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Category: Health & Body

Stupid customers in stories are bad enough. However, dealing with a customer’s health issues may be hazardous to your own health! Please consult your doctor before continuing.

Not Quite Swimming In Emergencies

| Boise, ID, USA | Crazy Requests, Family & Kids, Health & Body

(I work at the front desk of a pediatrician’s office during their evening hours. This call comes in around 4:30 pm.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Office]. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Caller: “Yes, my daughter is incredibly sick I need to get her in right away.”

Me: “Of course. Can you tell me what is going on?”

Caller: “She is very congested, maybe a sinus or an ear infection. I’m worried about her breathing. I need to get her in as soon as possible. This is very urgent!”

Me: “I understand, but our providers have finished seeing patients for the day. We have a doctor on-call doctor who will be coming in this evening. I can schedule you for 6:30 pm if you are comfortable waiting until then.”

Caller: “Oh, no, that won’t work at all. She has swim lessons at six.”

The Test Is Inconclusive

| Bergen, Norway | Bizarre, Health & Body

(I work as a headmaster and one day drive to the local mall during lunch. One of the teachers asks to ride with me as she has an errand to run. When we get to the mall we split up, and then we meet up at the car a little later to go back to the school. The teacher is nine months pregnant when this happens.)

Teacher: *suddenly laughs, apparently for no reason*

Me: “What?”

Teacher: “I just realized why the shop assistant at the chemist was looking at me as if I am completely nuts!”

Me: “Why?”

Teacher: “Well, one of the girls in my class was really worried that she might be pregnant, and I offered to get a pregnancy test for her. So there I came, waddling in with my huge belly, and I asked where the pregnancy tests were. The look the guy gave me was priceless!”

An Automatic Autistic Response

| CA, USA | At The Checkout, Extra Stupid, Health & Body

(I work at a retail store. We are having a donation opportunity for the month of May where customers can donate money toward autism research. We are supposed to ask every customer if they would like to donate. I finish ringing this customers items up.)

Me: “And would you like to put a dollar towards autism research?”

Customer: “You know, kids would stop getting autism if they stopped all that vaccinating.”

Me: “…have a nice day, sir.”