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Category: Money

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Getting Loony Over A Loonie, Part 2

| Winnipeg, MB, Canada | At The Checkout, Math & Science, Money

(I ring a customer’s transaction and everything is going well…)

Me: “Your total comes to $11.02.”

(She hands me $20.02.)

Me: “Oh, it’ll round down.”

(I give her back the two pennies and her $9.00 in change.)

Customer: “Oh, I want a straight $10 bill.”

Me: “You have to give me a dollar for that.”

(She tries to give me a loonie from the change I gave her.)

Me: “I gave you your change, so for you to get the $10 bill you have to give me $10 in change.”

Customer: “I want the $10 bill.”

(She tries to give me the $5 in addition to the loonie.)

Me: “No, I gave you your change.” *points to receipt* “You gave me a $20 for an $11 purchase. The change would be $9.”

(She motions to the loonie.)

Customer: “That is why I give you this. I want $10 bill.”

(This exchange went on for about five minutes before she got fed up and called me stupid.)

Related:
Getting Loony Over A Loonie

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Using Old Jokes Are No Joke

| Burlington, ON, Canada | At The Checkout, Money, Popular

(I am so sick and tired of fake laughing at this same joke. This time I play stupid. I am using a machine to check some bills for authenticity.)

Customer: “Are they good? I just made them this morning!”

Me: *stern, serious look on my face* “You printed these bills yourself?”

Customer: “Uh, no, I… Hehe, it was a joke.”

Me: “You realize printing counterfeit bills is a very serious felony? You could go to jail for 14 years.”

Customer: “Yes, I, uh… but they’re good, right? I was kidding.”

Me: “You’re lucky my machine isn’t showing any signs that they are counterfeit. But you should be more careful next time; it’s not something to joke about.”

(The customer nodded gravely, and left with his purchase and change. I don’t think I’ll be hearing that joke from him again!)

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Trying To Make Cents Of His Math

| TX, USA | Food & Drink, Money

(I work as a pizza delivery man and have just knocked on the customer’s door.)

Customer: “Hello.”

Me: “Good evening! Your total will be $25.90.”

(I exchange the pizzas for two $20s.)

Customer: “Just give me $15 back.”

(Thinking he was going to use the ones or a five as a tip I hand him the $15 he requested back only to have the door closing on my face.)

Me: “Excuse me, you still owe $0.90!”

Customer: “Really?”

Me: “Yes, sir, you gave me $40 on a $25.90 order and asked for $15 back. I assumed you had change to give me since you would still owe the $0.90.”

Customer: “Oh! Sorry, here take a dollar and keep the change.”

Me: *completely fake smile on my face* “Thanks. Have a great evening.”

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This Conversation Doesn’t Fit The Bill

| AB, Canada | Family & Kids, Food & Drink, Money, Popular

(My family is eating at a large restaurant. My dad is talking to my mom about an unrelated school activity that he didn’t know has fees involved. As this happens, the waitress comes with the bill.)

Dad: “I didn’t know we had to pay for it!”

Waitress: “Umm…”

Dad: “Oh, sorry, not that. I was talking about [school related activity].”

Waitress: “Thanks! You’d be surprised how many people don’t think they have to pay.”

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Trained To Avoid Their Baggage

| UK | At The Checkout, Money, Spouses & Partners

(I’m working on the till and a customer approaches with a birthday card. As in all large stores in England, we have to charge 5p for carrier bags. We’ve been receiving plenty of grief from customers who seem think the charge is up to the cashier, but this one was especially irate.)

Me: “That’ll be £3, please.”

Customer: *gives me a shocked/disgusted look, despite the price being clearly on the back of the card* “Why should I have to pay £3 for this card? Why, just because it’s got [Company] on the back? Why should I have to pay that?”

Me: *deciding to assume it’s a rhetorical question* “Do you need a 5p bag?”

Customer: “A 5p bag? A 5P BAG? I’m paying £3 for a card and now you want to charge me 5p for a bag?”

Me: “Okay, just the card, then. That’ll be £3.”

Customer: *calls her husband over* “Look at this. I have to pay £3 for this card and now she wants me to pay 5p for a bag. RIDICULOUS.”

Husband: “RIDICULOUS.”

(I think they might have actually both malfunctioned at this point.)

Customer: “I can’t believe you want us to pay 5p for bags when you charged me this much for a card.”

Me: “Here’s your change. Thank you. Goodbye!”

Customer: *storms off* “RIDICULOUS.”

Husband: *follows obediently behind his wife* “RIDICULOUS.”

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