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Category: Holidays

Even during the holidays, customers don’t seem to take a break. With that many extra light-bulbs around you’d think a few extra would appear above their heads?

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Black Friday Is A Completely Different Horror Story

| CA, USA | Holidays

(I am working on Halloween which happens to be on a Friday this year.)

Me: “Here you go, sir! Any exciting plans for Halloween?”

Customer: “Well, the family is going to several parties tonight so I need my coffee so I can stay up late.”

Me: “At least Halloween is on a Friday this year; that means everyone can crash tomorrow!”

Customer: “But what happens to Black Friday when Halloween is on a Friday?”

Me: “What do you mean?”

Customer: “I haven’t seen any advertisements for Black Friday this year! It’s like they forgot all about it because Halloween is on a Friday!”

Me: “Black Friday is on the Friday after Thanksgiving… not Halloween.”

Customer: “So it’s not after Halloween?”

Me: “No…”

Customer: “Oh, okay, have a nice day!”

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This Trick Works A Treat

| Lynnwood, WA, USA | Holidays

(I work at a large retail store. After Halloween, Halloween decor, costumes, and candies are marked down, decor at 50% and candy at 30% respectively. I have stayed late to cover for a call out.)

Me: “Hey, did you find everything all right?”

Customer: “Yes, perfectly.”

(I proceed to ring up the items in the basket all of which are Halloween markdowns.)

Me: “Okay that will be $19.67.”

Customer: “Wait, those LED trees were supposed to be 50% off at the register.”

(I look and the original price is thirteen dollars and they are marked down in the system to $6.50.)

Me: “Yes. They are 50% off.”

Customer: “No! they were supposed to be 50% off at the register!”

Me: “Well, it is 50% off.”

Customer: “If they aren’t 50% at the register then we don’t want them.”

(Trying not to roll my eyes I void the items and put them in the go back bin.)

Me: “Okay, the total is 12 dollars.”

Customer: “The candy was 30% off at the register!”

(I look at the line growing behind them and price check every candy and find that yes, they all are 30% off. I offer to give them a dollar off just to get them out of my hair and they refuse, wanting the 30% off, so I call my manager.)

Manager: “Hey, what’s the problem?”

(They explain the issue and like me she checks and finds everything in order.)

Customer: “But it’s 30% off at the register.”

Manager: *sounding more than a little annoyed at this point* “If I give you five dollars off then would you be happy?”

Customer: “Hmmm, I guess.”

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You Are The Reason We Need A Holiday

| Oslo, Norway | Holidays, Transportation

(I’m the owner of a small auto garage. In Norway it is common for most people to have their summer holiday in July. It’s also common that most businesses close down for the time, and so do we. I get a phone call on the 29th of June, two days before the summer holiday season.)

Me: “Hello, this is [Company]. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Hi, I’m a customer at [Competing Garage] but they are closing for summer holiday on Friday and can not help me. Can you?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but we are also closing on Friday and have more than enough to do serving our own customers.”

Customer: “Okay, do you know anyone that can help me?”

Me: “I’m sorry, my best advice is that you go to Yellow Pages –” *business register* “– and call around to see if anyone can help you.”

(The customer totally exploded and yelled at me.)

Customer: “Why the h*** is it so difficult to get some help with my car? It’s not a f****** human right to have holiday in July!”

Me: “What’s the rush? Why do you have to have your car serviced now?

Customer: “We are going on holiday this Friday!”

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Customers Like This Is Why You Need A Holiday

| Germany | Crazy Requests, Holidays, Hotels & Lodging

(Every year, we close the hotel for our annual holiday for 4-5 weeks mid-November to mid-December. This is widely published everywhere. We have a promotion with a well-known tour operator who issues vouchers for a menu for two. We get very little money for these vouchers, but it is good publicity and people have to book in advance for a date that suits both parties.)

Caller: “I have a voucher from [Tour Company], and I would like to book a table for [date].”

Me: “Sorry, that date is during our annual holiday. The hotel is closed at that time.”

Caller: “But I so wanted to come and eat at your restaurant.”

Me: “Sorry, we are closed at that time of year; can I offer you a booking for another date?”

Caller:“No, I want that date. Why is that not possible?”

Me: “The hotel is dark and cold, there are no supplies, the cold storage and everything is switched off, and the staff is on holiday.”

Caller: “Well, can’t you come back from holiday and open the restaurant for me?”

Me: “Sorry, but it is just logistically not possible.”

Caller:“That is lousy customer service. I demand you open your restaurant for me on that date I want.”

Me: “You expect me to fly back from Turkey on day eight of my two-week sightseeing tour, to reopen the hotel especially so you can have dinner with your voucher?”

Caller: “Yes! Now, that was not so hard, was it?”

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Fire Doesn’t Work

| Fort Worth, TX, USA | Bizarre, Extra Stupid, Holidays

(It is the 4th of July and we close at 10 pm. A regular couple has been sitting in the lobby eating for 30 minutes after close. All the employees have been listening to the fireworks explode right over our heads, as the show is just down the block.)

Customers: *gets up to leave, sees a firework* “Oh, is that what those sounds are?”

Me: “…”

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