Category: Food & Drink

Stupid Customers, like the rest of us have to eat and drink. Sadly like the rest of us, they sometimes eat with the rest of us. For every waiter, server, drive-thru operator, coffee shop barista, and restaurant manager who has had to deal with fake allergies, vegetarians who don’t know the meaning of the word and idiots who have yet to understand the concept of clearly listed ingredients, we salute you!


Not Chickening Out Or Shrimping Away

| USA | At The Checkout, Food & Drink, Liars & Scammers

(I work in a Chinese restaurant. For any of the curries you can get vegetable, chicken, beef, or shrimp. Shrimp is the most expensive option.)

Customer: “Hi, can I get the red curry with chicken?”

Me: “No problem!”

Customer: “But can you substitute the shrimp for the chicken?”

Me: “So you want red curry with shrimp?”

Customer: “No, I want red curry with chicken but I want the chicken substituted with shrimp. That way I get shrimp for the price of chicken. Get it?”

Me: “Um, it doesn’t work like that, sir.”

Customer: “Oh, please… There’s a reason I’m sitting here and you’re serving me.”


Has A Latte Demands

| VA, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

(I manage a small cafe & coffee shop in a VERY small town that happens to be close to the interstate and several universities. As such, we get a fair amount of tourist traffic, especially from the motel across the street. One early morning, when only I and a fairly new coworker are in the cafe, we notice two women, mother and adult daughter, walking over from the motel.)

Coworker: “Good morning! How can we help you today?”

Older Woman: *looks around at our tables and coffee station while her daughter stays blocking the door* “Do you have food here?”

Coworker: “Yes, we do! Our menus are right here, and we have some specials on the board over here…”

Older Woman: *interrupting* “Do you have a chai latte?”

Coworker: “Um, I don’t think so…” *looks at me for help*

Me: “Good morning! I’m afraid we don’t have lattes, as we don’t have an espresso machine or a steamer for milk. We’ve got locally roasted coffee and loose leaf teas, though.”

Older Woman: “But you don’t have a chai latte.”

Me: “No, I’m sorry.”

Older Woman: “Could you make one anyway?”

Me: “I’m afraid not. We don’t have the right kind of tea. Our teas are all from China and are unflavored.”

Older Woman: “Well, the only reason I walked all the way here from the motel was to get a chai latte.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but we don’t have any chai type tea.”

Older Woman: *makes a sour face* “Well, did you ever think about GETTING chai?” *stares at me with expectant glare*

Me: *blinks a few times*

Daughter: “Mom, let’s just go. There’s probably a [Worldwide Coffee Chain] somewhere near here.”

(They leave.)

Coworker: “Did she expect us to go out and buy some, just for her?”

Me: “Yes. Yes, she did.”


A Soup Recoup

| NY, USA | Food & Drink

(We used to serve 12 and 16 ounce soups. We switched over to just 16 ounce soups. Due to a mix up with inventory we had two different bowls, both exactly 16 ounces. One happened to be wide and short and the other narrow and tall.)

Customer: “May I have a 12 ounce soup, please.”

Me: “We now only have 16 ounce soups, is that okay?”

Customer: “Sure.”

(I go ahead and grab a bowl that Is closest to me, fill it up, and bring it over to the tray for the lady.)

Customer: “Can I have the other bowl? It holds more soup.”

Me: “Both our bowls are exactly 16 ounces; the other bowl is just shaped differently.”

Customer: “No, I always have leftover from the other bowl because it’s bigger. This one is smaller and I get less soup.”

(I go over and fill the other bowl with tap water to the top and pour it into the bowl I used for her soup in front of her; the water is filled exactly to the top, no more or less than the other bowl.)

Me: “They’re both 16 ounces. We have two cups right now because of an inventory issue.”

Customer: “But I would rather have the other bowl. It holds more because I always have left over and it’s bigger.”

(I went over and poured her soup into the other bowl, put a lid on it, and put it back on her tray for her. She paid and walked off happily.)


Their Conversation Is Sinking Low

| Olympia, WA, USA | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink

(I work at a well-known pizza chain. This particular one is also a dine in restaurant. I’m using the restroom before my shift starts. As I’m in the stall a family comes in to wash their hands.)

Customers Child: “This building must be old! These sinks aren’t nice like other places.”

Customer #1: “That or they just don’t take care of the place. Look at this the trash; it’s overflowing!”

Customer #2: “Yeah, well, every employee here is probably high as h*** the entire day.”

Customer #1: “They all look like they are and it’s legal so I wouldn’t doubt it!”

(At this point I walk out of the stall. They see my shirt with a large picture of the company logo on it. I see their eyes go big and they quickly leave after drying their hands. I have yet to say anything. The trash is a bit high with paper towels as it has been newly changed so there is still air under the bag. I press them down and wash my hands. Other than that the restroom is clean. I walk out and get my till ready for my shift while the other server is helping other tables, waiting for me to finish so she can leave. The family is sitting over at a table looking at a menu and glancing at me nervously while one of the moms is getting a salad.)

Me: *walking over to their table* “Hey, guys! How are y’all today? I just started my shift but did the last server not get your drink order yet?”

Customer #1: *slightly red* “No, not yet, but we want [gives me drink orders for everyone].”

(I went and got their drinks, came back, and noticed one of the moms had moved to the other side of the booth away from the end where she would have been next to me. She gave me slight attitude while I took their order, I assumed, expecting me to be rude because I had heard the entire conversation in the restroom. As time went on while they were there I treated them no differently than my other customers and was still happy and cheerful and helpful. She and the others seemed to relax and were eventually joking with me and interacting well. When they left they tipped me 5$ on a 20$ bill. My manager and the other employees told me I should have been rude and not as helpful but if I had I would have just proven them right. In the end I think they learned not to be so judgmental. Their conversation was not supposed to be heard by me but I’m hoping they got a new perspective.)


The Icy Wastes

| MA, USA | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Food & Drink

(I work in a popular coffee shop. We carry both iced and hot drinks, with the hot drinks being in white, opaque cups, and the iced drinks being in plastic, transparent cups. The ice is clearly visible through the plastic. Two older women approach the counter together.)

Woman #1: “I’d like a small, iced coffee, please.”

Me: “Sure!”

(I make her coffee, CLEARLY ICED; she pays and finds a seat.)

Woman #2: “I want the same thing as her.”

Me: “No problem! Exactly like hers? A small, iced coffee, black, correct?”

Woman #2: “Yes, please, dear!”

(I make her coffee and bring it back to her. She pays and seems okay with it, until she goes to pick it up.)

Woman #2: “Oh, honey, I didn’t say anything about it being cold! This is icy!”

Me: “I’m sorry; I thought you wanted an iced coffee, exactly like your friend.”

Woman #2: “No, I HATE iced coffee!”

Me: “Sorry about that, ma’am. I’ll make you a new one right away.”

Woman #2: “No, no, no, I don’t want you to waste it! Just put it in the microwave for me to warm it up!”

(We do not have a microwave in the store, only ovens, and even if we did, you’re not supposed to put plastic into a microwave.)

Me: “It’s no problem. I’ll make you a new one; it won’t take long.”

Woman #2: “No! Just put it in the microwave! I don’t want to waste it!”

Me: *face-palming* “Okay, ma’am.”

Woman #2: “Teens these days, wasting everything! When I was a girl, it was a SIN to put something perfectly good to waste!”

Me: *internally* “I wouldn’t HAVE to waste it if you had ordered correctly in the first place!”

(I end up just making her a completely new, hot coffee.)

Woman #2: “This is the same coffee, RIGHT?”

Me: “Sure, ma’am. Have a good night.”

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