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Category: Health & Body

Stupid customers in stories are bad enough. However, dealing with a customer’s health issues may be hazardous to your own health! Please consult your doctor before continuing.

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Intelligence Is Not In Their Blood

, | Morinville, AB, Canada | Health & Body

(A friend and I are at a local trade show, and there’s a booth from the blood clinic there. The nurse is explaining what they do, and even do a quick blood test so you can learn your blood type. As we’re chatting with her, she tell us about this one person who came by her booth earlier that day to get tested.)

Man: “Dude, I hope I have the rarest blood type!”

Nurse: “If you do, I’m going to throw you in my car and take you over to the clinic to donate a pint right now!”

Man: “WHAT? Why would you do that to me?”

Nurse: “Think about it. The rarest blood type is the type we need the most.”

Man: “Oh. Then, I hope I have the most common type.”

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Closing Time Came Earlier For You

| Solihull, England, UK | Bad Behavior, Health & Body, Popular, Time

(I am on the shop floor with my mum, who has come to meet me on my lunch break. Due to a combination of the hot weather and having skipped breakfast, out of nowhere I faint. My mum puts me in the recovery position and some of my colleagues start to come over to see if I’m OK. Amidst the commotion, a customer comes over, sees my uniform, and bends over to where I am LYING ON THE FLOOR.)

Customer: “Excuse me, what time do you close today?”

Me: *too woozy and shocked to think of another response* “4:30.”

(The customer walked off without even a thank you.)

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Asking Laboriously

| UK | Crazy Requests, Health & Body

(I run a small online business, and my most recent customer’s order has encountered a problem with shipping. While in the middle of trying to organise getting the customer’s item shipped to him, my partner starts going into labour. I throw together a quick message to the customer to explain the situation.)

Me: “Unfortunately you’re going to need to wait for an update on your orders shipping, as my partner has just started going into labour and I’m going to be preoccupied with that for the next day or two. Rest assured I’ll get back to sorting out your items shipping as soon as possible. Once again, sorry for the delay.”

Customer: “Okay.”

(Three hours later.)

Customer: “Hey, any update on my order?”

(I’m not sure what child-birthing he’s heard of that takes less than three hours to complete and for someone to get back to work after! He sent no less than five messages over the next 24 hours asking for further updates to his order.)

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When Patients Have No Patience

| MO, USA | Health & Body, Popular, Technology

(I’m a graduate student in a university research lab in the same building as a hospital. There is no patient care in my area, but occasionally we get calls from people trying to reach the hospital staff. The lab phone rings.)

Me: “Hello, this is [Lab]. [My Name] speaking!”

(A confused, elderly man is on the line.)

Man: “You need to get someone down here right now! Those d*** men moved the clicker so I can’t get anyone to help me!”

Me: “Sir, I think you have the wrong number. This is a research lab.”

Man: “Well, I just can’t seem to find anyone. Do you people even care about your patients?”

Me: “Sir, where are you? Maybe I can get a hold of someone; I’m at [University] medical centre.”

Man: “Yes! The medical centre people! Send them quick! I’ve been waiting for hours.”

Me: “Sir, where are you? I can’t call if I don’t know where you are.”

Man: “I’ve been waiting for hours! If you people at [Hospital at other side of city] operate like this all the time, I won’t be coming back here ever again!”

Me: “Sir… I’m not there but… what is your name?”

Man: “507!”

Me: “Well, sir, I’ll see what I can do… but I suggest you keep trying to reach someone.”

(I call the hospital, explain the situation and, while giggling to herself, the receptionist forwards me to the nurses’ station. I explain to the nurse what happened…)

Me: “…and so I’m fairly certain there’s someone in room 507 who needs your help.”

Nurse: “Thank you for letting me know; we’ll go take a look.”

Me: “Sure thing, ma’am and, uh… best of luck. He didn’t sound very happy.”

Nurse: *deep sigh* “They never are.”

(Dear Mom: THIS is one of many reasons why I went for a PhD, not an MD.)

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The Mother Is The One That Got Burned

| Pasadena, CA, USA | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Health & Body, Popular

(I work at a large chain video game store and my girlfriend will come into the store close to the end of my shift almost every day. About six years ago she got into a really bad car wreck and had about seventy-five percent of her body burned and has some pretty bad scarring on her arms and face. A woman with a boy and girl, both under ten, has been staring at her for a while before she walks up to me.)

Woman: “I would like to ask for that girl to be removed.”

Me: “Why do you think she needs to leave?”

Woman: *scoffs* “Her face is scaring my kids!”

(I am fighting back the urge to scream at her because my girlfriend can clearly hear her and is very self conscious about her scars.)

Me: “I can’t tell her to leave if she hasn’t done anything.”

Woman: “I’M IN HERE TO BUY THINGS! SHE HAS JUST BEEN STANDING HERE FOR TEN MINUTES!”

(By now my girlfriend looks like she’s about to cry.)

Me: “If your kids are scared of someone who almost died then you are clearly not doing the best job at teaching them to accept people who are different!”

(We left as my girlfriend started crying. It took me almost an hour to get her to calm down.)

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