Category: Money

Won’t Be Checking Out With This Cart

| San Diego, CA, USA | Bigotry, Crazy Requests, Money

(I have been operating a business for the past year where I buy merchandise from auctions, etc. and sell them on Craigslist. I’ve got seven years of customer service under my belt, so I know how to deal with people. The following conversation occurs through text messages. He contacts me about a janitorial cart I have listed for $75.)

Craigslister: “Do you still have your janitor cart still for sale to make an offer on?”

Me: “Hi there! Yes, it’s still available. I won’t be around tomorrow but my boyfriend will be here all day if you’d like to come check it out.”

Craigslister: “Will you ask him if he will take $30 for it?”

Me: “Definitely not. The lowest we can go is $60. They sell in store for over $100 and this one hasn’t been used. If you can do $60 we have a deal.”

Craigslister: “Highest I’ll do is $40. They’ve got almost new ones on Craigslist for $50.”

Me: “And my new one for $60, no almost about it. But there’s no use haggling. Your mind is made up. Best of luck to you.”

Craigslister: “I actually wanted one so I could make my grandpa a fishing cart for his birthday. So no use being a jerk. If it’s so new you should return it.”

Me: “I’m not being a jerk. If you won’t do my asking price, you don’t need to point out what others are selling it for. If you can find it for less, why even ask me? I think it’s a sweet idea what you’re doing but you’re not going to coerce me into selling it for next to nothing because others have it for $10 less than I’m willing to go. Get it from them then and be done.”

Craigslister: “You must be a woman.”

Me: “You must be an idiot.”

Craigslister: “Nah, the idiot is gonna be the guy that buys the cart. You’re probably an illegal if anything. Who buys janitorial supplies? Or you stole it.”

Me: “You’re funny. This is my business. I buy and sell things on Craigslist. I deal with people like you all the time. You think that by telling me someone has it for cheaper that I will lower my price. Just get it from them then! Don’t waste my time. I really don’t care what you’re going to do with it. If you don’t like my price, move on. Don’t attempt to insult me because I won’t take half price for it. That’s your problem, not mine.”

Craigslister: “Yup, I was totally right. You’re illegal. Go back to Mexico.”

(My blood was boiling at this point, so I decided to just walk away from it. After cooling down several hours later, I posted an ad on Craigslist in Spanish asking for yard work with his phone number as the contact. I giggled and have now moved on with my life.)

Coupon Complication

| Peterborough, ON, Canada | Food & Drink, Money

(We have several coupons out. One is for a “two can dine.” This means the customer gets two full combos for a set price, in our case $10 + tax.)

Customer: “Hi, I’d like to use this.”

(Presents coupon.)

Me: “No problem; we can do that for you.”

(The transaction goes well until it’s time for him to pay.)

Me: “That will be [total], please.”

(His total is $11 and change. He hands me $1.50 and the coupon.)

Me: “Sorry, I still need another $10 from you.”

Customer: “No, I gave you the coupon.”

Me: “You did, but you still owe me $10.”

Customer: “The coupon says $10 off. I gave you the coupon so I only owe you the difference.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but that isn’t how it works. This coupon lets you buy two combos and you only pay $10 instead of the regular $17 or so.”

Customer: “But it says right there: take $10 off.”

(This goes on for a few minutes, with the supervisor on shift explaining it to him as well. Eventually he leaves without buying anything.)

Customer: *on his way out* “Bunch of morons. Your other store wouldn’t do it right, either.”

Acting Super Fly In Superdry

| London, England, UK | Extra Stupid, Geography, Money

(I work in a brand-name British clothing store. The brand is British, but as an artistic choice most of the clothing has Japanese text and the word ‘Japan’ in the logo, so it is common for a lot of customers to think the brand is Japanese. I am Chinese but I was born and raised in the UK.)

Customer #1: *to [Customer #2]:*  “Why are we in this stupid store?”

Customer #2: “Because I like it! And I like supporting British companies.”

Customer #1: “You’re so stupid! This is a Japanese company! All you’re doing is supporting the Japanese!”

Me: “Sorry to interrupt, madam, but I couldn’t help overhearing. [Store] is actually a British company. The Japanese element is just an artistic choice. Not only that, but all our clothes are made in the UK as well.”

Customer #1: “You’re just saying that because you’re Japanese! You just want to send our money back to Japan!”

Me: “I was actually born here, madam, and not that it matters, but my ethnicity is Chinese, not Japanese.”

Customer #1: “Same thing!”

Customer #2: “Oh, my God! You can’t say that!”

Customer #1: “Sure I can.”

Me: “Madam, I couldn’t help but notice that you are carrying some [Other Brand Clothing Store] shopping bags.”

Customer #1: “So?”

Me: “That is an American brand. I am sure the USA appreciates your support.”

Customer #1: “Whatever!”

Customer #2: “Oh, shut up, [Customer #1]! And besides, you’re Polish!”

That’s How The Cookie Change Crumbles

| Lahore, Pakistan | At The Checkout, Money

(I’m at a really popular fast food restaurant that sells sandwiches as subs. I’m here to buy only a cookie as they sell really good cookies and the store is right next to my house. I have borrowed some money from my mother for the cookie and she has given me all the change she has because she didn’t want it!)

Me: “Hello!”

Cashier: “Good day, sir.”

Me: “I want a chocolate chip cookie.”

Cashier: “How many, sir?”

Me: “Just the one.”

Cashier: “That’ll be 80 rupees.” *approximately $0.80*

(I look around the shop to see if anyone’s looking, then proceed to drop 80 rupees worth of coins on to the counter. They make a little more noise than I thought and everyone stares at me.)

Cashier: *wide-eyed* “Seriously?”

Me: “Hey, if you feel bad, imagine what I’m going through. Everyone here is staring at me because my mom refused to give me proper money!”

Skating Around The Cheapness

| Australia | Money

(We have a big sale going on and I’m helping a customer choose some cufflinks for her fiancé. We have about 30 on show and about a third are half price.)

Customer: “Oh, those ones are nice but they’re not reduced. Can’t you do anything about the price?”

Me: “Unfortunately not. Since we have heaps of items on sale we can’t reduce anything not part of the sale.”

Customer: “Aw, really? Can’t you ask the manager?”

Me: “…I am the manager.”

Customer: “Oh, haha.”

(She ‘ums’ and ‘ahs’ for several minutes talking with her friend about which would look better but then finally settles on a set on sale for $12. We go to the till to ring her up.)

Customer: “Oh, don’t you have any chains that are 18ct?”

Me: “No, sorry. They’re all 9ct because no one wants to pay the price for 18ct chains.”

Customer: “Oh, haha. What a bunch of cheapskates.”

Me: *internally dying at the irony*