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Category: Food & Drink

Stupid Customers, like the rest of us have to eat and drink. Sadly like the rest of us, they sometimes eat with the rest of us. For every waiter, server, drive-thru operator, coffee shop barista, and restaurant manager who has had to deal with fake allergies, vegetarians who don’t know the meaning of the word and idiots who have yet to understand the concept of clearly listed ingredients, we salute you!

Trouble Brewing, Part 7

, | VT, USA | Food & Drink

Customer: “Do you have iced tea?”

Me: “Um, yes, we have lots of kinds of iced tea. Are you looking for a single-serving bottle or for a big bottle?”

Customer: “What? No, I just want iced tea.”

Me: “Um, okay, sure. There are a lot of coolers around the store that hold chilled drinks. You can find some at the other end of this aisle here, or at the other end of this one here, facing the meat and seafood. Or there are big bottles held at room temperature in the juice aisle, or—”

Customer: “No, no. What? I just want some iced tea! Some iced tea, just like you have the iced coffee!” *he gestures to some large self-service carafes which hold strong coffee to be poured over cups of ice*

Me: “Oh, you mean you want it to be brewed in-house? I’m sorry; we don’t sell it that way here.”

Customer: “No, I don’t want it brewed in-house. What?”

Me: “Okay, so you want a bottle of iced tea?”

Customer: “No! I just want to buy a cup of iced tea!”

Me: “Uh, okay… I’m sorry, I’m really trying to understand you, but I’m just not sure what you’re asking for. Sometimes a store sells iced tea in bottles, and they’re packaged somewhere else and then we just sell them. Sometimes a store sells iced tea that they’ve brewed themselves on the premises. We only sell it in bottles that come from outside companies. There’s a cafe down the block that might sell it homemade, if that’s what you want. I can give you direc—”

Customer: “I just find it incredible that you really don’t sell just plain iced tea.”

Me: “Sir, I didn’t say that. We have plenty of iced tea.”

Customer: “I want you to stop looking at me like I’m insane for trying to get some plain iced tea!”

Me: “I’m sorry! I’m just trying to figure out how else a store could possibly sell iced tea. You don’t want it brewed elsewhere and bottled and shipped here, and you don’t want it to be brewed here in the store—”

(At this point my customer turned around and walked away, still looking completely pissed off.)

Related:
Trouble Brewing, Part 6
Trouble Brewing, Part 5
Trouble Brewing, Part 4

I Spat On Your Spatula

| NY, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(I am a student employee working at the cafeteria of my community college that I attend. I am at our fusion station serving various forms of pasta. I keep a fairly clean operation and periodically change my cooking implements as well as clean my station. After dealing with one picky customer, I run through my cleaning routine save for one skillet and spatula I have only just begun using for the previous customer. A female student walks up to the station shortly after I finish cleaning the counters.)

Me: “Hi there, how are you doing today?”

Customer: “Good. What is this?”

(This alone amused me as it was obvious what I was serving but multiple others asked me this already today so I dismissed it.)

Me: “It is a pasta bar today. Would you like some?”

Customer: “Sure.”

(She proceeds to tell me her selections but suddenly stops short when I go to use the aforementioned tools.)

Me: “Is something wrong?”

Customer: “Would you please use a different pan? I don’t want you to make my food in an infected pan.”

(This annoys me slightly but not enough for her to see. I get a new skillet out and move her meal into it and grab the spatula.)

Customer: “Uh, I’m sorry but could you please use another spatula. I don’t want that one used in my food.”

(By this time the lunch rush has begun and other customers have started to line up behind her. I run to the back to get a new spatula, come back, and set it on the counter so I can light the burner.)

Me: “Okay, ma’am, is this what you want?

Customer: “Yes, that’ll be great…”

Me: “Is there still a problem, ma’am?”

Customer: “You know what I think I’m going to pass.”

Me: “Why?”

Customer: “You can’t put a clean spatula on the counter; it’ll get germs all over it. You need to have napkins or plates stacked together to put it on so it doesn’t get infected. I’m sorry but I can’t… have a nice day.”

(The customer speeds off without another word. I’m standing there with her food half made when another female student, who had witnessed most of this, approaches me laughing.)

Me: “Okay, can someone tell me what just happened?”

Customer #2: “It’s okay; don’t get frazzled. I know that girl. Sorry about that.”

Me: “Not a problem. What can I do for you today?”

Customer #2: “You know what? I’ll just have what she was going to have.”

Our Way Or Go Away

| Canada | Bizarre, Food & Drink

(Our meals always comes with rice or noodles and is the first step in the plating process.)

