that I am not a human like you.”

Me: “Sir, I will gladly sell you the ticket. I’ll even store your mask in box office with me so you can be sure it’s safe. All I need you to do is take it off.”

Wolf-Man: *growled again, this time howling as well* “I am NOT a ‘sir.’ I am a WOLF!”

Me: “Well, I do have to apologize then, but not only do we have a no mask policy, but we do have a no pet policy, so I am going to have to ask you to leave.”

(He finally got the hint and stormed out, mumbling to himself the whole way to the door. Luckily there were no more customers in line as it was a slow day, but I never did see Greypaw again.)

Wasn’t Bargaining On It Being Frozen

| TX, USA | Movies & TV

(I am at a local small anime/cartoon convention. Though the con is mostly anime themed, some vendors sell sci-fi or fantasy merchandise. With me are my brother and sister. My brother loves quoting movies. We come to a vendor selling games and random figures. I’m checking out the figurines when my brother asks about a game.)

Brother: “How much for the game?”

Seller: “$40.”

Brother: *with an incredulous voice* “$40?! No, ten!”

(The poor seller looked so baffled by the sudden change of attitude and I put my face in my hands.)

Me: “Sorry, he’s quoting Frozen.”

(From the scene where Kristoff yells at the shopkeeper for pricing winter gear very expensive during summer, before getting thrown out. The seller laughed and said it was actually clever, so he offered my brother a $10 discount.)

Don’t Let Your Hair Go

| NH, USA | Family & Kids, Movies & TV

(When I arrive at work, I realize I have forgotten my purse. As I am wearing prescription sunglasses and my regular prescription glasses are in my purse, I must return to my car to retrieve it, making me late. My boss is very understanding, but I am still stressed out about it until the following happens on my way back. Note that I am wearing my extremely dark hair in a single braid over one shoulder, black jeans, sunglasses, and a dark turquoise knit tee.)

Little Girl: *waves at me* “Hi!”

Me: *waves back* “Hi!”

Little Girl: “Daddy! Daddy! She looks like Elsa!”

Dad: “She… does?”

Me: “Um, I think it’s the braid.”

Dad: “Oh!”

(It made my day!)

Doesn’t Understand The Word ‘No’

| Eden Prairie, MN, USA | Movies & TV

(I am in a video rental store in November 2013. I see an argument between the customer and a cashier.)

Cashier: “Hello! Can I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, I’m looking for ‘Doctor Who’. From 1962.”

Cashier: “Sure we have plenty of copies of those.”

(Cashier goes to the shelf and grabs a box for series one of the famous British TV series.)

Customer: “That’s not the one I want. I want the REAL one.”

Cashier: “What are you talking about when you mean, ‘REAL’?”

Customer: “The one from 1962.”

Cashier: “Still don’t know what you mean.”

Customer: “THE MOVIE! DON’T YOU KNOW THE MOVIE WHEN YOU HEAR THE TITLE?!”

Cashier: “What movie?”

Customer: “YOU KNOW, THE FIRST JAMES BOND MOVIE! HOW THE F*** DO YOU NOT KNOW THE TITLE OF THE FIRST JAMES BOND MOVIE?!”

Cashier: “I think the movie you’re referring to is called Dr. No. ”

Customer: “NO, I’M NOT TALKING ABOUT Dr. No! Doctor WHO FROM 1962!”

Cashier: “I think you should double check the James Bond filmography.”

Customer: “I DON’T NEED TO LOOK IT UP! I KNOW IT BY HEART!”

Cashier: “I don’t think you know the difference.”

Customer: “YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT THE F*** YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT! ALL OF THE PEOPLE IN THIS F****** STORE ARE A BUNCH OF IDIOTS!! NONE OF YOU KNOW WHAT THE JAMES BOND FRANCHISE IS! AND YOU SHOULD GET OUT OF HERE!”

Cashier: “I must ask you to leave.”

Customer: “WHY?!”

Cashier: “Because you are being intolerant right now.”

Customer: “FINE! I’M DONE WITH YOU IDIOTS ANYWAY BECAUSE YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT JAMES BOND IS!”

(A Doctor Who fan sees him walking out.)

Doctor Who Fan: *jokingly* “Who’s this BOND guy?”

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