icon_money

Category: Money

icon_criminals

This Isn’t Going To Plan

| Ottawa, ON, Canada | Criminal & Illegal, Money

(I work in customer service for a web hosting company. I get a call from a customer complaining that she’s been billed way more than she should be for her monthly service charges.)

Customer: “I was charged over $1,000 last month. My service plan is supposed to only be $9.95!”

Me: “That seems awfully high. Let me see what’s going on.”

(I check her account usage.)

Me: “Ma’am, I’m very sorry but when I check your account, I see that you bought our basic plan that only allows up to 500 MB and uploaded a site that’s over 6000MB.”

Customer: “Yeah, so?”

Me: “Well, ma’am, with the plan you have, we set aside a small space on our server for your site. If you exceed that size, we charge over usage fees in the amount of (price per MB over limit).”

Customer: “Well, that’s insane! Why have you never notified me of this?”

Me: “Actually, ma’am, we sent a notification as soon as you went over limit and we’ve notified you on your monthly statements every month that you’ve been over.”

Customer: “How long has this been going on?!”

(I look back into her account history and notice she’s had this issue ongoing for three years. I immediately know this isn’t going to end well.)

Me: “I’m terribly sorry, ma’am. It appears you’ve been in an over state for over three years.”

Customer: “What the h***? This is fraud! I haven’t had a single notice in all this time!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. We clearly note on your monthly statements what you’re paying for. Did you never see the entry for ‘over usage’?”

Customer: “Well, yeah, I saw that… I mean, why didn’t you ever send me anything else?”

Me: “We did send you a notice three years ago, when you uploaded your site, that it was over the size limit for your package. I’d be happy to help you upgrade to a bigger package so you don’t face these charges again.”

Customer: “I’m sure you would… How much does the upgrade cost?”

Me: “It would come to $24.95 per month.”

Customer: “That’s highway robbery! I won’t pay that! I’ll stick to the plan I have, thank you!”

(After I got off the phone with her I had to shake my head a few times to process what just happened.)

icon_liarsscammers

Doesn’t Have Twenty-Twenty Cent Vision

| Bavaria, Germany | At The Checkout, Liars & Scammers, Money

(Here in Bavaria stores are mandated by law to close at 8 pm so it’s usually rather packed from 7:30 until 8 pm. A line of approximately 15 people are waiting at the register. First in line is a woman in her 40s.)

Woman: “I’m sorry. Why is my receipt saying this cucumber is 70 cents?! I’m pretty sure it’s 50 cents.”

Cashier: “Well, if it rings up for 70 cents it usually is. But I can take a look at my price sheet.” *she takes a look in her binder* “No, sorry, 70 cents.”

Woman: “Well, then you must have priced it wrong. The price tag said 50 cents!”

Cashier: “I’m sorry. Maybe you looked at the wrong price tag. Happens to the best of us.”

Woman: “NO! YOU ARE COMING WITH ME TO THE AISLE RIGHT NOW! I’m not letting you f*** me over! They cost 50 cents!”

Cashier: “Well, if you insist.”

(The cashier is standing up from her register and walks away with the angry woman. Meanwhile there are over 20 people waiting in line. It only takes 2-3 minutes until the cashier comes back with the woman who appears even more angry.)

Woman: “NO! YOU’RE F****** ME OVER! I’m sure someone heard me complaining and changed the tag! THEY WERE F****** 50 CENTS!” *while waving around with said cucumber, slamming it on the counter*

Cashier: “Well, again, I’m sorry but the tag, the register, and my price sheet are saying 70 cents. Now please pay so I can attend to those other customers.”

Woman: “NO! QUIT YOUR LYING. YOU’LL GET ME YOUR MANAGER NOW! I’M NOT GONNA—”

(Suddenly, a customer is walking up to the woman and throws 20 cents at the counter. By now the line reached until the back of the store.)

Man: “HERE! Now take your stuff and leave. Let’s hope the IRS will not find out I’m throwing around such huge sums!”

(The woman angrily stormed out, got in her – I wish I was kidding – BMW-SUV, and drove away. The kicker? She left the cucumber behind.)

icon_money

Panicking At The Tipping Point

| Canada | Food & Drink, Money, Non-Dialogue

I am the customer. I order a pizza online and get a “Pizza of the Day” deal for a $10 discount.

When the pizza is delivered, I notice I do not have my card with me. My mistake. I forgot how much the order was for, so I ask him to tell me the amount, and he just shows me the receipt.

I am in a hurry, so I notice the total amount ($41) before the deal discount, frantically try to search for some loonies since he does not have any spare change on him, and finally give him $46.

All this time he is smiling at me, and I am just thinking may be he is trying to be friendly.

Just now, the order email confirmation catches my eye, and I see that I paid an extra $15 for the pizza delivery and realize that probably that’s why the delivery guy was smiling, thinking he is getting a huge tip!

icon_extrastupid

Wish You Could Shoe Away This Customer

| USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Money

Me: “Hi, [Customer], I see here you want to place an order for this shoe?”

Customer: “Yes, can we also get the brown pair as well?”

Me: “Of course, give me one moment!”

(I find the other shoe pretty quickly.)

Me: “Okay, you’re new total is $32.93.”

Customer: “No, that other agent said I would get free shipping!”

(I look over the order total. The shipping for an order with more than one item is, as I thought, 8.95. But it looks like the last agent gave her a $10 store credit to cover the shipping.)

