Category: Food & Drink

Stupid Customers, like the rest of us have to eat and drink. Sadly like the rest of us, they sometimes eat with the rest of us. For every waiter, server, drive-thru operator, coffee shop barista, and restaurant manager who has had to deal with fake allergies, vegetarians who don’t know the meaning of the word and idiots who have yet to understand the concept of clearly listed ingredients, we salute you!

‘That One’ Time It Almost Worked

| TX, USA | Family & Kids, Food & Drink, Popular

(A customer and her young daughter are looking at the jewelry. I go over and ask if they’d like to see any pieces.)

Customer’s Daughter: “Yes, please. Could I see the white gold ring in the box closest to you, third row, on the left?”

Me: “No problem! You know, I love how you described it to me. Most adults just wave vaguely and say ‘that one.’”

Customer: “I want to see one, too.” *waves vaguely* “That one.”

Criminals Shouldn’t Like It Too Hot

, | Houston, TX, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Popular

(I work at a very popular donut shop and work alone to close at 10 pm. It is 9:55 pm Sunday night and I have had a very crabby day. The floor is freshly mopped with wet floor sign out, half the lights are out, the back of the restaurant is dark, all the leftover donuts moved to a rolling rack. Obvious to anyone with two brain cells to rub together that the store is getting ready to close.)

Me: “Hello, how may I help you?”

Customer: *looks around for a good 2 minutes* “Yeah, ugh, can I get some HOT glazed donuts?”

(I proceed to reach for the glazed donuts on the rack.)

Customer: “No! I said the hot ones!”

Me: “Sir, it is closing time and we will not have any more made until 6:00 am. If you like there is a microwave behind you to wa—”

Customer: “No, you stupid b****! Get your lazy a** back there and make me my donuts!”

(I flip the switch to turn the lights on in the kitchen behind me.)

Me: “You see all that equipment back there? The industrial sized mixers, donut cutters the size of the interior of a Buick, and conveyor belt oven and glazer that takes up half the kitchen? You really think I am going to go back there and turn all that on to make you two hot glazed donuts?!”

Customer: “Yeah, b****! You want me to come over that counter and MAKE you?!”

Me: “I’m sorry; store is closed. I need you to leave so I can lock the doors.”

(What the customer didn’t know is during his threatening rant, the officer that came most nights for his night shift, usually earlier but was late that night, heard the whole exchange. Right before he crawled over the counter the officer grabbed him. Guy ended up having priors for assault and had a warrant for his arrest.)

Always Fresh Things To Complain About

| Independence, MO, USA | Family & Kids, Food & Drink

(I’m working register at night when a woman who appears to be in her early thirties comes in and orders a meal with fries and chicken nuggets. There are already fries made but we are waiting on the nuggets to finish cooking.)

Customer: “Can I get older fries and nuggets? I don’t want my daughter to burn her mouth.”

Me: “Well we can get you older fries but we have to wait on chicken nuggets to finish cooking.”

Customer: “But my daughter could burn her mouth if it’s fresh.”

Me: “You could wait a bit before giving it to her.”

(She continued to be mad about getting fresh chicken nuggets until she left. The first and only time I’ve seen someone complain about getting fresh food.)

That Will Not Be All

| Norman, OK, USA | At The Checkout, Food & Drink

(I am working drive-thru one night when we serve partial breakfast and lunch. Customer shows up in my camera and my sensor.)

Me: “Hi, how can I help you?”

(Customer ignores me but I’m used to this by now.)

Customer: “Hello?!”

Me: “Hello! Can I help you?”

Customer: “I want a biscuit and a hash brown.”

Me: “Is that gonna be all for you today?”

Customer: “Actually make it two biscuits.”

Me: “All right, will that be all?”

Customer: “Yeah!”

(She pulls around after I tell her the total and hands me her card. I swipe it and it runs through just fine.)

Customer: “Hey, don’t you have a special going on for a biscuit and a hash brown?

Me: *handing back her card and receipt* “Yes, ma’am, we are. I took the liberty of giving you that special, along with the second biscuit you wanted.”

Customer: “Can you add a second hash brown and get me the food for cheaper?”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but you’re order has already been paid for. If you want the second hash brown, it’d have to be at full price as I’d have to make a whole new order.”

(Her boyfriend in the car gets my attention, trying to speak over her.)

Customer #2: “Why don’t you give us a refund in the biscuit, and then ring up the special that way?”

Me: “I’m sorry, I can’t do that. I’m not supposed to give out refunds.”

Customer #1: “Well, why didn’t you tell me at the speaker that if I got a second hash brown, I’d be getting it cheaper?!”

Me: “That’s not what you told me you wanted…”

Didn’t Study The Deal Hard Enough

| Newcastle, England, UK | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Money, School

(I work in a popular fast food restaurant in the city centre. I am working a morning shift and a customer comes up to my till just after nine am and orders two breakfast meals. I ask her how she would like to pay and she informs me she will be paying by card.)

Me: “Not a problem. Please just insert your card into that machine there.”

(I indicate the correct machine and turn around to begin assembling the order, but am distracted by her shout.)

Customer: “Excuse me! This machine isn’t working!”

Me: “I’m ever so sorry. Please just try again. Sometimes our system is a little temperamental. It should work this time.”

(After several more attempts the card has not worked and the food is ready so I ask to see the card; although she is speaking with a local accent some foreign cards don’t work with our system and I think it best to check. On observing, I see that she has been trying to use a student ID card.)

Me: “Uh, excuse me, but you’ve been trying to use a student card. You need to use a debit or credit card, or pay by cash if you’d prefer.”

Customer: “But you can use these!”

Me: “I’m afraid you can’t, madam; there is no way of paying with a student card.”

Customer: “But I want my meal for free!”

(My company runs a promotion where if you buy a meal and present student ID you are entitled to a free cheeseburger or ice cream, but this is only available after 10:30 am when main menu is being served, and does not entitle you to your whole meal for free, which I endeavour to explain to the now irate customer.)

Customer: “So you mean I can’t have my meals for free?”

Me: “No. Like I said, that promotion doesn’t run during breakfast, and even if it did you don’t get your whole meal free. You have to buy it and you get a free cheeseburger or ice cream after.”

Customer: “Well, they’ve been lying to us then! F***this!”

(The customer then left the store, leaving the food on the counter which had to be recorded as waste. I never found out who ‘they’ were.)

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