Category: Food & Drink

Stupid Customers, like the rest of us have to eat and drink. Sadly like the rest of us, they sometimes eat with the rest of us. For every waiter, server, drive-thru operator, coffee shop barista, and restaurant manager who has had to deal with fake allergies, vegetarians who don’t know the meaning of the word and idiots who have yet to understand the concept of clearly listed ingredients, we salute you!

Can See A Red Alert Coming

, | Ames, IA, USA | At The Checkout, Food & Drink

Customer: “I’d like an Arctic Rush.”

Me: “What flavor?”

Customer: “Red.”

Me: “Cherry, watermelon, or strawberry kiwi?”

(I had this conversation nearly every time someone ordered an Arctic Rush.)

One Onion Ring To Rule Them All

| NJ, USA | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink

Customer: “I need to make a complaint about your onion rings!”

Boss: “What is the problem with them, sir?”

Customer: “They are elliptical in shape. They are not rings; they are ovals!”

(My boss actually had to have someone go through a bag of onion rings to pick out enough perfectly circular onion rings to remake his order.)

As Thick As Pea Soup

| SC, USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink

Customer: “Excuse me, I’m looking for soup.”

Me: “What kind of soup did you have in mind?”

Customer: “You know, soup.”

Me: *attempting to narrow down the options* “Were you interested in hot and ready to eat soup, or are you looking for canned soup?”

Customer: “I want soup.”

Me: *brain cells beginning to weaken and die* “We carry hot soups in the deli, but otherwise, you’ll find our soup selection in… the soup aisle.”

Customer: “Soup?”

Me: *nodding slowly* “Yep. Soup.”

(Customer wandered away.)

That Was The Last Straw

| Tucson, AZ, USA | Food & Drink, Health & Body

(I am working the lobby of my work place during a lunch rush. A beverage station is getting messy and low on supplies, so I am cleaning it up and restocking the lids. A woman fills her cup up and I am in the way of the lids.)

Me: “Sorry about being in the way. Just doing some cleaning and stocking. Here you are.” *I hand the woman a lid for her beverage along with a straw*

Woman: *with disgust* “Eww, I don’t want that. Your filthy little fingers were all over that. I’ll just help myself, thank you.”

Me: “Oh… uhh, all right…”

(It was difficult to not make a sarcastic retort about how I had to touch all the lids anyway since they don’t stock themselves, but I constrained myself. I can understand germaphobes, for which I always take the extra precaution of washing my hands before handling anything that customers have access to, but no need to be rude.)

The Funniest Things Can Just Turnip

| ME, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(I am a cashier at a grocery store in the middle of my shift when a lady in line unloads and then…)

Customer: *hands me a turnip* “Is this a cabbage?”

Me: “No, this is a turnip.”

Customer: “Well, this was over there with the cabbages and it was the only one there.”

Me: “A cabbage is green and leafy, like lettuce.”

Customer: “I thought it looked funny.”

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