Category: Math & Science

Everyone needs basic math and science skills to survive. However, these customers were definitely sleeping their way through class!

Doesn’t Have The Math Jeans

| USA | Extra Stupid, Math & Science, Money

(A customer is trying to exchange a pair of jeans. My coworker notices he will be getting some money back.)

Coworker: “Sir, this pair of jeans is less than the pair you bought earlier, so I will give you the cash back.”

Customer: “That’s it! Give me my d*** pants back! I don’t want to deal with this s*** anymore!”

(My coworker looks stunned at the guy’s outburst.)

Coworker: “But sir, you’ll be getting money back!”

Customer: “I don’t care! Just give me my d*** pants back! Or explain it to me; I don’t understand this!”

Coworker: “Well sir, this pair—”

Customer: “Just give me the d*** pants! You guys always do s*** like this; you just lost a good customer!”

(The customer grabs the pants and storms towards the doors. As he leaves, a second customer stars applauding, and yells after him.)

Customer #2: “Sure doesn’t sound like it!”

New Degrees Of Stupidity

| WA, USA | Canada, Math & Science

(I work in a clothing store at an outlet mall where we get a lot of Canadian customers. It was particularly cold on the day this occurred. Two teenage girls walk into my store.)

Me: “Hey, how are you girls doing this morning? Are you staying warm?”

Girl #1: “We’re trying!”

Me: “When I came into the store from my car this morning, it was 18 degrees! That’s FREEZING!”

Girl #1: “Yeah it is… Wait, how did you know we were from Canada?”

Me: “…I didn’t…”

Girl #1: “But how did you know we needed Celsius instead of Fahrenheit?”

Me: “Uh… that was Fahrenheit.”

Girl #2: *laughs at her friend* “Wow! Now this girl probably thinks we’re stupid! Good job!”

A Thick Slice Of Humble Pie, Part 2

| MO, USA | At The Checkout, Food & Drink, Math & Science, Money

(I’m working at the cash register of a pizza place. A customer storms in and demands his pizza.)

Me: “Sorry, sir, it seems I don’t have anything in here by that name or phone number. Are you sure you called the right store?”

Customer: “YES! The person who took my order refused to honor this coupon, and so I hung up on them!”

Me: “Well, sir, that’s probably why it isn’t in here. Should I place a new order?”

Customer: “Fine! But I want it delivered to my house!”

(The customer proceeds to place the order, as more customers are lining up and watching the spectacle. I read him the final total.)

Customer: “That’s not the total! What is wrong with you people?! Can’t anyone do math? It says here I get two pizzas for $11.95.”

Me: “Actually sir, it’s two pizzas for $11.95 each. Do you still want to place the order?”

(Everyone is watching at this point. The customer throws the coupon at me.)

Customer: “WHAT DOES THIS SAY?”

Me: “Two pizzas for $11.95 each, no limit, expires [date].”

(The customer’s tail is between his legs, and he’s red with embarrassment. With an entire crowd watching, he reluctantly mumbles and pays the bill.)

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A Thick Slice Of Humble Pie