icon_fooddrink

Category: Food & Drink

Stupid Customers, like the rest of us have to eat and drink. Sadly like the rest of us, they sometimes eat with the rest of us. For every waiter, server, drive-thru operator, coffee shop barista, and restaurant manager who has had to deal with fake allergies, vegetarians who don’t know the meaning of the word and idiots who have yet to understand the concept of clearly listed ingredients, we salute you!

icon_languagewords

This Stuff Is Seriously Addictive

| USA | Food & Drink, Language & Words

Customer: “Hey, can I get a pound of crack house ham?”

Me: “Sorry… what was that, sir?”

Customer: *points* “The crack house ham, right here.”

Me: “Sir, do you mean Krakus?”

Customer: “Yeah, that one.”

(Not sure how I kept a straight face through that one.)

icon_mathscience

Well He’s Certainly Not Calling Out Their IQ

| San Antonio, TX, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Math & Science, Popular

(My mother and I stop at a local fast food restaurant, located across from the high school. The high school has varying hours for students, and during this time, only AP students are allowed off campus. We place our order and get in line behind two teenagers to wait for our food. Our number is quickly called. While eating, we notice that the teens are still waiting for their food.)

Server: “Order 219, your food is ready.”

(The server had been calling this number since before we ordered, and we are now halfway done with our food.)

Server: “Last call for order 219.”

(One of the teenagers turns to the other.)

Teen #2: “Are you sure that’s not our order? We’ve been waiting a long time.”

Teen #1: “I’m sure. He’s calling 219 and our number is two-one-nine. See?” *shows friend the receipt*

Teen #2: “Oh, yeah. Well, I hope they hurry with our food. I’m hungry!”

(I fear for the youth of our nation.)

icon_lgbtq

Transcending A**-Holes

| Worcester County, MA, USA | Bigotry, Food & Drink, Popular

(I have a night job cooking and driving deliveries at a pizza place. I’m a transgender woman; work knows this and they refer to me by my preferred name and pronouns and have no problem doing so, but for safety reasons (especially while taking deliveries) I dress and act more masculine than I normally would and do not pitch my voice up. One evening, a woman who is visibly transgender (i.e. most individuals would recognize that she is trans*) comes into the store and orders. I’m happy to see another trans woman, but out of respect for her (and not wanting to out myself) I don’t say anything and treat her like any other female customer. Two minutes later, a group of inebriated college aged men walk in the store likely on their way to one of the bars in town. I ring up their order, and then this exchange happens loud enough that I hear it at the pizza prep station behind the counter:)

Drunk Customer #1: *to his buddy* “Yo, is that a guy or a girl waiting over there?”

Drunk Customer #2: *staring obviously for a few seconds* “I think that’s a dude.”

Drunk Customer #1: “So he’s a drag queen?”

Drunk Customer #2: “Or a f***ing tr***y.”

(They both laugh, and the woman is beginning to look uncomfortable. I bring the gentlemen their food.)

Drunk Customer #1: *to me* “Hey, so, my buddy wants to know, why do you allow freaks like him—” *pointing to the woman* “—in the store?”

Drunk Customer #2: “Sorry, man. I know you probably can’t say anything because you work here, but I think between you, me, and the wall, you could admit that he is really f***ing creepy, right?”

Me: *putting a slight emphasis on the pronoun* “Did she say or do anything to either of you?”

Customers: “…”

Me: “I didn’t think so.”

(At this point I decide I can’t let this go any further…)

Me: “First of all, she’s a customer just like everybody else. More importantly, she’s simply being herself. That’s hard, especially when you go through part of your life living as somebody you’re not, and coming across individuals like certain people in this very store harassing you into going back to be that person you’re not because they’re transphobic.”

Drunk Customer #2: “Yo, dude, chill the f*** out.”

Me: *going into my female voice* “Or have to be somebody they’re not in order to stay safe at work.”

Customers: “…”

(I remove my knit hat and show my shoulder length, femininely styled hair.)

Me: *beaming from ear to ear* “Just so you know, I’m also transgender, or a tr***y as you like to refer to us as.”

(The two drunk gentlemen gathered up their food and bee-lined out the door. I apologized to the original lady, told her she has a trans sister in town, and we’ve been friends ever since. I figured my boss was going to be upset about the situation, but when I told him what happened he laughed and said those two drunk customers had always caused problems and he was glad I scared them away.)

icon_fooddrink

Sadly Such Customers Are Not Rare

| USA | Food & Drink

(Being a butcher shop, most of our meats are quite obviously raw. I am helping a customer pick out a steak.)

Customer: “I want the rare one.”

icon_alcoholwinedrinks

The Cold Reality Of Drinking Alone

| Berkeley, CA, USA | At The Checkout, Food & Drink

(I have had a long day at work and am stopping by a sake brewery on my way home to pick up some for the weekend.)

Me:” I’d like one… no, make that two large bottles of plum sake.”

Salesman: *while bagging my order* “How are you going to drink that?”

Me: *assuming he is asking how I can manage to drink three liters of sake on my own* “Hey! I have friends!”

Salesman: “I prefer to drink it warm, but some people like to drink it cold.”

(Turns out he was asking at what temperature I was going to serve it!)

Page 66/424First...6465666768...Last