Customer: “Okay! I’d like your orange chicken.”

Employee: “Great! Would you like rice or noodles to start?”

Customer: “I like to start with the orange chicken.”

Employee: “Sure! But our plates start with rice or noodles.”

Customer: *smirks, backs away, puts away his tray* “Well then, if you like it YOUR way.” *mumbles something and walks away; complains to his wife how we like it OUR way*

Not Exactly A Tray Of Sunshine

| WA, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Health & Body

(I work in an assisted living facility. We take care of elderly people who are no longer able to do everything for themselves, but are not completely incapable of overseeing their own care. I’ve only been a caregiver at the facility for about two months, and this particular resident moved into the facility about a month ago. Because of the way the facility is set up and the work they like to start new people on, I have never seen her before and have only entered this resident’s room because the caregiver assigned to her is busy, and the receptionist noticed she missed breakfast and wanted someone to check in on her. It has also snowed heavily a few days ago, something that rarely happens in our area and that road maintenance is completely unequipped to handle, so road conditions are poor and have been so for a few days.)

Me: “[Resident]? Good morning. You didn’t come down for breakfast. Can I bring you a tray?”

Resident: “No. You can take this one out.”

(She gives me a tray from her dinner the night before.)

Resident: “No one ever takes my tray in the evening. I don’t know if you’re all lazy or what, but something needs to change. No one ever checks in on me.”

Me: “I’m sorry about that. I’ll see about leaving a note to help remind everyone to come in and check on you.”

Resident: “Well, what I want to know is why they need to be reminded at all? It can’t be that you’re all bad employees. And if it is then you should have been fired a long time ago.”

Me: “I don’t know why someone would need a reminder. It could be that they haven’t added you to the list of residents to check in on yet. I don’t know how often it’s updated.”

Resident: “I’ve been here a month. When are they going to add me?”

Me: “They might have done so already. That was just a guess. Are you sure you don’t want breakfast?”

Resident: “Yes. But can you see about getting me [medication]? I only have one dose left. My daughter usually picks up my refills from a [Drug Store] in [Town], but her car can’t drive in the snow. There isn’t anyone else in the area who can get it for me.”

Me: “I’ll ask a nurse about it and see what we can do.”

Resident: “Good. I’m suffocating here.”

(At this point the receptionist phones the resident’s room. I haven’t contacted them fast enough to let them know I’m checking in on the resident, so they ask if the resident needs anything for breakfast.)

Resident: “No! I don’t want a tray. You people charge [amount] for each one you bring up and I’m already paying [amount] a month to live here and you haven’t even added me to your list.”

(She paused to listen to the receptionist again.)

Resident: “I don’t know. Just make sure this doesn’t happen again.” *hangs up phone*

Me: “W-well, is there anything else you’d like me to do for you while I’m here?”

Resident: “Yes. Would you get me some coffee and a glass of water. There’s a machine in the kitchen.”

(I fetched her coffee, at which time I couldn’t help but notice that given the state of her kitchen, she either lied about her daughter’s inability to drive in the snow or was completely capable of getting to the kitchen and handling all of the equipment in it. Pouring drinks is a minor request, and she already seemed to be in a bad mood over insufficient care, so I still got her coffee, but we’re supposed to leave tasks that a resident can do for themselves to the resident. If we always did everything for them, they could lose certain capabilities from disuse. After I left her room, I tracked down the list of residents and level of care they required. Her name was on the list, as was the explanation for her room tray problem. As per her request, no one was allowed in her room roughly 15 minutes after we typically deliver dinner trays. Those 15 minutes are also some of the busiest of the shift. The only thing preventing her from getting her tray removed was her unworkable demands.)

Won’t Be Tricked Out Of His Treat

, | Chicago, IL, USA | Awesome Workers, Food & Drink, Holidays, Theme Of The Month

(I am shopping with my parents at a home improvement store during the Halloween season. There is a skeleton on display that has candy on it.)

Dad: *reaches for candy*

Mom: “Don’t take that! It’s for display!”

Dad: “It looks like samples to me.”

(We head to the cash registers to make a purchase. A woman who appears to be the manager is with the cashier.)

Dad: “Just curious, is the candy on the Halloween display free?”

Manager: “I would expect…”

Dad: *to Mom* “Ha! I told you!”

Mom: “You gonna go back and get some?”

Dad: “Nah.”

Manager: “I’ll go get you some.”

(The manager actually goes and gets us some candy.)

Dad: “Thank you!”

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