Category: Money

Photo Perfect Representation Of A Cheapskate

| AL, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Money

(I am a manager. I am called up to the front to perform a return on a passport photo without a receipt.)

Me: “Hi, so you need to return this passport photo?”

Customer: “Yes, the visa office said it wouldn’t work.”

Me: “I’m so sorry about that. I’ll get this taken care of. Now, without a receipt, I can only offer you store credit unless you have the card you purchased it with.”

Customer: “Oh, no, I don’t want store credit. I’d like cash. I paid with cash.”

Me: “Yes, I understand, but without a receipt, the only options I can provide you with are an exchange or store credit.”

Customer: “Just a moment. I know I kept that receipt.”

(The customer begins digging through purse. My cashier shoots me a look that lets me know that she had previously done this and no receipt was found. Two minutes pass.)

Customer: “Oh, here it is!” *hands me a receipt from our competitor*

Me: “No, ma’am, this is from [Competitor] and for breath mints.”

Customer: “Oh. I guess I’ll take store credit.”

(I run the transaction through and the customer leaves. Per policy, I shred the returned photos and throw the pieces away I think I am done for the day. Twenty minutes later…)

Customer: “EXCUSE ME, MISS!” *interrupting me helping another customer*

Me: “Yes, ma’am. I’ll be with you in one moment.” *goes back to ringing up customer*

Customer: “Well, I’ll be real quick. I need my photos back.”

Me: “Just one moment, ma’am, and I’ll help you.” *finishes with customer* “Ma’am, what photos are you referring to?

Customer: “That passport photo I just returned. I want it back.”

Me: “Ma’am, after I returned them, I shredded them for your protection. I could reprint them or retake a passport photo and ring you up, though.”

Customer: “No, I don’t want to pay for it. Since the picture had my face, I wanted to keep it and get my refund. Why did you shred it?”

Me: *confused* “So you wanted your money back and to keep the picture?”

Customer: “Yes.”

Me: “Ma’am, if you brought back a defective blood pressure monitor and returned it, I would keep the blood pressure monitor. I would not let you have the monitor and your money back.”

Customer: “But I wanted everything for free. I saw it on TLC and thought for sure it would work. I heard young women managers are usually nice about this thing.”

(I can only assume she meant ‘Extreme Couponing’ or ‘Extreme Cheapskates.’ She left after trying to convince my cashier to dig through the garbage and tape all the pieces together. Some people make me wonder about humanity.)

You’re Not Getting Change Until You Change

| Philadelphia, PA, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Food & Drink, Money

(I am in line with my friend and have ordered myself a latte. The cashier turns to relay the order to the barista when a man arrives, tosses two dollars on the counter, grabs a small coffee cup, and heads over where the black coffee dispensers are without saying a word. The cashier turns back around and sees the money on the counter.)

Cashier: “Oh, honey, it’ll be more than $2.”

Me: “Actually, that’s not mine. That man over there just threw that down. I think he’s paying for a coffee?”

(We turn and watch as the man exits, still silent.)

Cashier: “…okayyy. Guess someone’s not getting their change today.”

Telling A Label Fable

| UK | At The Checkout, Money

(I am cashiering when a customer comes up to the colleague next to me. She has a barbecue set and is claiming that it is being sold for £19.99. It is actually priced at £89.99 according to the giant sticker, however the customer points to a small sticker on the side, which is reserved for clothing items only, and says so on the sticker itself. She doesn’t take no for an answer and asks for a manager. The manager weakly puts up a defense for not dropping the price, but I’m losing my patience with how dense the customer is being while carrying a smug grin. I kindly ask my customers to wait a moment.)

Customer: “BUT IT SAYS £19—”

Me: “Actually, that set is £89.99. I put that price on myself yesterday.”

Customer: “BUT THE STICKER—”

Me: “This one? It says ‘CLOTHING ONLY’ along the top. It has either has been incorrectly placed or someone else put it there to get a bargain.” *Customer blushes*

Customer: “But you have to honour it!”

Me: “No, we don’t. The sticker clearly does not belong on that item, and therefore we are not bound into sell it for that price. The whole reason for the labelled sticker is to protect against this happening. In fact, even if the sticker was the right one, but for the wrong price, we still reserve the right to refuse the sale if you don’t want to pay the actual price. So your choice is either pay £89.99, or get out.”