Me: “It looks like you are only paying for the cost of the shoes; I see a $10 credit that has been placed on the account to cover the shipping.”

Customer: “No! My total is supposed to be 13 dollars!”

Me: “Ma’am, that would be your total if you had only one pair of shoes.” *breaks down the total for her of the two shoes [16.99 each] and the shipping, and then points out the ten dollar credit*

Customer: “Well, if I place one order with one item, and then I can call you guys back and place the second order, then will it be 13 dollars like he said it would?”

Me: “Ma’am, you can place all the orders you want with me right here, and placing the items on different orders would make it cheaper, but we do ask that you pay for the cost of the shoes.”

Customer: “Okay, let’s do that!”

Me: “Okay.” *takes one pair of shoes out of the cart* “Your total is $13.94. Do I have your permission to charge your card?”

Customer: “Why am I paying for shipping still?!”

Me: *considering disconnecting the call* “Ma’am, you aren’t paying for the shipping. Since there is only one item in the cart, your shipping is only 6.95. We gave you a $10 discount, so the shipping is free and the shoe itself is almost four dollars cheaper.”

Customer: *defeated* “Well, I’m just confused. I wasn’t told anything about any credit!”

Me: *deep breath while customer is on mute* “When we waive the shipping fee for you, we actually put a credit on your account to cover the shipping.”

Customer: *even more confused* “I want to talk somebody else.”

Me: *in a more firm, but still very nice tone* “Ma’am, no matter who you talk to math still works like math. If you have a shoe that costs $16.99 and shipping that costs $6.95, your total WILL be $23.94 normally, but we gave you a $10 discount on your order so your total is $13.94.”

Customer: “Okay, I’m confused but go ahead and place the order.”

Me: “Do I have your permission to charge your card in the amount of $13.94?”

Customer: “Yes.”

Me: *places order then gets the other shoe in the basket* “All right, now you have free shipping. I have the other shoe in your basket; do I have your permission to charge your card in the amount of $16.99?”

Customer: “No! The shoes are supposed to be 13 dollars! What is going on?”

Me: *goes quiet for what feels like forever* “The cost of the shoe is $16.99. Do I have your permission to charge your card in the amount of $16.99.”

Customer: “Well, I guess!”

Me: *places order* “Any other questions I can help you out with?”

Customer: “When should I expect to see them? I have an event I want to wear them at next week.”

Me: *our shipping timeframes are long, but the customer would know the timeframe if she’d read the very obvious description* “They should ship to us in 3-4 weeks because they are imported. Then they will ship out to you in one week.”

Customer: “YOU MEAN I HAVE TO WAIT—”

Me: “Have a good day, ma’am.” *click*

icon_technology

The PIN-nacle Of Annoying Customers

| GA, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Money, Technology

(A little bit of background: I work in a small fuel center attached to a grocery store, the kind that’s open air, with the fuel clerk in a small box, using an intercom speaker. We accept debit and credit cards, but our number pad is timed, for whatever reason, so that a dawdling customer will occasionally have to run their debit card again if they take too long. An elderly woman comes up to the window.)

Customer: “Yes, I’d like to put $10 on pump eight.”

Me: “All righty.” *opening the drawer and seeing that she’s given me a card* “And will that be credit or debit?”

Customer: “Debit.”

Me: *I nod and run her card, putting it back into the drawer, with the number pad* “Okay, ma’am, if you could just enter your PIN for me please.”

Customer: “What?”

Me: “Y-your PIN, please?”

Customer: “What is that?”

Me: “You’re running this as a debit card, right?”

Customer: “Yes, this is a debit card. It says right here.”

Me: “Well, if you’re running debit, I need you to enter your PIN on that little number pad right there.”

Customer: “Oh, okay”

(She starts to enter it and as she does the number pad times out, requiring me to run the debit card again, normally either not a problem or at worst a minor annoyance.)

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry, ma’am. It looks like the number pad timed out. I just need to run your card again, please.”

Customer: “What? I just did it.”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, I just need to run your card so you can re-enter your PIN.”

Customer: “But I already put it in.”

Me: “I understand that, ma’am, but it didn’t go through correctly. I need to run the card again.”

Customer: *starting to get pissy* “Now, look, I already put my number in. Can I pump my gas yet or not?”

Me: *I’m starting to lose my patience at this point* “Not yet. I need to run your card again, ma’am. Please, I’m trying to help you.”

Customer: “I already put it in.”

Me: *I decide to leave the ‘box’ figuring she must be having trouble hearing me* “Ma’am, this–” *I open the drawer and point the number pad out* “–is set on a timer, if you don’t enter your number it times out.”

Customer: “So I need to put it in again?”

Me: “Yes, once I’ve run the debit card again.”

Customer: “You know, I would have left already if I wasn’t on empty.”

(She then proceeds to put in her PIN, ignoring that I need to scan the card first.)

Me: *sighing* “Ma’am, I need to run your card fir—”

Customer: “Again?” *types in her PIN, which, once again, does nothing*

Me: *giving up, holding out my hand* “Just… Just give me your card.”

Customer: *hands it over and I go run it, instructing her to enter her PIN, which she, of course, complains about* “I won’t be coming back here again.”

Me: *to myself* “Good riddance.”

Customer #2: “Don’t worry, I’m paying with cash.”

Page 6/204First...45678...Last