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Category: Money

700 Reasons To Get Grounded

| Fort Worth, TX, USA | Family & Kids, Money, Transportation

(I’m a manager at a fairly large automotive repair. I am in my office the day after Christmas, and I hear an angry customer yelling at one of my workers. I came out and take over.)

Me: “What seems to be the problem, sir?”

Customer: “I just had my car here to get a brake job done at this shop. When I got my car back nothing had been done.”

Me: “Okay, sir, let me pull up your information so I can see what all was done. I’m sorry for the inconvenience, and I’ll do my best to solve this for you.”

Customer: “She already tried to pull up my information. She said I’m not in the system, but I know I’m in there.”

(I get him to give me his information, have him look at the screen to make sure it was all correct. Sure enough he isn’t in the system.)

Customer: “No! I know my car is in your system. My son brought it in to get worked on.”

(I get the information for his son, and still no car in the system.)

Me: “Sorry, sir, but we have no record of any work being done on your vehicle.”

Customer: “That’s BS! My son brought in my car just yesterday to get the work done. It cost me $700!”

Me: “Sir, we were closed yesterday for Christmas. No one was here. There is no way we could have done the work on your car.”

Customer: “Then why did I have to give my son $700 for the wor…”

(All I could do was shrug as I watched him piece things together and realize that his son had probably spent $700 on something else.)

If You Put Your Mind To It

| Switzerland | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Money

(I work part time in a store that sells sweets and little toys. A man in his mid-twenties walks in.)

Customer: “I’d like to buy this. How much would that be?” *points at an item*

Me: “That would be [Price].”

Customer: “So. I’m thinking about [Price] right now. I take it out of my mental savings account and mentally transfer it to you. How about that?”

Me: *puzzled* “Uhm…”

Customer: “Did you get it?”

Me: “Uhm… No, I didn’t get it. I work with real money here.”

Customer: “But I want to buy it with my mental money! Can’t I buy it like this? I’m imagining it really, really hard right now! I WANT THIS!”

Me: “I’m sorry; I can’t help you with that.”

Customer: “Well, at least I tried.”

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 38

| Lexington, KY, USA | Extra Stupid, Money

(As I finish up opening an account with the minimum opening deposit for a brand new customer at my in-store bank, I explain about EVERYTHING that I give him: disclosures, business card, signature card, and starter checks.)

Me: “Here are your starter checks. A lot of places won’t take them, since they don’t have your name or address printed on them, but they will work to get direct deposit set up with your employer; just write your name and addresses across the top of the check and VOID across the check.”

Customer: “So, I can use these to pay for things, right?”

Me: “Once you’ve deposited some more money in your account, you can order regular checks that more places will accept. Right now, you would have to check with the retailer. Some places might take them for smaller amounts.”

Customer: “Okay, thanks.”

(Ten minutes later, a store employee calls me.)

Employee: “Can you verify a check for me? I know you aren’t supposed to, but the customer says you just told him he could write a check here.”

Me: “I can try. What’s the account and amount?”

Employee: “It’s [account I just opened] for $4,250.”

Me: “Yeah, not going to happen. Send him back up here and I’ll see if I can explain it better.”

(The customer returns.)

Customer: “Well, you gave me checks, so I figured I had better use them and get the stuff I needed. Our TV broke.”

Me: “As of right now, your account only has $25 in it, so you can’t write a check for more than that.”

Customer: “I have to put money in my account?!”

Related:
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 37
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 36
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 35

Not In Concert With Her Purchases

| MA, USA | Extra Stupid, Money, Musical Mayhem

Customer: “What is this $295 charge from [Ticket Broker]?! I did not make that!”

Me: “I can help you with that. It says they were for Beyonce tickets. Do you remember making this charge?”

Customer: “No, I did not do that!”

Me: “Did you lose your card?”

Customer: “Yes, duh!”

Me: “When was the last time you used the card?”

Customer: “I don’t know… What has that got to do with anything?”

Me: “If you lost the card, the last charge you made would be the best place to start. When did you find out the card was lost?”

Customer: “Today.”

Me: “Okay, is the $400 ATM withdrawal yesterday yours?”

Customer: “Yes! That’s mine; that was the last time I had my card. I must have lost it after that.”

Me: “Well… the [Ticket Broker] charge was done two days before that. So the charge was done before you lost the card. Are you sure you did not buy Beyonce tickets?”

Customer: “Uh… I could have. Maybe I just forgot… Bye!”

Me: *thinking, how can one forget buying concert tickets three days ago?*

Will Find It Or Dime Trying

| NH, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Money

(I work in a grocery store. There are little trash cans between the register and the little counter with the card payment system. I’m giving the customer her change when a coin falls into the trash bucket. Most customers brush it off and leave.)

Me: “Oh, I’m so sorry. Let me get that for you” *find the dime and give it to her* “Well, have a nice day!”

Customer: “There should be another dime. I need my dime.”

Me: “Well, okay, let me look again.” *I look in the trash and around the ground* “Are you sure it wasn’t one dime,  ma’am?”

Customer: “No! Let me look.” *she then proceeds to pull out all the trash, tossing it onto my belt, then pouring out all the garbage*

Bagger: “What’s wrong?”

Me: “She lost her dime.”

(My bagger then starts searching the surrounding area for the dime.)

Customer: *stops after about 10 minutes of searching and looks straight at me* “Oh, well, it’s just a dime.” *she leaves*

Me: *to the next customer* “Hi, how are you today?”

(I’m laughing pretty hard by now, as I could barely keep from cracking up while watching this lady. I’m not even mad.)

Customer #2: “If she took any longer, I would’ve just given her a dollar!”

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