Customer: “YOU’RE LOSING A MASSIVE SALE!”

Me: “If we sold it to you at your price, we would lose £70 on a £90 sale. I can already see three customers in line with one, so I think they’re popular enough to be sold to people who are willing to pay what they’re worth.”

(The customer looks around, mouths “f*** you” and runs out of the store.)

Manager: “Well done! I was just going to lower the price.”

Next Customer: “And that’s why he’ll have your job someday. Loss prevention is a big deal when it comes to retail, and had it been me in charge you would have had to explain that loss. I might actually introduce a label system like that at my store. It’s genius!”

(I ended up getting written up for mouthing off to a customer and “losing the sale.” I didn’t really care as it was just a job until I went to university. I left shortly after a new general manager took over, and decided that the manager in the story wasn’t allowed to handle sales anymore, and she wasn’t allowed to be the only manager on duty because of it.)

Scoring Ten For Security

| MD, USA | At The Checkout, Money

(In our store, we are instructed to check any bill bigger than a $5 to see if it’s counterfeit. It takes about a second and people usually don’t care, but not everybody is so easygoing. This happens as I’m ringing out a customer who’s paying with a $10.)

Me: *checking the $10 bill*

Customer: *sneering, in the snottiest tone of voice I’ve ever heard* “Ugh. I can’t believe this. Who even checks tens?”

Me: *as I’m cashing her out* “People who have received counterfeit $10 bills in the past.”

Customer: *face falls; she then speaks with none of the snot in her previous statement* “Wait, really? You really get fake tens?”

Me: “Just last week, in fact.”

Customer: *sounding surprised, and somewhat pleasant* “Oh!”

(She gave me no more snot about checking for fake bills. I’m glad that went as well as it did. Some people take me checking bills as directly calling them a counterfeiter.)

Grilling You About The Cheese

| USA | Crazy Requests, Money

(I work as a cashier at a restaurant with good quality food for moderate prices. We have a meal deal where you pick two entree items in half portions, but you pay less than regular half or full-pricing for each item. Every price for every item is up on the huge menu board directly in front of the customer, so you can figure out exactly how much you’re going to be spending. It’s a little past the peak of lunchtime rush, and a woman with two kids comes in and places her order; getting two meal deals and one regular. I read her entire order back to her to make sure I got it correct. She confirms that it is.)

Me: “Okay, your total is $31.25.”

Customer: *sharply* “Excuse me?”

Me: *trying to keep a cheerful tone* “Your total for the order is $31.25.”

Customer: “That is absolutely ridiculous. I have to pay 31 dollars for this? That’s expensive!”

Me: “I know, ma’am, and I’m sorry. But, since you got two meal deals, it is cheaper than it would’ve been if you’d gotten the regular full portions. Would you like to change anything in your order before I ring it up, see if it makes it a little cheaper?”

Customer: *sighing heavily* “No, it’s… ugh, it’s fine. Just swipe my card. Ugh, this is ridiculous.”

(I swipe the customer’s card and give her a copy of her receipt to keep and another to sign off on. She blinks down at her receipt, up at the menu board, and then scowls at me.)

Customer: “Wait, those two grilled cheeses are $4.19 each.”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, those are the ones you confirmed for your order before you paid.”

Customer: *sighing* “Okay, well, I wanted the cheaper ones. The $3.59 ones. Change them.”

Me: “Okay, ma’am, I’m sorry about that. I’ll get a manager over and we can refund the $1.20 difference to your card.”

Customer: “Excuse me?! I only get a dollar and twenty cents back?”

Me: “Yes ma’am, there’s a 60 cent difference between [Grilled Cheese #1] and [Grilled Cheese #2]. You have two [Grilled Cheese #1]s on your order that you’d like to switch, so you’d be getting a dollar and twenty cents refunded to your credit card.”

Customer: “Are you kidding me? What’s the point of changing it if I only get a dollar and twenty cents back?! My order will still be 30 dollars! It’s almost not even worth getting the money back.”

Me: “I’m so sorry, ma’am, but the price difference is $1.20, so $1.20 is what you’ll be refunded.”

(Why this customer got so offended over a refund that anyone who can do basic math would be able to calculate is beyond me, but regardless, she got her $1.20 refunded, and complained about it the whole time.)

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