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Category: Money

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Layaway Stayaway

| Franklin, TN, USA | Bizarre, Money, Popular

(I work for a women’s clothing store that has filed for bankruptcy and is going out of business. We have a customer that will put things on layaway and then forget about them until we call her to come pick up her stuff. About a month before we are going to close for good, she comes into the store.)

Customer: “I just heard you’re going to close! That’s awful. I love this store!”

Me: “I’m sorry, too. You’ve been a good customer of ours.”

Customer: “Well, I’m going to get some things while I can!”

(She shops for about half an hour before coming to the register.)

Customer: “I’d like to put these things on layaway, please.”

Me: “Of course, ma’am, but I have to tell you that all merchandise must be picked up before [date], because we will be closing our doors shortly after.”

Customer: “Of course. Of course. I understand. I’ll be back in to pick everything up next week.”

(I process the layaway and take her deposit payment of about thirty dollars.)

Me: “All right, ma’am, your layaway has been processed, and, just to remind you, it has to be paid for and picked up by [date]. We’re closing our doors a couple of weeks after that and we can’t have any merchandise left in the store. Any layaways left here will be returned and refunded.”

Customer: “Of course, I’ll be in next week! I promise!”

(Sure enough, the final day comes, and we’ve called her numerous times to tell her she has to pick up her things or have us return them for her, but she hasn’t come in or returned our calls.)

Boss: “Well, we have to do a return and process a refund.”

(We did the return, but she had paid in cash, so she would have to come into the store to pick up her refund. Two weeks later, after many voicemails, she has not come in to pick up her cash.)

Boss: “Lunch is on [Customer] today. She’ll have to go through the bankruptcy court now to get her money back.”

(To this day, I have no idea if she ever remembered she had left cash at the store.)

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So Cheap It’s A Steal

| PA, USA | Crazy Requests, Money, Popular

(The store is featuring a huge sale on clearance. For example, items marked down to $19 from an original price of $50+ are ringing up for $8.99. A customer comes up with two items that ring up $4.99 each, at least an 80% markdown from the original price.)

Customer: “Can I use this $10 off coupon I got on my phone?”

Me: “I’m so sorry. That coupon can only be used on regularly priced items. And it specifies that it’s $10 off $50 in purchases.”

Customer: “Well, how can I get another discount, then? Do you have any coupons I can use to bring down the price?”

Me: *after blinking out of sheer shock* “I… I guess you could steal it?”

(Thankfully, my manager heard my reply and started cracking up.)

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Has Been PINked

| NC, USA | Extra Stupid, Money, Popular

(I am ringing up some souvenirs for a visitor.)

Me: “All right, your total is [amount].”

(Customer hands me a card. I swipe it.)

Me: “Is this credit or debit?”

Customer: “Debit.”

Me: “If you could just enter your PIN on the pad here…”

(The customer looks at a tattoo of four numbers on his arm, and then enters his PIN.)

Me: “Umm… excuse me, sir, do you have your PIN tattooed on your arm?”

Customer: “Well, how else am I supposed to remember it?”

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Past Due For Another Bad Customer

| Indianapolis, IN, USA | Money, Technology

(I work in a corporate cell phone store. In comes a lady and her daughter, and I find out that they are wanting to upgrade the daughter’s account.)

Me: “Okay, well, let me pull up your account to verify that you are eligible for an upgrade. It does appear that you’re due for an upgrade on her line; however, it appears you have a past due balance on your account that would need to be paid.”

Customer: “Past due? I know that bill is not past due! That bill was due the 24th and it’s the 28th.”

(I take a deep breath.)

Me: “Ma’am, if you look at your past billing history your bill is due the 24th every single month.”

Customer: “But for you to say it’s past due is ridiculous.”

Me: “Ma’am, with all due respect, it is past due.”

Customer: “You consider four days being past due?”

Me: “It could be an hour past midnight and the system would consider it past due, ma’am.”

Customer: “Well, that’s f***ing ridiculous.”

Me: “Well, to proceed with the upgrade the system requires it to be paid.”

(She paid the bill and we upgraded her daughter. After, she stormed out still disgruntled. I looked in the system and she never paid it on time and was charged a monthly late fee.)

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Can’t Ever Get The Delivery Right

| FL, USA | Crazy Requests, Money, Popular

(A customer calls in about a change in her order delivery date. The call comes in on a Tuesday.)

Customer: “When I placed my order it told me my order would be delivered on Friday but I just got an email saying it would now be delivered on Wednesday.”

Me: *confused at the problem* “Ma’am, I’m sorry about the confusion but sometimes our shipping carriers are able to deliver packages sooner than expected and we notify you to let you know.”

Customer: “Well, that’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. You guys lied to me and this is very unethical.”

Me: “Ma’am, again I apologize about the change in delivery on this order. Is there a reason that you wanted the delivery on Friday versus receiving it earlier?”

Customer: “You’re missing the f****** point here, you idiot. You told me Friday and now you’re telling me Wednesday. What the hell kind of company are you running here?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, I am missing the point here and I apologize. Your original email stated the Friday was an estimated delivery date. That was not a guaranteed delivery day and we were actually able to get the order to you two days earlier than previously thought.”

Customer: “That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. Clearly you are an uneducated high school dropout who doesn’t know your ass from a hole in the ground.”

Me: “Well, I can certainly call the carrier and place a temp hold on this delivery but you would then have to pick it up from their FC on Friday since you don’t want it early.”

Customer: “You idiot, I do want it early. You are missing my point. You guys lied to me and are an unethical company.”

(I am waiting on the whole “give me” part of her speech to come in at any point and BAM there it is.)

Customer: “I demand a full refund for my order for this.”

Me: “Well, you are certainly entitled to a refund within 30 days of delivery. You can refuse the delivery on Wednesday and once we receive the order back you will be automatically refunded, or once you receive your order you can create a return online or by calling us back. But you would have to pay a return shipping fee.”

Customer: “Why would I refuse it or send it back? I want my order but you’re going to refund me for all my troubles.”

Me: “Ma’am, we aren’t able to refund you for an order that you don’t return.”

Customer: “Well, then, I guess I’m just going to call and dispute the charge with my bank.”

Me: “Ma’am, you certainly have that right but at this point I have already forwarded this call information to our internal investigations team and we will provide your bank with the full recording of this call once we receive the charge back inquiry from them.”

(She then hung up. She then called back in 29 more times that day to try and get me fired. We then redirected the order back to us, issued a refund, and blocked her account, address, CC #, phone #, and IP address from being able to order from our system in the future and she is now banned from our site.)

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