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Category: Money

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 43

| Vancouver, BC, Canada | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Money

(Working for a large retail chain, our manager had decided that we would no longer accept checks, since they usually ended up bouncing. A customer walks up to the counter with an armful of stuff and pulls out his checkbook.)

Me: “Sorry, sir, but we don’t accept checks here.”

Customer: “But I prefer using checks.”

Me: “Sorry, we don’t accept them… How about your debit card?”

Customer: “I can’t use that. There’s no money in the account.”

Me: “Um… is this the same account for the check you were going to write?”

Customer: “Of course!”

Related:
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 42
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 41
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 40

Fourth Time Lucky

| BC, Canada | Extra Stupid, Money

(I work in a call centre for a movie rental company; this is not one specific interaction with a customer, but an exchange that happens at least once a day:)

Me: “In order to pull up your transaction, I need the last four digits of the card used.”

Customer: “My credit card?”

Me: “Yes, whatever card you use with us.”

Customer: “You need the last four digits?”

Me: “Yes.”

Customer: “Of my credit card?”

Me: “Yes.”

Customer: “The last four?”

Still Got Meat Between Their Ears

, | Adelaide, SA, Australia | At The Checkout, Food & Drink, Money

(I’m taking drive-thru orders over the speaker box. This particular fast-food chain is known for making burgers “your way” – adding or removing condiments, no matter what the request. Condiments such as lettuce and tomato are free within reason, but some customers try to get away with ordering a plain burger, and then requesting all of the condiments be added, assuming they will get a burger with everything for the price of a plain one.)

Me: “Hi, welcome to [Fast Food Restaurant]. Place your order when you’re ready, please.”

Customer: “I’ll have a hamburger, please.”

Me: “Sure thing; one hamburger is $1.10. Is there anything e-”

Customer: *”On the hamburger, I’d like cheese, lettuce, tomato, onion, and mayonnaise.”

Me: “No worries. That’s one Junior [Brand-name] burger with cheese. That’s $2.85; is there anything else?”

Customer: “… Oh, uh, I’ve changed my mind. How much is a five inch bun on its own?”

Me: “60c.”

Customer: “I’ll get a five inch bun, with sauce, mayo, lettuce, tomato, onion, and cheese.”

Me: “Sure thing. So, that’s a [full-priced burger] minus the meat. That’ll be $3.85… Drive through, please.”

Customer: “D*** IT! You guys are meant to be stupid high-school drop-outs that are easy to fool. Just give me the burger with the meat on it then, thanks.”

Has No Fortitude For Longitude, Part 8

| AZ, USA | Extra Stupid, Geography, Money

Me: “Thank you for calling [Credit Card Services]. I’m [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “I want to make a payment.”

(I take payment.)

Customer: “Am I late?”

Me: “Unfortunately, yes. The cut off time is midnight Eastern Time. But I can look into the late fee for you.”

Customer: “YOU GUYS ARE ALWAYS MAKING UP RULES TO SCREW THE CUSTOMER!”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “I’m in Texas! It’s not midnight where I am!”

Me: “I understand that, but we go by eastern time—”

Customer: “That’s just a made up rule!”

Me: “Sir, time is not a made up rule…”

Related
No Fortitude For Longitude, Part 7
No Fortitude For Longitude, Part 6
No Fortitude For Longitude, Part 5

Service With Room To Improve

| USA | Hotels & Lodging, Money

(I work at a hotel in an affluent city. Property around here goes for millions of dollars.)

Me: “Can I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, I want a room.”

Me: “Okay, the rate is [rate].”

Customer: *eyes bug out* “What?! How do you justify that?!”

Me: “Um… I don’t know. The sales department sets the prices, not me.”

Customer: “They must be on crack! It’s four walls! And a bed!”

Me: “Right… So, do you want to rent the room?”

Customer: *starts cursing and swearing* “No, I don’t want the room! I just want to know how you can charge that price!”

Me: “Well, the room comes with free internet, and free breakfast… and free gym.”

Customer: *sneeringly* “F*** the breakfast! Take that room and shove it up your a**! And tell that to the ‘sales’ department, too!” *struts off*

Coworker: “Man, what an idiot. He needs some anger management classes.”

Me: *to Coworker* “He’s going to check the hotel next door and across from us, and be back in fifteen minutes.”

Coworker: “No way!”

(I was right!)

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