Category: Home Improvement

Stupid customers still have to live somewhere. While we applaud them for sometimes wanting to make the place look nice, please don’t assume flat-pack furniture comes ready out of the box, or that power-tools are named as such because they need power! They make Tim The Toolman Taylor look like Frank Gehry!

Too Late For That Lightbulb Moment

| Canada | Extra Stupid, Home Improvement

(A customer comes to the returns desk and slams down a doorknob.)

Customer: *rudely* “I would like to return this light bulb.”

Me: *pause* “Do you have the light bulb or did you mean this doorknob here?”

Customer: *rolls her eyes and says* “I meant to say doorknob, obviously”.

(All I could think was “I hope you didn’t think this was a light bulb that didn’t work.” Either way, it made my day!)

Unable To Saw Through That Attitude

| New Brunswick, NJ, USA | Bizarre, Home Improvement

Customer: *holding two saws* “What’s better, [Brand #1] or [Brand #2] saws?”

Employee: “What are you looking to cut?”

Customer: *suddenly angry* “None of your f***ing business, bro! Just tell me which saw is better?”

Employee: “Well, [Brand #1] is a wood saw, and [Brand #2] is a hacksaw, so which is better depends on what you’re trying to cut.”

Customer: “Didn’t I just tell you to mind your own business?” *to me* “Can you believe the people that work here? Which if these looks better to do?”

Me: “[Brand #1] looks like a hacksaw and [Brand #2] looks like a wood saw.”

Customer: “Okay, f*** this. I’m going to [Other Hardware Store] and buying a chainsaw.”

Employee: “The wood saw’s probably better, then.”

Customer: *suddenly friendly* “So [Brand #2]? Okay, then! Thanks for your help!”

Not Feeling Neutral About Those Colors

| New Zealand | Home Improvement

(I have a customer in our specials book to call when we receive new stock of a certain style of shoe in. We have a note by her name that said ‘likes navy and grey.’ Like a lot of people that shop with us, she obviously likes neutral tones that go with everything. I ring her yesterday when we receive a new shipment in grey. When I tell her, she says, ‘oh, grey,’ in a disappointed voice.)

Customer: “I was hoping for a bit of colour.”