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Category: Language & Words

This category features customers whose mishandling of vocabulary and grammar are so bad that we literally have no words to describe them!

No Problem Is A Problem

| Brighton, England, UK | Bad Behavior, Language & Words

(I notice an elderly man looking a little confused while browsing. I approach him to see if he needs any help.)

Me: “Hello, sir, can I help you at all?”

Man: “No, no. It’s ok; you don’t have what I want.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. What was it you were looking for?”

Man: “It’s all right. I’ll go somewhere else.”

Me: “Okay, sir, no problem.”

Man: *suddenly irate* “No problem? No problem? Of course there’s a bloody problem! I can’t find what I want!”

Me: “I.. I’m sorry, sir. I just meant it as an expression.”

Man: “You people! Why do you have to say such stupid things!”

Me: “Again, I’m very sorry, sir. I didn’t mean to offend.”

(He gave me a snarling look then walked off muttering, “No problem? No bloody problem?” I stood there for a few seconds just staring at the back of his head as he left, completely dumbfounded!)

Taste Of Your Own Fast Acting Medicine

| NC, USA | At The Checkout, Food & Drink, Language & Words

Customer: “I want a number-one-medium-with-a-coke-and-a-large-frosty-with-a-kids-meal-chicken-nuggets-and-apple-slices-and-orange-juice—”

Me: “M—”

Customer: “—also-a-number-seven-with-a-diet-coke-large-and-an-apple-salad.”

(Fortunately I am able to type all of that in and keep up with her despite that and speak it back to her just as fast as she had said it.)

Me: Okay…so you want a number-one-medium-with-a-coke-and-a-large-frosty-with-a-kids-meal-chicken-nuggets-and-apple-slices-and-orange-juicealso-a-number-seven-with-a-diet-coke-large-and-an-apple-salad?”

Customer: “Wait… what?”

A Very Unfortunate Vocabulary

| Limerick, Ireland | Extra Stupid, Language & Words

Me: “Because it’s too close to your renewal date, we won’t be able to change your plan now, but at the end of the week we will.”

Customer: “So there’s nothing you can do for me now?”

Me: “Unfortunately not, no.”

Customer: “Right. And you know that word you keep using, ‘Unfortunately.'”

Me: “Yes?”

Customer: “I’d like you to put through some feedback to your complaints department; it’s not a real word. I don’t know who’s been doing your training or whatever, but ‘Unfortunately’ is not in the dictionary.” *click*