Category: Holidays

Even during the holidays, customers don’t seem to take a break. With that many extra light-bulbs around you’d think a few extra would appear above their heads?

Independent From The Closing Times

| Daphne, AL, USA | Crazy Requests, Holidays

Me: “How may I direct your call?”

Customer: “Yeah, are you guys closing early for Independence Day?”

Me: “We are. We close at eight.”

Customer: “But I don’t know if I can get there in time, and I really need something!”

Me: “Well, I’m sorry, but we close at eight.”

Customer: “But you can stay open for me, right? I spend thousands of dollars there! It’s not like you’re all going to do anything after eight anyway!”

Me: “I’m very sorry, sir, but I still can’t let you in if you get here after the store is closed. No one can.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous. And you can’t make any exceptions?”

Me: “Not unless you’re Johnny Depp.”

Customer: “D****it!”

His Valentine Is Going To Be Pissed

| UT, USA | Holidays, Hotels & Lodging, Popular

Me: “Hello, this is [Hotel]. How can I help you?”

Caller: “Yeah, I need a room this weekend.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, we’re completely booked this weekend.”

Caller: *annoyed* “Why would you be sold out? That makes no sense.”

Me: “It’s a holiday weekend?”

Caller: “You can’t be serious! Nobody cares about President’s Day!”

Me: “Valentine’s Day as well?”

Caller: “OH, S***, I FORGOT!” *click*

The Holidays Just Flasher By

| CT, USA | Holidays

(For Halloween, the grocery store I work at allows employees to come to work in a costume. On a tight budget, I had dressed like a 1930’s reporter, complete with the notepad in the fedora and a trench coat that went down to my ankles. (It should be noted I am a 6’3″ male.) A middle aged woman comes to my register, a concerned expression on her face.)

Me: “Happy Halloween, miss. May I see your rewards card?”

Customer: *serious tone* “Are you dressed as a flasher?”

(I’ve had customers ask if I’m everything from a private eye to a crooked lawyer.)

Me: *the trench coat is unbuttoned, with my shirt and pants visible on the middle of my chest* “Miss… if I were dressed as a flasher, the jacket would be closed.”

Customer: “Oh…”

(She went along the rest of the transaction seeming rather disappointed in my reply.)

It’s Been A Hard Year

| USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Holidays

(The customer approaches the register, puts out an open bag of licorice, and a receipt.)

Customer: “I bought it for Easter and it was hard as a rock.”

(The receipt is dated for March the year before.)

Me: “Ma’am, it’s over 30 days. I can’t return this.”

Customer: *yelling* “But I bought it for Easter!”

Actually Looking Forward To Monday

| Idyllwild, CA, USA | Extra Stupid, Holidays, Popular

Caller: “Hello. I’m trying to plan for the upcoming holidays and I don’t have a calendar. I need to know what day of the week Easter Sunday is on this year.”

Me: *thinking she was looking for the date* “It’s on April 8th.”

Caller: “I know the DATE, but what day of the WEEK is it?”

Me: “What day of the week is Easter SUNDAY?”

Caller: “Yes.”

Me: “Is that a trick question, ma’am?”

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