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Category: Money

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Toying With Charity

| ON, Canada | At The Checkout, Money

(I want to start off by saying that it doesn’t bother me whatsoever if people don’t donate to charities. We have to ask because it’s part of our job, but I’m not offended when people say no, and I of course don’t judge them. I just thought this particular transaction was pretty funny.)

Me: “And would you like to donate to [Local Charity] today?”

Customer: “No, thanks. I don’t have enough money.”

Me: “Okay. So that’ll be [price].”

Customer: *looking at a $7 item* “Oh, what are these?!”

Me: “Oh, they’re just little gimmicky toys. They just say the store’s slogan when you press them, but they don’t do anything else.”

Customer: “Ha! That’s hilarious. I’ll buy one of those, too.”

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Only Half Sober

| England, UK | Money

(I am working as a cashier at a famous fast food restaurant. We have a special breakfast menu which is served from 5 am to 10:30 am exclusively and the main menu is outside of those times. A VERY drunk woman staggers in at 7 am.)

Drunk Woman: *slurred mumbling* “A burger, please.”

Me: “Sorry, I’m afraid we don’t have any burgers at the moment. We’re only serving breakfast right now.”

Drunk Woman: “Oh. I’ll have some fries then.”

Me: “Sorry, we do not serve fries at breakfast.”

Drunk Woman: “Oh… what can I have that’s like a burger?”

Me: “The closest I can suggest is a sausage muffin without the egg.”

Drunk Woman: “Fine, then, I’ll have two of them. And a bottle of water.”

Me: *thinking: yes, you need that water to sober up!* “Okay, that’s [total], please!”

Drunk Woman: *hands me HALF of a ten-pound note; it looks like it’s been literally ripped in half*

Me: “Um, this is half of a note.”

Drunk Woman: “Does it matter?”

Me: “Um, yes. Yes, it does.”

Drunk Woman: “Oh, okay, then.”

(She took her half of the ten pound note and staggered out, whilst we all watched, confused. Finally my colleague turned to me.

Colleague: “What’s betting that she thought half a tenner is worth a fiver?”

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Loonie Over A Toonie, Part 4

| UT, USA | Canada, Money

(I am in line at a check-out watching this. Please note that this is in Utah, which is several states and 1000s of miles from the Canadian border. Though some places in the US close to the Canadian border take Canadian money, I have never seen a store in Utah do it.)

Cashier: “That will be…”

(The customer hands over Canadian currency.)

Cashier: “I’m sorry, we don’t accept Canadian currency. Do you possibly have a card or anything?”

Customer: “It’s good money, and it’s illegal not to accept it.”

Cashier: “It is illegal for us to not accept American money, and it may be true that in Canada it’s illegal to not accept Canadian money, but we’re not under any obligation to accept Canadian money.”

Customer: “Well, the prime minister said this is good enough money.”

Cashier: “Your prime minister. I don’t have a prime minister. I have a president.”

Customer: “I demand you take my money.”

Cashier: “And I’m telling you that I can’t.”

Me: “How much is it?”

(The cashier tells me the small amount.)

Me: “I’ll just pay it.”

Customer: “No. I demand you accept my money.”

Cashier: “Fine.”

(She takes the money. After the customer leaves, she takes me up on my offer to pay and gives me the Canadian currency. Jokes on the other customer, because my parents live in Rochester, NY which is across a Great Lake from Canada, and a lot of places take Canadian money when I go home to visit.)

Related:
Loonie Over A Toonie, Part 3
Loonie Over A Toonie, Part 2
Loonie Over A Toonie

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This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 58

| Iowa City, IA, USA | Extra Stupid, Money

(I am working at a popular book store chain which has a membership card. This particular customer, hands me her card, but I see that it is expired.)

Me: “I’m sorry, it looks like your card is expired. Would you like to renew it?”

Customer: “It can’t be expired. I signed up for automatic renewal.”

Me: “That’s odd. Let me call member services and see what’s going on.”

(I call member services and they confirm that the customer was signed up for automatic renewal, but that her credit card was expired, so the renewal didn’t go through. I explain this to the customer.)

Customer: “That’s impossible. Credit cards don’t expire.”

Me: “Well, I can show you the expiration date on your card. It’s right here.”

Customer: “Right, but the bank sent me a new card. It has the same number and everything.”

Me: “But member services didn’t have your new card’s expiration date, so they weren’t able to charge you.”

Customer: “CREDIT CARDS DON’T EXPIRE!”

(We go back and forth like this, with the customer shouting at both me and a manager, until another customer offers to let the first customer borrow her membership card.)

Me: *to the manager, after both customers leave* “That was nice, but now the same thing is going to happen the next time she comes in.”

Related:
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 57
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 56
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 55

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Taxing Can Be Taxing

| WA, USA | Money

(A customer wants to send a money transfer to a friend in another state. Rates are pretty high for sending within the USA and people generally gripe.)

Me: “Would you like to send ‘Money in Minutes’ for [high price] or would you like to do ‘Next Day’ for [slightly lower price]?”

Customer: “Oh, I’ll do ‘Money in Minutes.’ I don’t mind paying the higher price.”

Me: *surprised at the lack of complaining* “Okay, no problem.”

Customer: “Yeah, I used to avoid paying any kind of taxes. I thought they were so stupid.”

Me: *confused as to why he’s suddenly talking about taxes, then realizing he thinks the transfer fee is a government tax* “Well, actually…”

Customer: “Then I realized that if we all actually, like, pay our taxes… then the government has more to, like, give out to us, you know?”

Me: “That is how that works, yes.”

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