Category: Money


That Scam Back-Tired

| USA | Liars & Scammers, Money, Popular, Transportation

(The phone rings.)

Me: “[Tire Shop].”

Customer: “I’m looking for a price on 10 ply [Brand] mud tires for my truck.”

Me: “Certainly, let me look at the computer and see what the price is on those… Looks like the price is [price] each.”

Customer: “No, that’s too high. I can get them somewhere else for [impossibly low price below wholesale].”

Me: “Well, in that case I’d get them for that price, because I can’t even get them for that price.”

Customer: *stammers, then is suddenly angry* “Uh… ah… are you calling me a liar?”

Me: “Huh, what?”

Customer: “Are you calling me a liar?”

Me: “Not at all, I’m just saying that wherever you found them for [low price] sounds like a good deal because that’s below what I could possibly get them for. Where did you even find them for that price? I might want to get some at that price, provided they’re not used or stolen.”

Customer: *click*


A Catalog Of Errors

| Christchurch, New Zealand | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Money

(A customer comes in with an old catalogue and discovers the item he wants is no longer that price.)

Me: “Sorry, sir, that catalogue ended three-days ago. See the start and end dates on the front?

Customer: “I don’t give a f*** about where you’ve got dates. The price is in writing so you have to honour it! I know my rights!”


Don’t Discount The Customer’s Ability To Discount, Part 5

| Belleville, WI, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Money

(I work for a company that sells sturdy, high-quality clothing for outdoor and physically-intensive activities. The prices tend to be higher than your average big-box clothing, but the quality and durability is such that most people are glad to pay a little extra for something they know is dependable. We are having one of our biggest sales. I’m taking catalog orders over the phone.)

Caller: “I want the [Popular Jacket, which is currently 50% off]. That should be $35.50 today, is that right?”

Me: “It’s coming up as $39.95. Let me double-check that.”

Caller: *already irate* “It’s half off, that makes it $35.95! I got the email about it this morning!”

Me: “I just checked. Normal price is $79.90, so 50% off is $39.95.”

Caller: “50% off is $35.50! What the hell kind of con game are you playing?!”

Me: “Umm, no. Half of $79.90 is $39.95. I just ran it through my calculator.”

Caller: “Hrmph. Fine, I’ll take that price. What’s my total?”

Me: *punching up the total* “After shipping, that comes to $49.90. How would you like to pay for that today?”

Caller: “WHAT?! There’s supposed to be free shipping! It’s right on your website; it says ‘free shipping for orders of $75 or more.’ I ain’t paying no $10 for shipping!”

Me: “Are there other items you’d like to order? Maybe we can bring this order up to where it quail—”

Caller: “No. This is all I’m getting. And you are waiving the shipping for me. I’m a first-time customer, and you’re gonna lose me if you don’t get rid of that shipping charge right now.”

Me: “I don’t have the authority to make that decision. Would it be all right if I put you on hold for just one minute while I ask my supervisor for permission to do that?”

Caller: “You ask whomever you need to, but I am not paying that shipping!

(I put the customer on hold and call the Assist line, which is essentially a group of supervisors there to answer questions when any call center agents need help.)

Assist: “Assist, this is [Supervisor].”

Me: “Hi, I have a customer on the line who wants me to waive shipping on a $39.95 order.”

Assist: “What all is on the order?”

Me: “Just [Popular Jacket]?”

Assist: “That’s already on a pretty steep discount. How’s their order history? Are they a regular customer?”

Me: “First time. And frankly, he’s being kind of combative about it.”

Assist: “No. He’s saving $40. We’re not waiving shipping.”

Me: “I thought so, but he was arguing enough that I kind of wanted backup.”

Assist: “Understandable. And I’m definitely backing you up. Tell him you don’t have permission. We’re already giving him 50% off; we’re not going lower than that.”

(I can almost hear the unspoken “we don’t need customers that petty” in her tone. I go back to my caller and tactfully explain that I did not get permission to waive the shipping fee.)

Caller: “Fine. You’re company is a bunch of greedy scam artists. I’ll just wait for it to go lower. Cancel the order. Goodbye!”

Me: *thinking to myself* “This is the lowest I’ve ever seen it go, and we’re selling out of things left and right. You’re going to be waiting a long time, buster! And you just gave up a $40 discount over $9.95.”

Don’t Discount The Customer’s Ability To Discount, Part 4
Don’t Discount The Customer’s Ability ToDiscount, Part 3
Don’t Discount The Customer’s Ability To Discount, Part 2


They Have You At Check-Mate

| AR, USA | At The Checkout, Money, Popular

(This particular customer has come to our store multiple times and this always happens.)

Cashier: “May I please see an ID?”

Customer: “Sure, sure, but my name isn’t on the check. My husband’s name is on it and we have the same address though.”

(She pulls out her ID and hands it to the cashier.)

Cashier: “I’m sorry but unless your name is on the check, I can’t take this form of payment.”

Customer: “That’s ridiculous. I do this all the time. She let me do it before!”

(The customer points at me.)

Me: “No, ma’am, I did not. Our policy is that we cannot accept personal checks unless they have your name, which matches your ID, printed on it.”

Customer: “Come on, just take my check. I swear you’ve taken it before.”

(At this point she looks behind herself at the next customer.)

Customer: “Can you believe this! How ridiculous is this?”

Customer #2: “Don’t look at me. I’m not going to help you try to get these girls fired.”

(After that the customer was just done. She left her cart full of things on the counter and stormed out all angrily.)


A Grape Way To Deal With Customers

| Calgary, AB, Canada | Food & Drink, Money

Me: *answering phone* “Good evening, this is [Grocery Store]. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Hi, my husband was in earlier and I find it hard to believe that the grapes he bought were so expensive! I think they were weighed incorrectly.”

Me: “Oh, well, if you would be able to come into the store, I can re-weigh them for you and correct for any price discrepancy.”

Customer: “Uh… I have to come in? Ugh.” *hangs up*

Me: *staring confusedly at the phone* “How else does she expect a price change to work?”

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