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Category: Liars & Scammers

Ever come across a customer that has made you want to call the police? These ones pretty much ensure it. It goes way beyond the realms of shoplifting or threatening behavior. Some of these customers are too stupid even for those…

Fits The Bill Of A Criminal

| England, UK | At The Checkout, Criminal & Illegal, Holidays, Liars & Scammers, Money, Theme Of The Month

(A couple of years back I worked as a Christmas temp at a major supermarket during a year off from university course. It is in the middle of a very busy shift.)

Customer: *walks up to checkout with two very expensive electrical items*

Me: “Hello, sir.” *scans items* “That will be £380 please.”

Customer: *hands me a wad of £20 notes*

Me: “Thank you very much.”

(I start to count money out in front of him while also checking each note for authenticity.)

Customer: *suddenly aggressive* “What are you doing?”

Me: “I have to check that this is the correct amount of money and it is our policy to ensure that all notes are genuine. I do the same for all notes I get handed.”

Customer: *grabs notes and starts to count them out in front of me quickly*

Me: “Sir, I need to count the money myself so I can check each note.”

Customer: “I am not a criminal!”

Me: *getting suspicious* “I am not saying you are, sir. I am only doing my job as thoroughly as I can. Sometimes fake notes can be picked up by accident and the person who has them is not aware they are fake. But if I were to allow one into the till it could be passed to another customer and at that point the shop would have committed a criminal offence and could be held liable. I need to check the notes.”

(I pick up the notes and start to check them again.)

Customer: “I AM NOT A CRIMINAL!”

(The manager comes over at the noise.)

Me: “Please calm down, sir!”

Manager: “[My Name], what is going on?!”

Me: “This gentleman is not allowing me to check and count his money.”

Manager: “Please calm down, sir, or we will have to call security.”

Customer: *screaming at the top of his lungs* “I AM NOT A CRIMINAL! WHY ARE YOU TREATING ME LIKE THIS?! I WILL F****** SLIT YOUR THROAT, YOU F****** B****!”

(Security came running over and the customer was restrained. When we checked his money all but £100 of it was fake. The police were called.)

A Slight Blip On The Double-Dip

, | Baltimore ,MD, USA | Home Improvement, Liars & Scammers

(A customer comes into the store and orders a large amount of building supplies to build a shed. She is helped and checked out by me. Her brother comes for the items a few hours later, and I load them up. She calls back the next day.)

Customer: “Hello. I’m coming to pick up my order today, and just want to make sure it’s ready.”

Me: “Not a problem, ma’am. What is the name and phone number attached to the order? ”

Customer: “It’s [Name] and [phone number].”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, it appears your order was already picked up by your brother.”

Customer: “What? My brother? I don’t have a brother. Someone stole my merchandise!”

(When she placed her order with me, she told me her brother’s name and that he would be picking it up. This was listed on her order at the time of purchase by me.)

Me: “Hmm. No brother?”

Customer: “Let me speak to your manager! I’m an only child!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I’m not going to do that for you.”

Customer: “What…?”

Me: “See, when I first answered the phone I stated my name. When running this double dip scam in the future, please note the name of the person you’re dealing with. I not only helped you with the purchase and rang you up. I also loaded your brother’s truck with the merchandise. [Brother’s Name]. I also checked his id, first and last name. I hope this is all clear as I would hate to repeat myself and waste any more of my time.”

Customer: “I… what is your name?!”

Me: “We here at [Store] thank you for your business and your continued support. Please do not hesitate to shop again with us. And can you do me a favor?”

Customer: “…what?”

Me: “Have a lovely day.”

(Her brother returned the next day to return the merchandise. He was denied.)

Opinion-Hated

| NY, USA | Bad Behavior, Home Improvement, Liars & Scammers

(I work at a very high-end store. One of the perks we enjoy is that every year we get exclusive collections of expensive clothing, furniture, and other household items that you wouldn’t be able to find anywhere else. On this particular day a woman storms up to my register brandishing a piece of silverware from one such collection.)

Woman: “Hey, do you have any more of these in stock?”

Me: “Certainly, ma’am. We just got a fresh shipment in last week.”

Woman: “Good, I’ll take two sets to be delivered to my apartment. And be quick about it! I have to catch a train in ten minutes!”

(Ignoring her abrasive attitude, I quickly and efficiently ring her up, get her shipping details, and log the silverware to be sent off. She then practically rips the receipt out of my machine the instant it’s printed and runs out of my area. I think nothing more of this and go back to tidying the shelves up when, around an hour later, I get paged to help someone in the kitchen area nearby. Upon walking over I discover the same woman being helped by one of my co-workers.)

Coworker: “Ah, [My Name], this woman here is wondering if we have any pots and pans that match the silverware she just purchased from you. Thought you might be able to help her out with that. She’s in a bit of a hurry.”

(The woman looks at me and promptly turns sheet white.)

Me: “Hello again! Um… did your train get delayed?”

Coworker: “Train? No, she said she had a dental appointment.”

Me: “Oh… well, I’m sorry. I heard train and—”

(The woman promptly cuts me off with an agonizing scream.)

Woman: “Okay I admit it! I hate your f****ing store and every d*** s***-head that works here! If I had my way I’d have had this whole block demolished decades ago, but you’re the only place that carries [Designer] brand exclusive items so I’m trying to just get my stuff and get out of here as quick as possible so I don’t have to spend too long speaking to you f***ers! There, you happy now?!”

Me: *stunned* “Well… uh… not really, but if it helps at all you don’t have to lie to us like that. We can handle the occasional low opinion.”

Woman: “Burn in Hell!” *storms out*