Category: Holidays

Even during the holidays, customers don’t seem to take a break. With that many extra light-bulbs around you’d think a few extra would appear above their heads?

Hallaaaargh-ween!

| San Antonio, TX, USA | Holidays

(As I’m working, a customer approaches and asks if I can help him find pirate-themed clothes for his granddaughter. He shows me some pictures, and I get the idea that he really likes pirates.)

Customer: “You probably think I’m weird. You probably don’t even know that September 19th is…”

Me: “Talk Like a Pirate Day?”

Customer: “Yes! Okay, we’re buddies now.”

(He hugged me, and wandered off towards our Halloween supplies. A bit odd, but I was smiling for the rest of the day!)

The Devil Wears Costumes

| WV, USA | Holidays

(My best friend works in a seasonal Halloween store in our town. Since it’s only open for a little over a month each year, and the sister store is a 45 minute drive away, they can get a lot of business most days. A mutual friend and I go to her work to hang out and look around while we wait for her to get off. The staff is small, but we’re all very close. One of her coworkers has just gotten off the phone and huffs, noticeably irritated.)

Mutual Friend: “Angry customer?”

Worker: “It’s this woman I’ve been trying to contact about a costume. She needed a size for it we didn’t have, so we had to get it from our store in [Town 45 minutes away] and she didn’t answer our call yesterday so I left a message, except she never called back. So I called her again when we opened this morning and she’s just now getting to me demanding why I’m bothering her. I say, if you want the costume you need to get it today or I have to put it on the shelves for others to look at. It’s a very popular costume this year, and she says she’ll stop by when she’s ready.”

Owner: “You can’t please everyone. We have policies like this for a reason. I can’t tell you how many people want us to hold items but never get them.”

(Fast forward about an hour. The store closes in twenty minutes at nine pm when a pair of young women walk in and head straight for the service counter. It’s obvious this is the woman on the phone and we watch her snatch the costume bag from the coworker’s hands. Our friend is manning the changing rooms and walks over.)

Friend Working: “Ma’am? Can I suggest you try the costume real quick before checking out? Just to make sure everything fits comfortably?”

Woman: *snottily* “Well, why? Like, I already know it fits me.”

Coworker: “It’s just that our policy states all sales are final. We don’t do any returns or exchanges so if something is wrong or missing from the outfit, we need to know now so you’re getting everything you wanted.”

Woman: “Ugh, FINE!” *stomps over to the fitting rooms*

(I’m sitting on the floor with our mutual friend watching the exchange. We’ve made our purchases, most of the lights in the store are off, and other workers are sweeping or unplugging their props for the night. The woman and her friend then spend the remaining time in the front mirror outside the changing rooms loudly gossiping and complaining.)

Woman: “I don’t see why I have to do this. If I don’t like it, I’ll get my money back. It’s just a cheap costume anyway.”

Woman’s Friend: “Like, yeah! As if we weren’t already busy. Whatever.”

(Almost fifteen minutes after the store should have closed for the night, the woman finally gets dressed, buys the outfit and leaves in a huff. My friend grabs her jacket, clocks out, and practically RUNS to our car.)

Me: “Wow, [Friend], I thought I got all the horrible people at my job!”

Friend Working: “That’s not even the half of it. We get people like that ALL the time. Even people who try to come in December and call [Owner] as if he should even be open then to sell Halloween stuff!”

Mutual Friend: “They were some straight up b****es.”

Friend Working: “I would have said something if they weren’t going to buy it, but whatever. That’s not even the worst part. When she went to the counter to pay, she demanded a discount for the trouble we caused HER. She said we owed her for ruining her day-off by having to come in and pick up her order.”

An A-Moose-ing Interaction

| Gatineau, QC, Canada | Bizarre, Holidays, Pets & Animals

(It is Halloween. My father and I want to get new licenses for the family car he is giving me. My father is wearing a moose costume and the lady at the desk is dressed as a devil. I do not wear a costume.)

Lady: “Hello, how can I help you today?”

Father: “Hi, we would like to get new plates for her.”

Lady: “Very well. *to me* “Here are the forms to fill.” *to my father* “Are you a moose or a deer?”

Father: “Wait, let me check…” *he places his hands around his mouth in a cup position* “MOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

(The lady, I, and the whole waiting area where people are sitting, have eyes wide open and dropped jaws.)

Father: “Yep, I believe I am a moose!”

Supervisor: *coming over* “[Lady], is everything okay?”

Lady: *cracking up laughing* “I believe a moose sang me a love song.”

Supervisor: “Did you moose-sing back to him?”

Me: *face-palm*

The Worst Cookies In London

| Nashville, TN, USA | Food & Drink, Holidays

(It’s the Sunday before Halloween. As our store hours are shorter on Sundays, the store owners have allowed all the employees to dress up in costume and play PG movies on the television in the dining area. My best friend and I are dressed up as Sarah Williams and Jareth the Goblin King from the 1986 film Labyrinth. About twenty minutes into the film, I’m approached by a customer and her friend. She glances at the movie, sizes up my Jareth costume, and immediately breaks out into song:)

Customer: “You remind me of the babe!”

Me: *elated* “What babe?”

Customer: “The babe with the power!”

Me: “What power?”

Customer: “The power of Voodoo!”

Me: “Who do?”

Customer: “You do!”

Me: “Do what?”

Customer: “Remind me of the babe!”

Me: *laughing* “That just made my day! You’re definitely my favorite customer! Would you like a free cookie?”

Customer: *still smiling* “Chocolate chip, please!”

Customer’s Friend: “I don’t get it…”

Coworker: “It’s from the movie we have playing.” *she gestures at the TV*

Customer’s Friend: *pointing at our coworker in the back, who works in production* “Is she from the movie, too…?”

Me: “No, she’s dressed up as Mrs. Lovette from ‘Sweeney Todd’.”

Customer: *chuckles* “I hope she didn’t bake my cookie…”

Customer’s Friend: *still confused* “Who…?”

Me: “She… bakes people into pies.”

Customer’s Friend: *horrified* “And you’re letting her work in the BACK?!”

They All Come Out On Halloween

| Port St Lucie, FL, USA | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink, Holidays

(It is seven am, Halloween morning, during the start of our breakfast rush. We park two cars, one for a large order and one for two hash browns.)

Employee: *comes back inside after bringing the two bags out to the cars* “I think you guys handed me the wrong order. The woman gave me a receipt for a large order but the man said he didn’t have two hash browns either. The man stuck the bag with the big order between his legs. I asked for the receipt and food but he wouldn’t give me either.”

Man: *on cue* “I want my f****** food! I got the wrong order!”

Employee: “I was trying to get the receipt, sir, but can we get the bag back?”

Man: *in a smug tone* “Oh, bite me.”

Me: “Okay, sir; just let me see your receipt and I will gladly get it to you.”

Man: “I JUST WANT MY F****** FOOD!”

Me: “I understand, sir. I can go ahead and print the receipt for you if you’d like. Just let me know what items you had and I can get it for you.”

Man: “Are you f****** kidding me? JUST GIVE ME MY FOOD!”

Me: “Sir, I will. I just need to know what you had so I can get it for you.”

Man: “This is f****** stupid. You won’t give me my food!” *stomps out of the store, never bringing the bag with the wrong order back*

Woman: *comes inside* “I’ve been waiting for my order for a while now.”

Me: *utterly perplexed* “I… I believe that man just left with your food. But don’t worry, ma’am, I’ve got it for you.”

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