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Category: Health & Body

Stupid customers in stories are bad enough. However, dealing with a customer’s health issues may be hazardous to your own health! Please consult your doctor before continuing.

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The Dining Table Is Where Food Goes In, Not Out

| IL, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Family & Kids, Health & Body, Popular

(I have a large group, 20 or so people. They are regulars and pleasant customers, so I am happy to be serving them throughout the evening. They stay for two hours in our dining room, no big deal; they are spending money, having a good time, and they are the only people in the dining hall. Everyone else is in the bar dining room. Most of the group has left, except a woman, her husband, and their probably one-year-old child, being breast-fed. I have no problems with her breast-feeding, no one is offended, no one is there to be offended and she has a blanket over herself, but then the woman proceeds to change her child in the dining room on the table.)

Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be rude, and it has been a real pleasure serving you all tonight, but do you mind if I ask that you change your baby in the restroom where we provide a baby changing station. If you’re uncomfortable, we do have sanitation wipes for the station?”

Customer: “Excuse me?! I do mind! My child needs to be changed now. No one else is in this room. Am I disturbing other customers?”

Me: “Again, not to be rude, and I understand that you’re just trying to take care of your child. I’m not personally offended, and no one has complained, but keep in mind we serve food to people on these tables, and it’s just not sanitary.”

Customer: “You’re being very judgmental about this. It’s just a baby. No one else has complained, and I have a mat down. I don’t see why you’re having such a problem with this.”

Me: “I understand where you’re coming from, but again, this isn’t about complaints. It’s about sanitation. If you could please, from now on, make use of the changing station in the women’s restroom, I and management would be grateful.”

(At this point she has almost finished changing her baby, and management supports me in my request for a sanitary dining table.)

Customer: “I’ve done this countless times here. We’re regulars, and no one ever complains. I don’t appreciate you causing a scene.”

(There are no other customers in the dining room. They are all in the bar room. No scene was caused. No one even looked.)

Me: “I’m not trying to cause problems. I’m just making a request that, to help keep this place clean, you use the resources we provide to change diapers.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous. We’re leaving. I don’t even want to leave you a tip. You’re just a mean girl who hates children. You probably don’t have any children at home.”

(The guest paid and leaves. There was no tip, which I understood. It didn’t bother me that much because there was a disagreement and sometimes that happens. What bothered me is that she left the dirty diaper on the table, not even wrapped up.)

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You Can’t Drink Yourself Out Of This Problem

| NJ, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Health & Body

Customer: “What is in your gold margarita?”

(I tell her and she orders one. Five minutes later…)

Customer: “This has a very rustic taste to it.”

Me: “You don’t like it?”

Customer: “It’s like… rustic.”

Me: “Is it too sour? Or too sweet?”

Customer: “It’s very rustic.”

(We go around and around like this until I determine what she means to say is metallic.)

Customer: “Drink it and see what I mean. Get a straw.”

Me: “I’m not going to do that, sorry. I’ll make you a new one or something different though.” *I am visibly pregnant, I should add*

Customer: “Honey, it’s not going to kill you. You should be tasting every drink you send out. Your baby will be fine. Get a straw.”

Me: “I will make you a new margarita.”

Customer: “Taste it first. We gotta work something out here because I can’t drink rustic things.”

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The White Thing To Say

| Medicine Hat, AB, Canada | Bizarre, Health & Body

(I am naturally very, very pale. I am also usually cold, so I tend to wear long sleeves nearly all the time. On this hot summer day, I came to work in short sleeves.)

Regular Customer: “Wow, I’ve never seen your arms before! They’re so… white!”

Me: “Thanks?”