Category: Military

How To Disarm Volatile Customers

| USA | At The Checkout, Military, Money, Top

(I work at a clothing department store. We don’t offer a discount to our military, but we do have deals going on all the time. I overhear a customer speaking as if he has a military background. He eventually comes up to the counter.)

Me: “Hi, I couldn’t help but overhear, but what branch are you?”

Military Customer: “Oh, I am in [legitimate military branch]. I did a tour of Iraq for a while.”

Me: “In that case, I can see that you forgot your coupon! That’s not a problem; we’ll take 30% off for you!”

(The next customer behind him starts yelling.)

Next Customer: “I don’t have my 50% coupon!”

(I ignore her, and finished the soldier’s purchases.)

Next Customer: “I deserve my 50% off!”

Me: “Ma’am, our store has never had a coupon that goes over 30%.”

(The next customer begins to yell.)

Next Customer: “You gave that discount to him! Why can’t I get the discount?”

(The military customer calmly walks over, and takes off his left arm. The next customer’s eyes get really large.)

Military Customer: “Don’t worry, the 50% discount only costs an arm and a leg; give or take a bit.”

(The next customer flees without buying anything. Thank you to all of our military, and especially the ones with great humor!)

They Are Rotten To The Corps

| MI, USA | Bad Behavior, Military, Top, Wild & Unruly

(I am working late at my video store. Two customers enter, bad mouthing the military. As I prepare to suggest they keep it to themselves, one of the customers in the store beats me to it; a little 4′ 9″ woman I know to be a regular. She plants herself in front of the louder of the two guys, sticks out her hands and challenges them both.)

Woman: “Do you actually know anyone in the military, or have you ever been in the military?”

Large Guy: *mumbles something* “…not that desperate for money…” *mumbles*

Woman: “Well my husband is a Marine, so you shut up!”

(She kicks him in the knee. He screams and leaves, taking his buddy with him. As I make my way to speak with her, the only other customer in the store, a big bear of a guy, introduces himself to her.)

Other Customer: “Hi, I’m a former Navy Seal. I was on my way to take him apart, but I liked your way better!”

Full Metal Jacket Potatoes

, | Norway | Awesome Customers, Bad Behavior, Military

(On my way home from work, a buddy and I are stopping at a fast food joint just outside the military camp/training facility in my town. There is a long line of soldiers, privates, I assume, but also a young civilian lady almost at the front. As we have finally gotten to the front and are waiting for our food, a sergeant comes through the camp gates and walks directly to the front of the line.)

My Friend: “Excuse me, but I think this young man was first.”

(He points to the private who was about to place his order when the sergeant, rather rudely, walked in front of him.)

Sergeant: “No, I think that will be fine. Don’t you think so, [private’s name]?”

Private: “Yes, of course, sir.”

My Friend: “I don’t. Why do you think you can just go ahead of everyone else?”

Sergeant: “Because I am their superior officer! Now quit wasting my time.”

Me: “Ahem. Are you her superior officer too?”

(I point at the young girl standing a couple places behind him in line.)

Sergeant: “Well, no…”

My Friend: “Then get to the back of the line then! Have some common courtesy!”

(The sergeant walked sheepishly to the back of the line. We went over to our car and made sure to stay and watch until everyone had gotten their food, so he wouldn’t just barge ahead again.)